I need financial help visiting my baby in hospital.

thelawnet

purple.sarah wrote: »

Sorry didn't realise it wasn't your comment but it was wrong and you were defending it. You were making a political point by defending the coalition and saying they shouldn't be called con-dems and this isn't the time or the place.

Eh????

I said it was inappropriate to make political points (about con-dems) when desperate for help, and you reckon I'm the one making political points????

Derivative

Condoms don't always work even when used correctly and anyway a family might be able to budget for a new baby but not the unexpected expense of them being ill. You don't know the circumstances.

Not read much of the post, but I would posit that a child being ill is part of the budgeting process. Having children is not like buying a car of which you can just scrap if it becomes unaffordable.

kingfisherblue

Derivative wrote: »

Not read much of the post, but I would posit that a child being ill is part of the budgeting process. Having children is not like buying a car of which you can just scrap if it becomes unaffordable.

Few people expect a new baby to be very ill or to be born with a life threatening condition. The OP did say that she had expected to give birth and go home afterwards, as she had with her other children. With a baby born with serious medical problems, this cannot happen and puts immense strain on the parents, not only emotionally, but also financially. The baby in this case is in Liverpool and her family lives in Manchester. When you give birth, you don't expect your child to be transferred to a hospital several miles away and for them to stay there for an unspecified period of time.

There was no suggestion that the OP's baby is anything like buying a car and I find your post offensive because you use sucvh an inappropriate comparison. Do you have any experience of what the OP is going through? Do you have any empathy?

OP, I hope that your daughter is making a good recovery from her first operation.

kazzah60

Derivative wrote: »

Not read much of the post, but I would posit that a child being ill is part of the budgeting process. Having children is not like buying a car of which you can just scrap if it becomes unaffordable.

well sadly we can't all have " perfect babies" with no health problems or issues, and I would say that 99.99% of people having a baby would NOT expect the baby to need urgent life saving treatment some miles from home, and therefore it is not something you could prepare for
having had two babies needing treatment in NICU my heart goes out to the OP and I hope her baby thrives and goes home shortly

we have been in a similar position with our younger son needing treatment some 100 + miles from our home and we were VERY grateful to friends and relatives who loaned us a car and even put petrol in it for us so we didn't have to worry about the costs.

your comments are rather naive to say the least

Derivative

kazzah60 wrote: »

well sadly we can't all have " perfect babies" with no health problems or issues, and I would say that 99.99% of people having a baby would NOT expect the baby to need urgent life saving treatment some miles from home, and therefore it is not something you could prepare for
having had two babies needing treatment in NICU my heart goes out to the OP and I hope her baby thrives and goes home shortly

we have been in a similar position with our younger son needing treatment some 100 + miles from our home and we were VERY grateful to friends and relatives who loaned us a car and even put petrol in it for us so we didn't have to worry about the costs.

your comments are rather naive to say the least

It's not about having 'perfect babies'.

My post was in reply to this comment:

a family might be able to budget for a new baby but not the unexpected expense of them being ill.

Babies being ill is an expected expense, and even if not - of course you can't plan for every situation, but bringing another human life into this world? A few grand 'just in case' seems like a good idea, surely?

Naive? If I had a few quid in my back pocket, I wouldn't have kids. (In fact, I don't have enough money, and that's why I haven't yet and won't for the foreseeable future).

There was no suggestion that the OP's baby is anything like buying a car and I find your post offensive because you use sucvh an inappropriate comparison. Do you have any experience of what the OP is going through? Do you have any empathy?

What do you mean by "there was no suggestion"? I am suggesting it. When you choose to bring children into this world, you should make adequate preparation for their birth.

The car analogy was chosen because having children is much like buying a car - you don't just get the thing and then that's that, there are ongoing costs, unexpected 'repairs' (no humour intended in any way), petrol costs (food), and so on. Things that you plan for when making the purchase (especially if you're already stretched!)

We're not talking hundreds of thousands here, just a few grand set aside for petrol.

I have empathy but there are limits to it, and choosing to have another child when three already stretch the budget just seems daft to me. Why?

kingfisherblue

Yes, there are ongoing costs when having a child. Illness is part of that cost. However, when you first buy a car you don't expect the costs to soar suddenly because repairs are needed. It is the same with a child - you don't expect them to need medical help in a hospital that is miles from home. Also, post 8 states that condoms were in use at the time, so presumably this baby was unplanned. That doesn't give a family much time to save 'a few grand'.

When I get a new car, I don't have a few grand set aside for petrol - it is budgeted for monthly.

According to reports (Contact a Family, if my memory serves me correctly), it costs three times more, on average, to bring up a disabled child than to bring up a child with no disabilities. Having a heart condition at birth, requiring two operations within a short space of time and at a hospital in a different city to where the parents live, is an expense that is unlikely to be considered by the majority of expectant parents. Hopefully the OP's child will recover fully from surgery and grow up with no disabilities.

kazzah60

jheadz wrote: »

If you need help for financial I can help you for loans with a lowest interest rate.

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niachard

i know exactly how you are feeling my son spent 3 months in bristol childrens hospital they found a heart defect just after birth and it was a snowball affect from there on he had 3 operations in his first 2 months of life and is now 14 months old and waiting for his second open heart surgery any time now.
the hospital should be able to direct you to the social services office that is linked to the hospital they have a social fund and will give you food vouchers or £25 a week towards travel etc the nurses on PICU should be able to steer you i the right direction they just need some details about ur income and benifits, you can claim DLA from 3 months old for the baby, this has been a godsend and were saving it all for this next trip to bristol as we now know how much of a strain it is financialy, we also have a 3 year old with autism so it wes doubley hard with him as well
get your name on the list for ronald mc donald as soon as possible as there is always a waiting list to get a place, its amamzing like home from home. there are afew charities i.e. family find but they take about 12 weeks to process an application, react is another one and you could try cerebra.
good luck to you i know how hard it is, finacialy, physicaly and emotionaly and i hope baby has a speedy recovery nothing can prepare you for what is to come but it will make you a stronger person.