working with someone who suffers from depression

moneypuddle

Hi

edit: Thanks everyone for your responses. I have now edited my original post as I worry about the person in question recognizing me/her from what I've said and feel that could make things any worse. But to anyone who has just opened this thread I work with someone with depression and because they are not capable of their own role at the minute, its being pushed on to me. I am pregnant (which she doesn't know about, but my boss does) so beginning to stress about the extra workload now

Thanks

dandelionclock30

If she cant do her job and is ill then she needs to be off sick and they need to be getting someone who can temp to do it. Are you in a union? if so ask them for some support.
I would say to the boss that as you are busy you can only really cope with your role not doing the extra from someone elce who isnt doing theirs. Ask if they can come up with an acceptable solution.If they dont then I would be raising it with HR as its not fair. You are only being paid for 1 role not 2. I would put my foot down, its not the girls fault if she too ill to work but the manager needs to be sorting the matter out.

LouLou

As someone who has had huge highs and lows throughout most of my adult life..I'd say your assuming she'll react negatively to news of your pregnancy is more about her personality, than her depression (though, of course if there are traumas related to her own fertility, that may account for a negative reaction too). Personally, no matter which state I'm in, I try to be encouraging when others have good news. It's not their fault I'm in the doldrums.

The problem also, for those who don't have mood disorders, is that a depressed person's actions just seem like laziness/self absorbed behaviour. Which I can fully understand.

It's a shame that others in the team are having to bear the burdens, and this is a problem that your boss shouldn't ignore. Resentment will build (there's already an atmosphere) and it really isn't fair to carry extra work and stress due to another's illness. The way I see it, depression is an illness, it's just hard for those outside looking in to fully grasp what's going on in another's head.

Really, your boss needs to be more proactive and empathetic, if he can. Perhaps a team meeting is needed? My experience of dealing with depression and a very unsympathetic employer can't shed much light here as to official procedures/in-work support, I'm afraid.

Interested to read others' reactions to this.

Evilm

Depression or not your boss needs to man up and do his job - which is to get her to do hers.

If she isn't capable of working and sits there playing with her phone, not even preparing to work during working hours then she shouldn't be there. A few minutes of distraction or needing to go for a walk or a break for a few minutes is fine but to the level you are talking it is not.

They should be sending her home when she's obviously not capable that day and getting in a temp to cover. Preferably this means having someone to cover all the time in case she's useless that day since they won't know in advance.

Your boss is being a walk over. Yes, he should be dealing with it carefully but that doesn't mean ignoring it and expecting other staff members to carry the burden. I'm not slamming those with depression either - I've been through a few bouts myself and know it can be difficult. However its even more difficult when someone is clearly playing into it and letting you get away with stuff when they should be pulling you aside and saying "If you don't feel up to it then should you be here today?"

Xhale_2

They should be offering her help. time off. sick leave and I would worry that she may not be getting the medical attention she may need. These aren't your problem though and it is wrong for you to have to take on more and have your health put at risk. I am so pleased that you aren't blaming the other person she is clearly ill.

LouLou

It might be a case of the boss being very fond of this person, or just sympathising and assuming it's a temporary phase (I see the OP mentioned she's had these ups and downs before).

If so, it is favouritism in a way, albeit done with good intentions. I agree he really has to put his foot down and get someone in who can cope with the workload. Sitting playing with a phone and not switching her computer on really can't continue, ill or not.

moneypuddle

Thanks guys. My boss (female and very motherly) is on holiday at the minute but I'm going to try to tackle this in a couple of weeks when she's back

moneypuddle

Oh and I also just wanted to say thank you for not bashing me and considering me selfish in bringing this up. I do understand its not her fault - its just that three years on and off of this is really starting to take its toll on how I feel about going to work every day

marybelle01

The

moneypuddle wrote: »

Oh and I also just wanted to say thank you for not bashing me and considering me selfish in bringing this up. I do understand its not her fault - its just that three years on and off of this is really starting to take its toll on how I feel about going to work every day

Then that is what you need to say. This isn't about you being cruel to her. This is about the impact her behaviour has on other people, the quality of their work, and the business. It isn't your fault that she suffers from depression either! The manager has a duty of care to all of you and not just her, and needs to be considering how long it is going to be before this depression gets "contagious". If other staff can't keep picking up the pieces, how long will it be before people are off sick with stress?

fedster

Someone with Depression who refuses to get help, and be helped, and just goes through the motions of life, is not a good person to have in the workplace, Business is ruthless, and to have an Emploree with severe Depression is going to lead to lower productivity, and if the Manager does nothing about it, than imo he is a poor manager, i am suprised the person mentioned has not been sacked yet, after all as i said if a person doesnt want to help him/herself, how can others?

If you let severe Depression go untreated, a loss of a Job is the least of your worries.

Googlewhacker

Sorry but walking out once due to any illness is just about acceptable but to walk out three times and nothing been done about it is unacceptable.....

I agree with Evilm, the manager needs to woman up and do something about it because their duty of care is not just to that person but to the other members of staff as well!