Spousal and Child Maintenance

activist3

Mojisola wrote: »

Think seriously about doing this.

What you're suggesting so far sounds very unfair to you.

Yes i will do. I have three children. The only other option is to ask my wife to pay half of the debt with the CCCS as it is all in Joint names and then pay her the child maintenance which effectively pays her half of the debts. But i suppose when the CCCS debt stops in another 4 years then i will still have issues. I am sure she could claim for the 2 of the children and me for one?

Lots of number crunching to be done. To make matters worse this wasnt even my choice but there we are. I am just keen for the children to have the most stability i can offer in sad circumstances.
Hence why i want them to stay in the house etc

fannyanna

Why are you giving her the £20k equity in the house and the furniture and then taking sole responsibility for the £26k debt that I presume is both of yours?

I applaud you for being generous but in the long run you're not helping anyone by boxing yourself into a corner that you'll struggle to get out of.

Yes, you need to be fair. Yes, you need to consider the fact that your ex is going to be the main carer for your children (you having the children 2 days is not shared care - I thought you originally meant 50/50 care) BUT you also need to have a life and need to get by.

I hope you haven't already told your ex your plans. I don't think they are sustainable for you and I think it woudl be unfair to build her hopes up by saying that she can have everything and then change your mind because the reality hits that your actually screwing yourself over.

Sorry - I don't mean to sound harsh but you need to look after yourself but also set your exe's expectations as she needs to think about going forward alone and work out how to do that (just as you are). Sorry again- as that's just come across quite harsh again. Lol I give up :-)

activist3

fannyanna wrote: »

Why are you giving her the £20k equity in the house and the furniture and then taking sole responsibility for the £26k debt that I presume is both of yours?

I applaud you for being generous but in the long run you're not helping anyone by boxing yourself into a corner that you'll struggle to get out of.

Yes, you need to be fair. Yes, you need to consider the fact that your ex is going to be the main carer for your children (you having the children 2 days is not shared care - I thought you originally meant 50/50 care) BUT you also need to have a life and need to get by.

I hope you haven't already told your ex your plans. I don't think they are sustainable for you and I think it woudl be unfair to build her hopes up by saying that she can have everything and then change your mind because the reality hits that your actually screwing yourself over.

Sorry - I don't mean to sound harsh but you need to look after yourself but also set your exe's expectations as she needs to think about going forward alone and work out how to do that (just as you are). Sorry again- as that's just come across quite harsh again. Lol I give up :-)

Thank you and don't worry about soundin harsh, I have thick skin. The reason I was going to give her the house is for the children's benefit. And with a mortgage payment of 450 p/m I thought it unfair to expect her to contribute to the debt as well. I also can't remove things from the house as we dont have two of anything and I am trying to protect the children.


This is going to be far harder than I hoped

Mojisola

activist3 wrote: »

Thank you and don't worry about soundin harsh, I have thick skin. The reason I was going to give her the house is for the children's benefit. And with a mortgage payment of 450 p/m I thought it unfair to expect her to contribute to the debt as well. I also can't remove things from the house as we dont have two of anything and I am trying to protect the children.

The children have a right to keep contact with both parents - that means you have to be in a good enough financial position to provide for them at your place.

Bubby

I think it would be fair if you split the debt, she kept the house for the children's sake and until the debt is repaid she didn't claim child maintenance. Alternatively she could keep the house, take on the debt but claim child maintenance from you.

It is rare to split the furniture now days if you have children as you will be effectively taking from them. I would recommend splitting the equity however £20k isn't worth fighting over as with solicitors fees you could easily lose most of this.

Put the proposal to her, she will in the end have a home for herself and the children with no upheaval.

DS4215

Maybe you could consider taking on the debt, signing the house over to her and as a result go bankrupt. It will wipe out your debts (and your credit history) and might leave you able to carry on. Its not an easy path, but without any assets it is a consideration.

clearingout

fannyanna wrote: »

I wouldn't have thought you'd have to pay child maintenance on the basis of what you've said (you'll have shared care of the children and she will have a higher income than you).

it doesn't work like that. Doesn't matter if the mother has the money of Alan Sugar sitting in her bank account, if she is receiving Child Benefit the CSA would class her as the PWC and the OP would be liable for child maintenance - currently 25% of his earnings after deductions. Yes, there will be a deduction for the number of nights he has the children, but there is still a child maintenance liability.

OP - you need legal advice. You cannot stop the CSA wheels turning. Whatever amicable arrangement you might make now, particularly if she says she won't go to the CSA, you must realise that things can change. And things usually change when a new partner comes on the scene. Even if you get it all written up and legally signed up, a year after the Order is made, she could still go to the CSA.

No, you can't 'offset' in someway by claiming Tax Credits for the time you have the children. Again, Tax Credits will be paid to the parent holding the Child Benefit. As you have three children, you may well be able to take on the Child Benefit for one child but if you are only having them for 2 nights, I would suggest this probably isn't quite fair.

No, it wont' be as easy as you'd hoped. I think you may have to look at sharing the debt. How much is it going to be for you to rent a property big enough to have the children stay over in? can you get away with two beds (children all the same sex or quite young?)?

Dunroamin

I would be careful about keeping the mortgage on joint names - if she hits financial problems or things turn nasty you will be just as liable for the payments as she is.

daska

clearingout wrote: »

it doesn't work like that. Doesn't matter if the mother has the money of Alan Sugar sitting in her bank account, if she is receiving Child Benefit the CSA would class her as the PWC and the OP would be liable for child maintenance - currently 25% of his earnings after deductions. Yes, there will be a deduction for the number of nights he has the children, but there is still a child maintenance liability.

OP - you need legal advice. You cannot stop the CSA wheels turning. Whatever amicable arrangement you might make now, particularly if she says she won't go to the CSA, you must realise that things can change. And things usually change when a new partner comes on the scene. Even if you get it all written up and legally signed up, a year after the Order is made, she could still go to the CSA.

No, you can't 'offset' in someway by claiming Tax Credits for the time you have the children. Again, Tax Credits will be paid to the parent holding the Child Benefit. As you have three children, you may well be able to take on the Child Benefit for one child but if you are only having them for 2 nights, I would suggest this probably isn't quite fair.

No, it wont' be as easy as you'd hoped. I think you may have to look at sharing the debt. How much is it going to be for you to rent a property big enough to have the children stay over in? can you get away with two beds (children all the same sex or quite young?)?

With three children it's not far off being fair. I don't get the feeling this is a dad who will be saying "No, I pay maintenance, you're responsible for all the school uniform."

In principle I love the concept of shared residency but in practice I've seen how easy it is for shared residency to be very difficult for the children - the football kit is always at the wrong house LOL.

Mojisola

clearingout wrote: »

As you have three children, you may well be able to take on the Child Benefit for one child but if you are only having them for 2 nights, I would suggest this probably isn't quite fair.

Three kids x 2 nights v three kids x 5 nights. One third of the CB going to Dad sounds very fair.