Lent money to a friend ... (Advice Needed)

Felix_the_Foccer

If anyone has any advice on the below, or/and the best way of tackling the situation now, I'd be very grateful.

On 30th November lasy year, I lent a friend £300 (cash).

She had been taken to County Court for non-payment of rent and 'supposedly' faced being evicted (or so I was led to believe etc).

She isn't working and when I expressed my concern as to how she would pay me back, she was full of assurances that she would get a Provident loan in March (and pay me back in full).

March 2012 came .. no word, call or texts from her, so I had to ask for my money ... "oh, can't get a Provident loan now, as my son has defaulted" .. (so I'm told), and "she hasn't got a bean."

After having a think, (mainly that I should never have lent her it in the first place!), I said to her "Listen, to save getting an expensive loan, can she at least pay me £20 a month, on the first of each month, I know it will take me 15 months to get my money back etc .. but hopefully she can afford that, and it gets paid off etc.

I also told her I'll need it the first of each month, and not to mess me around, as I just feel like she's taking the pi$$ out of me otherwise ... She has two grown up sons living with her so it's less than £2 a week between them!!!!

I called her on Monday and said could I pop round and collect the £20 (what would have ben the first payment). .. "I've only got a £20 to last me till next Monday, so I can give you a tenner" .... I went round there yesterday, she throws a tenner through my car window ... and walks off saying I'll text you when i have the rest .... " Nice eh .. !

Regrets:

• Lending her the money in the first place!
• Not having made her sign any formal agreement etc ..

Is there any better way I can handle this now ... ? And just to put the top hat on it .. she smokes like a trooper .. and has two sons living with her, both of whom are bringing home approx £1000 a month each.

I know I shouldnt have lent it in the first place, but any advice would be much appreciated.

I'm not sure whether to draft a Loan/Repayment Agreement up now, and ask her can she sign it, although I should have done that before giving her the money.

Also, If I do get payments back from her (She paid me £10 yesterday) I will keep track of them using a Memo on my phone, but is there a better way of doing this, for me, and for her?

Thanks again in advance (and sorry for the long post).

dealer_wins

Well you could persevere with going round there each month and maybe picking up a tenner or the twenty.

Or just write it off, and write her out of your life. Shes is a loser who doesnt give a !!!!!! about her "friend"

Ive seen people learn £5000+ lessons on lending money to family/friends so yours is one of the cheaper lessons!!

Googlewhacker

I would say just let it go, its not worth the stress and hassle you will have to go through.

£290 is a small loss compared to staying friends with her and not knowing the truth

bluebird

I'd continue with collecting £10/£20 she owes you, from what you say you havent done anything wrong,perhaps find out what day she collects her benefits,i'm assuming she's on them so find out what day and grab the money before she goes off to buy smokes.

Be sneeky do what you must to get your money back,if it means small claims then do it.People have to learn borrowing brings grief.

bargainbetty

I would also keep plugging away till you get more of the money. If she sees you aren't giving up, then you might get it all back to stop the pestering. Ask her for it in front of her boys, shame her into borrowing it off them?

And never loan her so much as a bean again. It really is a harsh lesson, but it happens. One of my best mates had borrowed hundreds off me over the years, always with the promise of 'pay you back by xxx'. Eventually, I had to stop lending her it, because I felt so awkward asking about it. She would call and say she had found a great deal on something online, but had to pay by credit card, so could she use mine? I told her I had closed the card and was paying it off so she couldn't. Took three goes before she stopped asking.

Years later she got a settlement over an accident, a rather big one to be honest, and told me that she wanted to sort out all her debts and be free and clear for the first time in years.

Scroll forward a month, and she has a caravan, two camcorders, a new-to-her car and my hand is still empty. She even told me she had sorted out all her debts. I will never lend her anything again.

MonkeyMad

Don't use a memo on your phone, keep an account book you both countersign when she pays, and you ought to give her a receipt that you copy for each payment

Felix_the_Foccer

Thanks for all the helpful replies folks. Much appreciated.

DCFC79

You could try collecting the £10/£20 each month, she might get a bit !!!!ed off with it and offer a lump sum to put an end to it or offer the full amount.

Depends how much you value the £300, could you do without it ?

Id personally try to get it back so she knows that shes done wrong despite you trying to help her out.

Good luck with you decide to do.