So fed up with myself!

SJ_Jones

I've been in debt for years! Since I left uni in 2002, and I'm not even talking about student loan!

Just before Christmas after finishing my degree, I went in to the bank to ask for a £50 extension on my overdraft - I left with a credit card and a loan... That was the start of my debt spiral, funded by HSBC, who every time I maxed out my CC, phoned me to ask if I wanted to pay it off with another loan. This went on for years. Eventually, I did it one last time and I had the willpower to force them to cancel my credit card (no, I didn't want it 'just for emergencies'). At that point, I think I was about £18,000 in debt. For no good reason!

I've worked hard. I now have 4 credit cards. One is Tesco’s and I pay it off each month - I use it to boost my clubcard points. The other three I use to move debt around keeping at 0% whenever I can This is almost 'good' debt though - it's the cost of an evening course I'm doing, to retrain in marketing (what I do now after being made redundant in 2008), so I can progress with my career.

A while back I got a good payout from ppi reclaiming, but that's all gone. As well as I've done to break the cycle - I can't stop spending! If it's there, I spend it!

I still have the remains of that loan to [pay off, I think (without checking) it's at about £8,000 now.

I'm now 31 and still living in a flatshare in London. I hate living with people! To that end I 'have' to have a week's holiday on my own each year just to get away from people. At least this year I'm staying in the country, I've managed to reign myself in this much!

I just don't know how to stop myself from spending, how to concentrate on getting my own place! It just seems such a large amount I'll need (not even taking into account the fact I have the debt to pay off first) that I'll never get there, so take-aways here and there won't make a difference.

I don't know how to get focused and turn my life around (again). I'm looking at the shared home ownership schemes, and it seems so doable in theory.

Please help!!

Travelqueen

Okay

1) As other people will no doubt suggest, can you post an SOA so that people can see where you might be able to make cuts

2) What 'other' debt are you moving between the 3 cards, is this on top of the 10K?

3) Have you done a snowball to try and work out which debt to throw money at 1st?

4) I assume you can't move back in with your parents (horrific thought I know) to try and pay the debt off quicker?

5) In terms of living with people, having been in flatshares for years, both as a rentee and a live-in landlady, I found the little things were most important.
a) clear house rules - cleaning rotas, a bore but saves so many arguments
b) a 'santuary' to call my own - normally my bedroom!
c) trying to work out what nights my housemates would be out so I could luxuriate in having the place to myself - small things...
d) outside space. I lived in various places all over London, some in less than desirable places, and essentially for me if I had a bit of garden to mess around in - tidy, plant stuff, basically make it my own, I was happy. When I didn't it was awful - again, its about making places your 'sanctuary'
e) Can you not get together with friends and houseshare? Would that make it more palatable?

In the end you will need to either reduce spending or up your income, the latter it sounds like you are already working on, but if debts are a priority (and your company allows it) can you get a 2nd job bar tending or something? If you need to reduce your income, then you should try keeping a spending diary (you can even get apps for your phone if you can't wield a pen) and seeing where you could cut back, such as food on the Old Style board.

Nothing is insurmountable, and at least you realise you need to make a change. If it makes you feel any better my debt was beyond insane, but I've paid off just over £25K in the last 3 years by being tougher with myself...

Good luck, and I'm sure someone else will be along soon with better advice!

TakingControl

Totally agree with travelqueen and I am in a similar position, only 8 years your senior and I had at time of my LBM £45K (November 09). I worked hard and live frugal and in a house share too and I am 10 months away from being debt free, finally. This is what keeps me going as I know once I am debt free, if I save what I paid to service my debts for 16 months, I will have a 10% deposit for a house (assuming prizes don't hike too much).

This should be your goal and your motivation. Set yourself a realistic date to be debt free and work towards it.

