IT Support to Friends / Family

tsstss7

My OH sounds very much like you and was happily providing computer support free of charge to everyone at work (he does not work in it but is v. good with computers) until I pointed out to him that they were basically taking the pee. He would spend money driving to their houses and either spend hours there or take boxes home to fix. He explained it away by saying he considered these people to be his friends and didn't like to ask for anything in return.

Anyway I must have touched a nerve because soon after he stopped doing jobs for people who did not show appropriate gratitute (they generally buy him a few beers - he has no going rate as such its more about being appreciated!)

If he doesn't want to do a comp he just says he is busy and he would certainly never do a comp fix for friends of family unless he also knows them very well.

osian

My DH has had this problem in the past. It was always something 'urgent' that needed doing straight away! He doesn't mind helping people so long as it's convenient.

Luckily he's fairly blunt so was able to say when he could help or not and funnily enough the 'urgent' problems stopped.

StumpyPumpy

I wonder if Proctologists have the same problems with their friends?:rotfl:

SP

sfry

I remember this well. I used to spend hour after hour fixing my friends computer when they got viruses, generally messed up and downloaded everything I told them not to, Never had so much as a bottle of wine or box of chocs.


The final straw was when an acquaintance of theirs (who I had never met) bought a computer. Unbeknown to me they told her I would be happy to help her connect it up, get her online and give her computer lessons.


OK fine I said. I will be charging an hourly rate and she will need a lot of hours. Suddenly this person did not need help any more!


Following on from that I started charging my original friends an hourly rate. The requests for help then stopped altogether.

all_change

I would recommend providing a copy of this cartoon flow chart ("Tech support cheat sheet"):

http://xkcd.com/627/

Less subtlety may be required, depending on the person...

bratz81

gosh I get this a lot too. Work in IT and apparently this means I can fix not only computers but phones, televisions, dvd players and basically anything with a plug. Yes, according to my family my degree is a BEng Anything with a Plug Science.

I used to be phoned constantly, I didn't mind doing it now and again at all but it was getting out of control. I then started charging for petrol etc which weeded out some people. But it got out of hand when I was doing work for a friend of dad's. Set him up a laptop, installed his broadband etc. Now the laptop wasn't wireless so i explained you needed the modem plugged in to get online. Well he phoned at 3am one weekday and said his internet wasn't working - modem not plugged in.

I went mental - had to get up for work the next day obviously and from then on anyone who asked was told no way!

Gigglepig

Why not just tell your family exactly what you are happy to do and what you are not. For example along the lines of:

"... Dad, I'm really happy to help you, mum & siblings but I am not going to help non-family members with their IT issues. I'm working full time with IT problems and really need a break from it on weekends. For family I will try to help when I can, but I am often busy, so it may take a couple of weeks to get around to it. I just wanted to make this clear to avoid any misunderstandings and disappointment...'

sassyblue

foxtrot_mike wrote: »

When this happens feel i dont want to help, part of the problem perhaps is that I have a problem saying no, as I said im the sort of person that wants to help.

Im really not sure what to say any more.

Say NO!!

It's hard though isn't it? I'm the same, l help my mum and dad with lots of things and whilst they're grateful with a busy job and a young family it can be too much for me, especially when they've told their friends l can help them.... :eek: they mean well but l think people forget how busy life is when they retire.

I have said no alot since my son was born though and most people understand - and if they didn't l won't lose sleep and they won't be anyone l help out in the future.

Ring your dad tonight and say 'sorry l think you're going to have to tell your friend l can't help him out l've got too much on' (make something up if needs be) if he gets ar5ey just say 'well dad l didn't offer to help l have more than enough on, here's the number of someone who is reasonable and would help'.

Make sure YOU ring your dad you'll feel more in control of the conversation.

grimsalve

Just make a complete mess of it so they have to pay someone to fix it... they won't bother you again

TBH, I don't mind helping my friends and family out but it's always "best endeavours" and I do warn them that there's no warranty with any of my work and I do tend to bluff and bodge my way through things (not really much different from my day job).

geekgirl

I have this a lot as well. I will help family and close friends with no problem. I do get extended family and other friends expect help as well but I have now got really good at telling them I will either fit it in when I am ready or they can pay my usual charges of £35 an hour and have it done that week. It sorts them out, they never hassle me and they usually ask another friend of theirs to sort it out quickly and for free.