Divorce

Notmuchof

My husband and I have just split up after 12 years of being together, two children (2 years old and 4 years old) and we married in 2006.

He is paying me v. little and I now have no choice but to go for a divorce. I have been talking with a private lawyer who deals with cases with an international element. We relocated to New York in June 2009, stayed there for a couple of years and had a child. We went through some v. difficult times, and I found out that he was doing all kinds of inappropriate things. So I decided to leave with the children. He agreed to sign a legal document authorising I leave with the children to reside in the UK. He promised he would join us and said he spoke to his boss to get a transfer back to England.

After about four months he said he could not return as boss said job did not fit in the uk. We tooed and frooed with the idea of returning to the UK. But after a major arguement I have now decided to stay where I am and separate.

The children and I are staying in a very small flat with my mum and he was sending us just about enough to live on. We budgeted hard to clear our debts and start afresh when he returned.

Anyway, now that I have separated with him he has cut the amount he sends to a bear minimum and we simply cannot survive.

So I contacted a lawyer who has provided some estimated figures of how much it will cost. He specialises in international law. I am pretty much broke and he recommended asking a family member (which is not possible), obtaining legal aid or taking out a litigation loan. He has also said that he feels I have a strong case as my husband is doing very well in his job. He has also suggested obtaining legal advice from a New York lawyer who also believes I will do very well, to see which jurisdiction would be best for my case. The US lawyer said that if I can pay upfront costs of about£4000 then after that I can apply for motion of temporary fees.

I don't know what to do, my main priority is to keep the children, and then to at least get enough funds to support us and to find somewhere to live. We have a 2 bed flat that is currently being rented out, and the income from that doesn't even cover the mortgage and fees

Finding legal aid is very difficult, and I don't know whether in the long run it would be the best idea. Also I don't know very much about litigation loans.

Can anyone advise or help and advise please?

Many thanks

neneromanova

If I read that right, You're now living in the UK? and he's in the US?

My Dad's friend (lives in the US) is looking to divorce his ex (she's turned into a headcase and doesn't recognise her anymore) And went to a lawyer over there to see what he would come out with. If he divorces her in the US he will have to pay her a monthly amount of $1000 to her for the rest of her life (even though she went off with another man) but if he was to use a UK lawyer then he doesn't have to pay this monthly money. Your best bet is to try to divorce him in the US so that you get the monthly money from him. Also contact the CSA and see if they can help you with monthly payments as he should be paying you 20% of his monthly wages to help bring the kids up.

Good Luck.

RAS

Which country are you and the children living in?

What is your nationality?

Notmuchof

Thank you. My worry is though that in New York they are renowned for not being favourable to wives. I want to make sure first and foremost that the children remain with me full-time.

As for the advice about where to divorce though - thank you.

Notmuchof

The children and I live in the UK and have done so since August 2011. We have been in mums flat, and currently have nowhere to live.

Notmuchof

I am british, our 4 year old daughter is british and our son was born in the US but has a british passport. We also have a legal document that my husband signed authorising us to reside in the UK.

RAS

Do you have the right to permaNENT REISDENCE?

If you meet the habitual residence test ( and do not shilly shally over which country you are going to live in in the future if you want to pass that), you can claim normal beneifts www.turns2us.org.uk

Youi may also be able to claim mantenance through REMO. GO to the Child Support forum for more advice.

Notmuchof

Thanks. I have done the residence test and passed I believe.

I will look into benefits etc.

Thank you.