Good luck

SJ_Jones

1) Will look at this- I have an Excel Budget so should be fairly easy
2) On my Credit card are the payments for my evening course / exam fees / week away this year (I know, I know - but just need the time off after I finish the course, it's my focal point for getting through it all)
3) Yes - Paying off CC first, then when that's gone, will be saving up to pay off loan (can't make additional payments, can only pay off early in full)
4) No - they live way out in the sticks, and my life is in London. Plus I'd be earning less, and although some things will be cheaper, debt repayment won't be.
5) My room really is my sanctuary - I even have a coffee machine in there! We have a cleaner (it's in the contract & it saves arguments! Also, it's a friend who does it so rates are low). I don't have the cheapest room in the world, but I love it! I have a balcony, which gives me a chance to do gardening, and just sit outside. Which helps! And we do have communal gardens, and there are ocks where I fish - it's a nice part of London. I know I could live somewhere else more cheaply, but for the area and the flat it's worth it!

I've done bar work before to pay for holidays, but with my study, I really don't have time at the moment. Plus, I do some voluntary charity work - which helps give me skills I can put on my CV that I don't get through my paid job.

I've recently got a gym membership - but it's cheap with my student discount - and for the first time in my life, I'm actually going! Plus it's another 'out' from people at the flat.

I cook more than I used to, I do enjoy it - again it's just finding the time!

When I was younger, I didn't have the confidence to go for jobs I really wanted, so I'm further down the ladder than I should be for my age. Redundancy really helped me get a career I enjoy though, and once I get my qualification, it should really help things!

One of the biggest problems, is friends with better paid jobs... when we go out, paying for drinks to keep up with them. Although I don't do rounds, it's still hard.

SJ_Jones

Is this what you mean by SOA?

Monthly income- £1,599.24 (This has had Tax, NI, student loan and pension taken off already)

Monthly costs:

Rent - £590
Loan - £214.78
Oyster - £112.20
Council Tax - £40.80
Mobile - £37.50*
Gym - £32
Hair - £30**
Electric - £26
Contact Lenses - £20.75***
National Lottery - £9
TV Licence - £4.85
Landline rental - £3.12
RSPB Charity payment - £3
Internet - £2.50

Groceries - £173.33 (based on £40 a week)
Cleaner - £13.87
Spending £173.33 (based on £40 a week)

Total - £1,487.03

Which (in theory) leaves £112.20.

My issue is being able to stick to this, and preferably improving on it!

* When my contract is up in August, I plan to keep the same phone and haggle this down
** I know I could get this cheaper, but I love the guy who does it - been with him for 4 years, so £60 (at most I often get discounts) for a good haircut in London seems ok!
*** Seems a lot, but I need toric lenses. I can't find anywhere that works out cheaper, once you take into account eye checks. I have a different subscription for each eye which makes it harder online as well!

SJ_Jones

Just double checked and Loan currently stands at just under £8,000.

CC has £2,666 on it - which is more than I thought :eek:

vasseur

You could get the groceries down by at least £10 a week. I manage on less than £40 for 2 of us. That would give you approximately an extra £40 per month.

I know it's a silly question but do you actually use the gym and get your money's worth?

warwicktiger

Your "week in the country", what will it cost you, its not in your SOA.

Have you thought about house sitting, getting paid a little to mind someones house while they are away for a week or two?

SJ_Jones

Groceries is my first aim - I am a bit of a foodie, so love getting the nice stuff... but going to try! I find it works out cheaper (per person) when there's two of you. Singledom is expensive!

I do it online, and so although there's a delivery cost, I can keep track of the amount, and don't get tempted by unnecessary items! Plus, if I do a big shop I'd only get a cab which works out the same price, and they carry it up 3 flights for me!

But will aim for £5 less each week!

The gym is new, and while I don't go every day, at the moment it is working out well. If it dips consistently, I'll cancel it (it's a small gym, so there's no contract).

SJ_Jones

warwicktiger wrote: »

Your "week in the country", what will it cost you, its not in your SOA.

Have you thought about house sitting, getting paid a little to mind someones house while they are away for a week or two?

That's already paid for (part of the cc debt). Aiming to keep expenses there down - using Tesco clubcard rewards for entries, plus my RSPB donation each month gives me access to reserves as well. After that it's my beautiful student discount, and walks on the beach! It's self catering, so food won't be too much either.

electrobix99

You would be amazed at how much skipping a takeaway and putting that on your credit card could make in terms of amount paid back and length of time to clear off.

My boyfriend has £2800 on a Barclay Card and by upping the payment by £10 a month it is going to save £1000 and two years. Google "Credit Card Calculator" and there is a good one on Which.

Small amounts can really make a huge difference.