Nursery worker told she HAS to eat with children

Sambucus_Nigra

mildred1978 wrote: »

My almost-2 year old eats exactly what I eat and has done since he was 6 months old, no mashing or pur!eing or special "baby meals". We had lamb shanks tonight and roast chicken dinner yesterday. He's never eaten a chicken nugget or a fish finger. Believe it or not there doesn't have to be "baby food" v "adult food".

That's great. Nothing to do with the actual thread but great all the same. I'm sure if your boss told you to eat macaroni cheese you'd be up in arms.

delain

I don't like macaroni cheese. My OH loves it though, we'd have to job share so he could have mac cheese days and I wouldn't have to cook it at home! It's a lot of effort for something I don't like. Selfish, me

renowen

I like home made Mac Cheese ....... the stuff from the can is vile though!

What was this thread about again??????

sammyroser

In which case I agree she shouldn't be forced to the same food as the children. When my 4 year old nephews used to shove disgusting food at me to share with them I would pretend to chew on it and that would make them happy.

At the end of the day I think she needs to have a discussion with the boss about having to eat the same food.

Dunroamin

mildred1978 wrote: »

My almost-2 year old eats exactly what I eat and has done since he was 6 months old, no mashing or pur!eing or special "baby meals". We had lamb shanks tonight and roast chicken dinner yesterday. He's never eaten a chicken nugget or a fish finger. Believe it or not there doesn't have to be "baby food" v "adult food".

I'd be wanting to know why the kids weren't being fed normal food!!

I agree but from what the OP has said they are. There's nothing intrinsically chioldish about macaroni cheese or spaghetti.

delain

renowen wrote: »

I like home made Mac Cheese ....... the stuff from the can is vile though!

What was this thread about again??????

OH will only eat home made as well. Can't say I blame him, the canned stuff smells like sick.

DeviantDepp

Hi OP
I have skim read through the thread as it appears to be turning into a discussion ino the merit of various pasta based foods so my apologies if this has already been said!

I cannot think of any specific employment law or statute that your gf could use to say her employer was in the 'wrong'.

As someone in HR, if I were being asked if a manager could force staff to eat a certain food at work I would be challenging that manager as to weather this fell into the catagory of a 'reasonable management request'....

My angle would be that we can take disciplinary action if a member of staff fails to or refuses to follow a 'reasonable management request' but is this really 'reasonable'? And the old favourite- what would a Tribunal say? If a member of staff took us to Tribunal for unfair/ constructive dismissal would that manager feel comfortable defending the request (and not make the company look unreasonable).

HOWEVER I do not work in childcare, I do not know what your gf's employer/ manager/ company is like and I do not know your gf- is she willing to, potentially, walk away from/ lose her job over this?

Also to the suggestion of faking a medical problem, I can see why this was suggested but, as an employer, I would be asking for proof of this before I let her be treated differently to all out other staff.

HTH

JimmyTheWig

I think it's a reasonable request, but I also think it is reasonable for a staff member to refuse it on days when they don't like the meal that is served.
Presumably there is some variety (10 dishes, maybe - you wouldn't want the children eating the same thing every week) and maybe even a choice (e.g. vegetarian, halal, dairy-free, etc).

If your GF really doesn't like anything on offer any day then I would think this is more like food phobia. In which case I think it would be worth her seeing someone to get a diagnosis for herself, and explaining the problem to the manager should then not be a problem. [Hopefully, once diagnosed she may be able to get help, and overcome the problem.]
Otherwise I think it is reasonable for her to say that she doesn't like / can't eat x, y or z and to come to an arrangement on days when they are the only choices.
I think that it is reasonable for her to follow the same rules that the children have to follow. I presume that a child who has a dairy intollerance isn't forced to eat macaroni cheese? I presume that a child who is a vegetarian isn't forced to eat sausages? I would liek to think that a child who otherwise eats healthily but really doesn't like the taste of fish is given some sort of other choice on fish days. I presume that a food phobic child would be dealt with appropriately.

If it can be made to work then I think that this is a brilliant thing for the nursery to do. I think that there is so much to be said for communal eating. Not all families can manage to do this at home, so to be able to do it at nursery will set such a good example to the children.

InA

is there an issue in the nursery of some of the children not eating their food properly?

this is just another perspective, but my goddaughter (only child) was a very picky eater and wouldn't touch her food if her mum wasn't eating the same thing. children are observant and they do pick up on things that adults do and try to imitate them. it's not easy to tell a child that they have to finish their food, if they have just seen an adult (who they see as the rule setters) not finish their own. children aren't going to follow rules if they think it's optional.

i'm not too clear on how someone can pretend to eat? presumably the plate of food would still have food on it at the end of the meal. maybe this is the issue?

i don't think the idea is as crazy as it sounds to some of the posters here, but this is only because i've experienced first hand a child who was a fussy eater and i know how problematic it can be to try to get them to eat something or to eat enough.

azana_2

my own kids eat "food" rather than "kids' food" too - which is what it sounds like they are doing at this nursery.

Maybe the OP's gf should try and see this as 1) free lunch (result) 2) perhaps even helpful in widening what she eats

Much as I agree no one should be forced to eat anything it's hard in all honesty to see the issue with being offered free, homemade food - I eat with the kids at my place of work regularly (albeit older kids in canteen) and have to pay for the honour - if this were me I'd be seeing free food as a result frankly - sure they will provide more than one menu choice as they must have to cater for different allergies etc.

Why not encourage her to give it a go rather than trying to find out if it breaks some employment law, surely eating with the kids shows good will and isn't going to kill her?