Do I need to inform anyone?

Morlock

RainbowDreamer wrote: »

If I should be paying him money, then I will set up a direct debit to do so once a court order is in place and we know how contact will be for the forceable future.

Whether or not you should pay him is a moral stance, you are not legally obliged to give him anything.

RainbowDreamer wrote: »

I always thought he should be paying maintenance, which I thought would of ofset the benefits I get for the children. But maybe I am wrong.

Not any more, he is obliged to pay maintenance on top of any benefits that you claim, child maintenance is disregarded income. He would have received a discount on his maintenance liability as a shared-carer.

RainbowDreamer wrote: »

I simply posted to ask advice on if I need to tell the people who pay me, as I did not want to owe them money if they are supposed to suspend the claim while the children are not with me.

It is likely that he has placed a claim himself, in which case it will be adjudicated. If the children live with him until the court decide on custody arrangements, the payments will probably be transferred to him and you will then become liable for child maintenance payments.

RainbowDreamer wrote: »

Sorry.. I suppose I am not making much sense. Very stressed at the moment. Apologies.

Good luck.

RainbowDreamer

He agreed through solicitors to collect them a day later and to return them a day later. On the day he then changed his mind. But it had all been confirmed in writing by my solicitor and his.
I wasn't keeping him from his children. I was takings them to a birthday party that my eldest very much wanted to go to.
I kept them for the week because the ex became abusive and got arrested and because the police advised me not to answer the door and to contact my solicitor.

real1314

RainbowDreamer wrote: »

He agreed through solicitors to collect them a day later and to return them a day later. On the day he then changed his mind. But it had all been confirmed in writing by my solicitor and his.
I wasn't keeping him from his children. I was takings them to a birthday party that my eldest very much wanted to go to.
I kept them for the week because the ex became abusive and got arrested and because the police advised me not to answer the door and to contact my solicitor.

I apologise, that makes a huge difference. I'm not going to say any more on your situation.

fogartyblue.

For the life of me I can't understand what the guy is on about.

There are two things here.

Benefits
Maintenance

Benefits will normally go to the parent with care - end of.
Maintenance - he should also be making these payments either privately or through the CSA.
If he should be paying say a total of £100 a week, then if the children are with him for 50% of that week, he should only pay £50 to the mother.

The guy seems to forget that he is liable to pay maintenance for his children to their mother. What the mother also receives in benefits has nothing to do with him.

The cheek of him - will not pay maintenance AND wants the mother's benefits as well. He should get a job like most good fathers do and make sure that he supports them properly and not use them a tool in his game with the mum.

And yes I am a dad of 2 (twin girls) and have 4 grandchildren and who knows what was best for my kids when they were young. I went to work and my wife stayed at home to bring them up full time as well provide a home for all of us.
The guy is one scroat that deserves to have his visitation rights withdrawn - as well as his bo****ks taken away so that he can't spawn any more!!

Soapn

you shouldn't continue claiming for kids that aren't with you, otherwise it's fraud is it not?

Ellejmorgan

Actually you are allowed to claim child benefit for 8 weeks, not too sure about tax credits..

Soapn

I'm sure the ex other half has already started a claim for the kids if he intends keeping them. or he could do what others have to, and get a job and support his own kids I suppose.
How can you claim child benefit for 8 weeks when you don't have the kids?

FBaby

OP, I really really do feel for your missing your children every day and feeling the anxiety of the uncertainty of the situation. I do hope this gets sorted asap.

However, I remember your previous thread very well and I really think you have done nothing to help your relationship with your ex, on the opposite, I think you have been very good at stiring things up. I also think you are good at pretending ignorance on things to take on the role of victim.

You are pretending here not to understand why you should have to share some of your benefits with your ex, even though it was explaiend to you in details in your previous thread. It doesn't take a genius to understand that if you have 50% share care, or just about of your children, it makes sense that you share 50% or there about of the benefits you receive for your children which amount is awarded on the basis of you having the children full-time. You have chosen and stuck to legalities to pretend that you are doing nothing wrong. Haven't you learnt yet that solicitors' job is not to advise you on what is the right thing to do, but on what you can get away with without getting into trouble?

You seem confident you will get your children's back, I hope for your sake you are right, but if you choose to continue to ignore what you, as a responsible, caring parental role model, should be doing, that is sharing the benefits you receive for YOUR children, not you, with your ex, the war will continue again and again, and that will do much much more damage to your children than having to do with a bit less when they are with you because you will have a little less money. Of course, as it was suggested to you before, there is always the possibility of looking for a job when the children are with their dad.