Need to rant!

tea_lover

Apologies in advance for the rant - if I don't vent here then I am going to send some seriously inadvisable texts so this is going to have to be my safety valve for now!

I joined a local charity fundraising group last year. There's only 3 of us, and one of the people doesn't ever answer calls etc (just turns up on the day) so it's basically two of us. The problem is that I'm now at breaking point with this other person (A).

I've somehow got stuck with organising a spring fair. It's difficult to fit in as I'm working 40+ hrs a week, plus I'm at college and revising for exams. A works 1.5hrs a day, has a cleaner, etc. I'm doing my best with it, and tbh thought it was going ok. We had a meeting last night and this morning I keep getting texts saying how when A organised a christmas fair all the stalls were booked by now, and the posters had gone up by now, and how half the stallholders would let me down so I need to get on with things.

The tone of the texts, and the tone at last night's meeting, is just so patronising. I'm putting loads of effort into this, and using what tiny bit of free time I have, and nothing is ever good enough.

I'm very tempted to reply and tell her to stick it, that if she's so flaming marvellous she can do the whole lot herself. I just want to get it out of the way so I can leave the group and forget about it. Part of me is so tempted to walk away now, but I want to do the fair first so I don't feel like I've let people down.

But I'm not sure I can last till the middle of March without telling A just to f off!

See - there was no real point to this, just needed to let off steam. Although if anyone has any advice for how to get through the next couple of months without resorting to violence that would be great!

gingin_2

I would say, in a calm but firm voice "A, I am doing my best, if it's not good enough then please feel free to take over" and walk away. Don't lose your temper or appear weak as that could be used as ammo against you!

It's good to vent anonymously sometimes!

view

As politely to the point of being condescending yourself, say to her that you really feel you could never do as well as she did last year and therefore you wil handover everything to her very capable hands.

who cares if she muddies your name, you owe nothing to anyone.

just give her the file of everything you have done, hand it to her and walk away whistling

Lotus-eater

gingin wrote: »

I would say, in a calm but firm voice "A, I am doing my best, if it's not good enough then please feel free to take over" and walk away. Don't lose your temper or appear weak as that could be used as ammo against you!

It's good to vent anonymously sometimes!

GoldenJill wrote: »

As politely to the point of being condescending yourself, say to her that you really feel you could never do as well as she did last year and therefore you wil handover everything to her very capable hands.

who cares if she muddies your name, you owe nothing to anyone.

just give her the file of everything you have done, hand it to her and walk away whistling

Either of those

tea_lover

Thanks for the replies. Sometimes an anonymous rant does the world of good.:D

Am going for the 'ignore completely' approach today. Hopefully she'll get the hint and stop texting me about how brilliant she is.

Lotus-eater

tea_lover wrote: »

Thanks for the replies. Sometimes an anonymous rant does the world of good.:D

Am going for the 'ignore completely' approach today. Hopefully she'll get the hint and stop texting me about how brilliant she is.

She won't, you can't continue to ignore it.

gingin_2

Lotus-eater wrote: »

She won't, you can't continue to ignore it.

Wot he says :cool:

tea_lover

Lotus-eater wrote: »

She won't, you can't continue to ignore it.

D*mn you, with your voice of reason!

Sadly you're right, she is a complete PITA. I'm using the same approach I would with bullies - don't let her see she's getting to me.

gingin_2

tea_lover wrote: »

D*mn you, with your voice of reason!

Sadly you're right, she is a complete PITA. I'm using the same approach I would with bullies - don't let her see she's getting to me.

But it's probably in her nature and she doesn't realise she is doing it, that's why you need to be forthright with her. Stand up for yourself!

Treed

If your really struggling then have her sort certain aspects of the fair.
After all (A) is brilliant

tea_lover

Treed wrote: »

If your really struggling then have her sort certain aspects of the fair.
After all (A) is brilliant

Well this is true... in fact, as well as the whole fair, she could probably do a far better job at my work as well. She can have the lot! :rotfl: