so upset.. have lost my way

Racheldevon

Hi,
I would recommend get in touch with your local sure start childen's centre - they run services for families from the antenatal period through to the child's fifth birthday. Every community has access to their services even if the building isn't in your town. Have a look on google to find your nearest one.

They will be able to support you with a range of things you mention in your original post - you could ask to speak to one of their family support workers, who can help you start to unpick some of the things you mention and put into place the support you're able to access

Best Wishes x

BitterAndTwisted

THIRZAH wrote: »

I've always thought that the American custom of bringing food round in a crisis is an excellent idea-I wish someone had popped round with a few casseroles when FIL died.

It's not just in a crisis. My American friends inform me that you can't beat the neighbours off with a stick if you're seen moving into your new property. As a nation they may have a few faults but as individuals they are very different to us indeed. None of that stiff-upper-lip and being very private and discrete nonsense that's the custom here: if anyone senses another in need of any kind, they're there. In numbers.

Over here, people need to be told about troubles and asked for their help and then it will come.

OP: ask for what you may need. The overwhelming majority of ordinary folk are kind and generous beyond imagining, they just need to know you require it and would welcome it.

Gingerjar

Oh bless you. You've had a rubbish time and deserve a big pat on the back for keeping going. All of the above advice is so good, I can't really add to it but just wanted to say don't be hard on yourself and congratulations on your pregnancy

Rebob

Even if the kids are young, get them to help tidy or scrub some potatoes etc ready for dinner. Even if you cannot stomach the smell of cooking just try chopping veg and portion them up for the freezer so they are ready for your hubby to cook. You can chop and freeze onions, mushrooms, cabbage, cauliflour, carrots, brocolli........ Freeze them into one meal amounts.

Just have 10 minute blasts of cleaning and tidying. If you all do this, the house will improve in no time and then you will not feel so overwhelmed.

Good luck with the home, family and the new baby on its way
xxx

rosie383

I feel for you. I echo every thing that has already been said. I think anyone who has suffered from morning sickness can empathise. Definitely ask for help. There are only four of you, so it wouldn't be a big hardship for a friend to give you a shepherd's pie, lasagna etc.
The SC was a godsend when I was pregnant, as it really doesn't need much prep, and the smells tend top stay in it. Just get your dh to take the lid off once in a while to give it a stir. You don't need to be in the kitchen for that bit.
And as for the housework.... it will get done eventually..... even months down the line. If a friend offers to help out, let them come and spend a morning cleaning. I have done it for friends before, and it can make a massive difference. I don't think anyone would offer unless they really wanted to do it.

snowleopard61

Hi Princess, that sounds absolutely horrible for you. Although I've been lucky enough to have avoided sickness in pregnancy, I can only imagine it's like being terribly travel-sick without being able to get off ... how grim.

You've had lots of good advice already and I can only add that your health visitor or GP may be able to put you in touch with someone who could give you a hand, at least with the older children. And that young children often positively prefer very simple raw food such as chopped vegetables with chunks of cheese followed by fruit, yoghurt etc., which is nutritious for them and may be a bit easier for you to deal with than actually cooking. If it doesn't seem like much of a meal to you, that doesn't matter - you'll have plenty of time for cooking proper meals later on.

Good luck and hope things get a bit easier soon.

Butterfly_Brain

Don't knock yourself out, it is not your fault I still can't stand the smell of tea from when I was pregnant with DS and he is 18 this week:eek: It took me over a year to recover from both CS because there were complications, so my housework was the last worry on my mind.
The housework will outlive you;) so don't worry too much it is surprising how much better the place looks after a quick hoover and dust. You don't say how old your DD's are. I had both of mine helping tidy and dust from the age of three it was a great game to them, so what if it isn't perfect, they are learning and if they do it with you it makes them feel special - just make it into a game and make sure that you give them plenty of praise.
Do you have family, friends or good neighbours close by who could help with meals?

Pasta meals are quick, cheap and easy to prepare
Basic Macaroni Cheese... Pasta, chopped onion, cheese sauce with some grated cheese on top and popped under the grill until it bubbles.
Saturday night special
Pasta, cheese sauce, pepperoni slices, sliced mushrooms, tin of tomatoes Mix it all together and popped in a dish in a 180c oven with some bread crumbs and grated cheese on top, cook for 20 mins until the cheese is bubbling.

Tuna and sweetcorn pasta

Jacket potatoes and beans with sausages

Golden vegetable rice with omelette

Cheats sausage toad, just cook sausages in the oven and use frozen yorkshire puds, serve with potatoes and broccoli from the freezer

Buy some flour tortillas or pittas and use them as a pizza base.

Use flour tortillas and pop in a filling of either chicken and sweetcorn, or a basic mince (You could use a tin of mince and onions plus a tin of tomatoes, some carrots and mushrooms for this) and roll up like you would a pancake and put them in a dish cover with a white or cheese sauce and again in the oven 180c for 20 mins.

Potatoes don't need to be peeled just wash well (you might want to use pre washed ones then wash then again before boiling) to make sure all is safe seeing that you are pregnant. You can also just pop them in the oven with a little lemon juice and garlic or rosemary and salt for a tasty alternative to roasties

Instant mash is a handy stand by use it to top a cottage pie or to make tuna fish cakes, potato scones or potato pastry.

Buy lean streaky bacon and chop it up to use in carbonara or to sprinkle on top of a pizza.

Oven risottos are cheap and quick
http://www.deliaonline.com/recipes/cuisine/european/italian/oven-baked-wild-mushroom-risotto.html

http://www.deliaonline.com/recipes/cuisine/european/italian/oven-baked-risotto-carbonara.html

http://www.deliaonline.com/recipes/galleries/quick-work

http://www.deliaonline.com/search.html?search_term=first+time+cooks&x=0&y=0

auntymabel

Can't add much to what has already been said. 9 months eems a very long time when you're suffering from sickness but it will come to an end and for now forget anything that's not essential.

My cheap convenience food is tinned soup. It makes great pasta or rice topping and you can always add bits to it if you want to. Noodles even quicker but more expensive than pasta and more fatty.

Good Luck

abitofhelp

i really cant add anything else to help you than what has been posted. i would really like to send you best wishes for the future though. you have been given some fab advice already. i remember the sickness only to well. i wish i had had my slowcooker when i was pregnant it would have been a godsend.