compassion fatigue

Nicki

I'd be interested in some views and advice on a tricky employment situation particularly from employers or those in management please.

My husband and I employ someone in the home. We pay her well (the top end of the range for this kind of role) and pay tax, national insurance, holiday pay and SSP.

The employee's attendance record is not good. Since she started nearly two years ago, she has fairly regularly called in odd days with minor sicknesses which I personally would not have taken time off for.

Since January this year, she has had 2 weeks and 1 day off sick (eventually producing a medical certificate but begrudgingly), and 3 days off compassionate leave for the death of a grandparent who lives overseas. Yesterday she phoned to say that she was not coming in to work as agreed because she had learned another overseas relative even more distant had died.

To be honest, I am suffering compassion fatigue. I need someone reliable who will turn up when she is expected, so that if I have made plans I can stick to them.

I feel that I am fulfilling my obligations as an employer by paying her properly in accordance with the law, at a generous rate, with decent holiday entitlements, but that because she is working in the home and I am often around, she is not giving me the respect of treating this as a proper job. How do others handle persistant absenteeism, particularly if there is a "reason" for the employee not turning up if this is causing a problem, but the employee has accrued employment rights?

poet123

How many days a week is she contracted to work? I too would be getting fed up with this if she is not full time.

whitewing

What shift patterns does she do? Perhaps these patterns need reviewing. Young people's lives change a lot especially due to timetabling and stuff. Maybe if you sat down each week and agreed a rota for the following week it would help alleviate the problem for you both.

Could you possibly look to have a second helper, say on a week on/week off basis, and if one knows there will be difficulty with a shift then maybe the other is available. What you may find is that neither is available though.

If you have space in your house, maybe having an au pair through an agency would work well, especially if you are around.

Or a job share nanny may have a longer term view of things, or an agency may be able to provide care at short term notice.

There will always be absences, and things do often seem to happen in chunks.

Judith_W

Do you pay her when she is off sick? Stop that if you do. If you want to sack her due to sickness you should get advice as you would need to have a sickness policy, then warn her when she breaks it and give her a chance to improve, and only then sack her if she keeps on being sick.

I would also suggest having an adult chat with her about how important it is for her to attend, and that you accept if she is ill then she may not get as much done around the house but that if she is needed so you can be somewhere else, this is vital.

I would think if she gets a better idea of how strongly you are considering getting rid of her she might improve.

Nicki

poet123 wrote: »

How many days a week is she contracted to work? I too would be getting fed up with this if she is not full time.

She is contracted to work 18 hours per week, and these have been set to fit round her other commitments, and are reviewed regularly as her lectures change to make sure they still suit.

I'm not prepared to employ two people to do this job because one is breaking their contract on a regular basis! Nor do I want a live in helper, just someone who understands that this is a job, not a favour that she is doing me when she can be bothered. We pay a significant sum - more than 3 times national minimum wage - out of my husband's earned taxed income, even when she is not actually working at all because she is on holiday or sick (sick pay is obviously less but still money coming out of our account for no return).

I am legally required to pay her SSP when she is off sick, as she earns over the threshold, but I have stopped some time ago paying her for the qualifying days.

A sick policy sounds like what I need. Does anyone happen to have one I could have a look at for ideas on what it should contain?

sammyroser

First step is to talk to the employee, Tell them something along the lines of

"You've been missing about one day every couple of weeks and I need to be able to count on you to be here for your shifts.. The frequency of these unplanned absences is too high. From now on I need you to be here every day you are due in except in the most extreme of circumstances. Can you commit to doing that?"

If she continues to have unplanned absences that are too much you will have to enforce consequences.

You of course should be sympathetic to deaths of family members.

If you go through the right procedures than the employee can be dismissed for sickness. But hopefully and usually the employee turns themselves around with a serious talk.

Edit: This is a good site to use to know what to include in a sickness and absence policy. http://www.businesslink.gov.uk/bdotg/action/detail?itemId=1073793839&type=RESOURCES

As for SSP you only need to pay it if she is sick for four days in a row. If she takes one day sick, comes in the next and then takes two more days she is not entitled to SSP

cazziebo

Other than her attendance, is she a good employee? Do the children like her, does she do a good job?

In my experience, persistent absence is rarely due to a variety of health/compassion issues. Yes, someone can have a run of bad luck but once that's over, things get back on an even keel. Poor attendance is more likely to be about morale. If someone is happy in their work then they don' take time off if they can help it.

Does she enjoy the job? Does she feel valued? Is there a way it could be made more stimulating, suitable, easier or challenging? What's her long term aspirations?

As one of the other posters says, you have to have an open and honest discussion, and be prepared to accept some of the responsibility. The result may be a parting of the ways, but then people rarely do this kind of work from youth until retirement so there is likely to be continual changes. It may just be she feels taken for granted, or that it's time for her to move on. If that's the case you want to gain agreement that she sticks around long enough for you to find a successor.

Nicki

She may be unhappy in the job, but she doesn't show any signs of being so, and her absenteeism has been a problem right from the beginning, but has just got worse since January, or I have lost patience with it perhaps. She is otherwise good at what she does but reliability is paramount to me.

As for compassion for bereavement, I'd welcome a steer on what is reasonable, which was one reason to post. When I worked, I would not have been given compassionate leave at all for a non resident grandparent and non resident aunt - and certainly not 3 days for 1 and 1 for the other. So whilst, I didn't make an issue at the time, I'd like to put some ground rules in place, as one of the things about a permanent job surely is that you do need to keep turning up for it even if bad things are happening in your life? A close family bereavement is a different thing, but relatives who live in a different country when you aren't planning on travelling for a funeral?

Googlewhacker

From the sounds of it it makes me feel that you want rid of her so if you need to start going through capability procedures and hopefully the fact you are getting serious she will do one of two things

1) buck up her ideas
2) Leave

sammyroser

Until you have a sickness or absence policy you haven't got much of a leg to stand on, you need a guideline for her to follow and you to bring up when she has unacceptable absences. Put one into place and have a meeting with your employee. Explain that due to her frequent unplanned absences you have had to put into place a new policy, go through it with her and ask if she has any questions. Tell her that from now your expect her to follow the policy otherwise there will be consequences that could lead to her losing her employment. Most companies have a compassionate leave policy which includes close family bereavement (at which point you explain what you consider this to be) which allow under your discretion employee's to be eligible for two days paid leave.

Other things to consider are
• Serious illness/injury of a dependant - may not be relevant with this employee but for future employees. This usually allows up to two days off to arrange care for the child. Again at your discretion.
• Unexpected incident involving a child/dependant - your employee can take reasonable unpaid time off.

I personally am known to be a bit tough with people who take time off work too easily. I lay it out to them straight that if they are not feeling great they should still come to work and I will find them something they are able to do.

poet123

Perhaps You are employing the wrong type of person. Maybe she is not really interested in this type of work and so is not committed enough to pass up "better offers" in terms of seeing friends etc, because like you I doubt she is actually sick. Maybe you would be better approaching colleges who run childcare courses asking for a student they could recommend, there must be loads of such students who would give their eye teeth for that kind of experience and remuneration.

It sounds as if you are being eminently fair and she is taking advantage of you. As you say, for the money and working conditions it is not too much to expect reliability particularly as you have a disabled child in the equation. I think it is time to either cut your losses or draw up a watertight contract with clear expectations set out for both sides.