Have you taken out/would you take out a Prenuptial agreement?

princessdreamer

As I am still fighting to keep my home against an ex who put nothing in and abandoned not only me but our children, I would have on in a heartbeat and hope they d become legal.

anguk

When I was younger I would definitely not have signed a pre-nup and I think I would have walked away from the relationship if asked to sign one because marriage is all about love and trust.

Now I'm much older and wiser and I've seen too many relationships break apart and one of the couple has been cleaned out and is left pennyless. Marriage is still all about love and trust, nobody gets married expecting to divorce some time in the future, everyone gets married thinking it lasts forever, but sadly the truth is many marriages fail for a variety of reasons and I think it's very sensible to protect yourself.

angelil

I got married last year and my now-husband and I seriously considered a pre-nup. We're not stupid and have sadly seen too many marriages fail. We love each other dearly but think you have to protect yourselves against ANYTHING that could go wrong in future. The way we see it, it's like life or car insurance: nobody EXPECTS to die young or have a horrible accident but sadly these things happen occasionally.

As it was, we didn't end up getting a pre-nup, but only because we live, work, pay taxes in and got married in France and we're actually already pretty well protected by the standard laws that exist here.

lostinrates

Prenups are increasingly considered in divorce.

My husband and i have a written agreement. I would have married without it, but it formed an excellent document over which to test compatability of outlook and accord of future planning. I think that the act of thinking about things has actively contributed to the lesser likelyhood of our needing it!

fluffnutter

If you're thinking of getting married and you still view assets as 'yours' or 'theirs' then you're starting from the wrong point straightaway. There is no such thing as 'mine' and 'yours' once you're married; it's 'ours'. If you can't get your head round that, don't get married.

Mojisola

lostinrates wrote: »

Prenups are increasingly considered in divorce.My husband and i have a written agreement. I would have married without it, but it formed an excellent document over which to test cop,patibility of outlook and accord of future planning. I think that the act of thinking about things has actively contributed to the lesser likelyhood of our needing it!

There's a lot of truth here. From a few of the threads on MSE you can see that some couples get married/move into together without ever talking about how things will work and what their attitudes are to money/spending/saving/starting a family or not/etc.

Spendless

Nope. I've been married 13 years this summer and we both owned our own (mortgaged) property at the time we met. There's been too many variants in our financial situation since.

Initially my house was in neg equity whereas hubbys had a small amount of equity (couple of £1000). We sold his place and moved to mine which had a very cheap mortgage so it meant we could save more. Then we became parents less than a year after marriage and childcare would have wiped out how much I earnt, so i worked evenings/w'ends till child 2, when hubby changed jobs. He started climbing a career path, helped by the fact that he could put the hours in cos I could be around for the children in the way no other childcare provider could (other than a live-in nanny-that we couldn't afford).

We'd bought another place when child 2 came along and rented my still in neg equity house out. After a couple of years the tenants moved out and I sold my place for a profit as house prices had now soared.

DH then became ill (Cancer) and I faced the fact I might be on my own. Fortunately it was caught early and he returned to work. I then found a part-time job which suited family life perfectly and with children school age we had the benefits of a 2nd income. Then my employer losts its contract and I lost my job and digging round the attic hubby discovered he had critical life cover on the endowment we were still paying for the property he's owned when we met. It paid out paying off debt and giving us substantial savings. My endowment is still being paid and will eventually pay out something in uner 8 years.

Both of us have fetched either financial gain to the household, in many diff ways in just over a decade/

ognum

My husband and I both started married life with nothing, we are now comfortable and happy that we share what we have made.

If my husband was to die (hope not!) and I was in a new relationship I would certainly tie up my asserts so if I died they went to my children not my new spouse!