letter says i have been overpaid £13,726 !

DaisyFlower

Missed the part where he pays all the bills, mortgage and council tax and it appears the OP doesnt work as she says no tax credits means no money. To tax credits it looks like you are a family, DH works and pays the bills and you stay home with the children.

With financial ties, no divorce and living together with neither of you attempting to move out for some time I cant see you persuading them they you are single.

welshgirl39

Thank you for all your replies, i can completely understand your remarks and therefore to a certain extent can see how this looks to the HMRC review team, however, its a lot more complicated , i have been honest with them and sent off all paperwork regarding to the seperate bank accounts, etc , i came to an arrangement with my husband to what bills he would be responsible for and myself, nothing is joint, it worked the best way for me at the time. but can see now that ultimately it is as if we both contribute to the household, albeit seperately,ie, he pays the mortgage, water and council tax and i pay the gas, elec tv licence etc its regarded as doing it together. He wont divorce me as he says he cant afford it, i had no interest in divorcing him as our marriage ended a long time ago, another factor is the reason for this in that I have had a girlfriend for the past few years , which he is fully aware of. I have no emotional or physical links to him.
I have spoken with him regarding the financial aspect this morning as no i have no income, my youngest is starting school soon, so will then be able to return to work.He pay csa for another child from a relationship so he says he cant afford to support this household fully. We wont claim as a couple as we are not . so i have no idea how they are going to recover the money, i have no idea what i am supposed to support myself and my chidren on , if i am not entitled to any benefits , therefore no help with childcare if i was to return to work at the moment. Its a huge worry. I have asked my husband to move out lots but he refuses, the violence has never happened again, and i dont see why i should move out of the house. i will have to get legal advice as the best way forward, its mentioned a few times the financial ties between us, what exactly ? i dont feel i have any ties to him apart from the children. Also a couple financially, i dont agree with this either, everything i own is seperate to him and nothing is joint at all. its so confusing. i feel as if im living in his house and paying what i can towards running the house for the children, not that he is living at my house contributing to me. i have just re read some posts and can see how sharing bills is interpreted, although we dont share the same bills, we decided what ones we would each pay, his being more as he works. oh i dont know, i will just have to speak to a solicitor, Thanks again.

Ladyshopper

You keep saying you have no income, but then you also say you are paying some of the bills, so you must have some money coming in - presumably the tax credits?

What about food, who buys that? Who cooks, do you eat together?

midnight_express

You will still be entitled to child benefit.

nottslass_2

If they think you are guilty of fraud,prosecute and you are unable to pay the money back then you have to accept that you could go to prision.

How exactly are you managing to feed yourself and 4 children if you have no money or is your husband indeed supporting you ?

I'm sorry but I really cannot understand why you are choosing to live with this man and risk prosecution for benifit fraud just becuase "you dont see why you should move out of the house".

Kimberley

If you split from a partner then either one of you need to move out in order to claim as a single person. It doesn't matter if you sleep in different beds or not you are still classed as being a couple. You should never have claimed as a single person, that was your mistake and you need to pay it back.

Charityworker

Talk about scare mongering. Going on about prison and fraud. The OP told the benefit people of all her circumstances and never covered anything up. It's therefore the benefit offices error, not hers and she should state that in an appeal. It's probably someone at the benefit office being threatened with redundancy so they have to make themselves look busy. So they probably looked on the computer saying "who's life can I make a misery now?". It's their mistake, not hers, she has not tried to hide anything from them.

whitewing

Does your girlfriend live in the house with you?

Should her income be factored into the equation?

Caz3121

Make the break - you say you have been apart for several years and he won't move. You say your youngest is due to start school and you intend to stay put until they are 18...You need to get on with your life and living in the same home as an ex for another 13+ years is not the way to do it. (without even considering the benefits issue)

See a solicitor and, if necessary, take the steps to have the house sold (or him buy you out) then get yourself somewhere else and get maintenance.

I left an abusive relationship, left the family home and took my daughter and rented. I worked damn hard for the house (he rarely worked) but when it came to it, it was only bricks and mortar...I paid my rent and the mortgage (to protect my credit rating as he wouldn't) and the divorce took a long time through solicitors but I am free from him and have a new, much better, life

oldhand

I can understand how you believe your hands are tied regarding a husband who wont move out,but looking at it from the benefits agencies point of view if couples who were living together decided to tell the agency they are no longer a couple and want to claim as single persons but are to continue living under the same roof and sharing some bills everyone would do it for the extra benefits it brings.