2nd DNA test, Mother pulled out of 1st

katz03

woody27 wrote: »

Hey everyone,
I was asked earlier on to keep you updated; So here it is....

The childs mother dropped the claim again. Through xmas & New year we heard nothing. I won't go into too much detail but the stress it placed us under caused personal heartache in a different way. I will pay that price for a long time to come.

The point is, we recieved a letter 20th January, Saying case closed again. Reasons due to mother cancelling the claim on 1st December; How this is possible I just dn't know. Considering they didn;t call till after this date to say it had been opened.

So hey, yet again we still don't know the truth. I'm furious & relieved at the same time.

How can she do this to her child, If she is so sure it's my Husbands?
Why would she cancel if she is so sure?

Big question now is can it be opened a third time around?????

Thank you to all for your advise & comments!!

My guess is that was her intention - she just wants to make life tough for you - dont let her *hug*

clearingout

HI Woody,
thanks for getting back to us. You are indeed between a rock and a hard place with this. Like Prelude, I believe that this will happen again and again and there won't be much you can do about it. I would suggest to your husband that he files away the paperwork somewhere safe (I suspect all us regulars here have CSA files hidden in the back of wardrobes!) and that it is marked 'do not throw away under any circumstances'. He may need it in the future if the adult child turns up on the doorstep wanting to know why he hasn't bothered with her.

Don't let this affect your relationship - it's not about you and your husband. It's about some daft woman who can't get her act together because she's terrified of the outcome and what that means. Sooner or later, she'll have to go ahead with it if she wants the money. And money is the motivator at the end of the day.

mspa

Can you not take legal action against her? Surely this is harrassment! Is there nothing that can be done legally to find out if you are the father without the csa?

romanempire

Certainly looks like harassment to me. And if it was a male NRP we'd be deafened by the outrage. :eek:

To the OP:- If it happens a third time I'd strongly suggest getting legal advice and getting it in front of a judge. Where the ex is instructed by the judge to either go through with the test or be subject to an injunction to desist from further harassment. Because it looks to me like the CSA will happily continue in its role as the bitter ex's revenge tool.

R.

clearingout

romanempire wrote: »

. Because it looks to me like the CSA will happily continue in its role as the bitter ex's revenge tool.

R.

I think that's a bit over the top - the CSA are doing their job, nothing more. Someone phones up asking for a case to be opened. They open case and contact 'dad'. Dad denies paternity. Paperwork sent out. Mum closes case.

I 100% agree it is wrong she's getting away with doing this multiple times but it's not the CSA's fault.

kevin137

PreludeForTimeFeelers wrote: »

To people saying that the NRP only gets one chance to deny paternity, this is true, one time per case - this PWC has opened separate cases.

1stly, to the OP, well done for hanging in there, this can add so much stress to a relationship after the split from the ex of the children, 2ndly, make dam sure you keep ALL paperwork, in a file, in dated order with notes on the front of each paperwork so as to find anything easily and quickly in the future...

To Prelude, i understand the reasoning for your answer, but it has become apparent, that the CSA clearly use different descriptions for different things, and has been popping up time and time again recently, it was my understanding that they don't "close" cases, they suspend them... Which is it, can a case only be closed if there was never a case to close, or can it be closed and wipe any arrears, or something else entirely...?

I am not having a go, but from the logic explained to people by some csa staff, this should not be able to happen, and again, this is harassment by using a 3rd party, causing untold physical and emotional stress to not only the NRP but also to his new family....

To me, as an outsider who does not know the full story, just the basics of this issue seem to be to cause as much trouble to the NRP as possible, maybe not with money, but there are many ways to seek revenge, and this is certainly the most cruel and vicious that i have seen for a long time...!!!

NOW for my answer to this.... Seeking an injunction is clearly one way you could go, however, this is expensive and time consuming, so i would try and go a different way...

Does your partner say that he wants to support the child should it be his...??? If the answer is yes, then HE can open a claim, and ask for DNA testing to prove the child is his, if this is taken up on, and the child is proved his, then he will be paying for a long time, and rightly so...! However, if she denies the test, this will in effect be the same thing as if an NRP denies a test, 1 chance, doesn't matter in my eyes what the reasoning is, but if she denies a test, there is no proved paternity, and in theory she will not be able to dispute in the future, and your husband can close the case...!

You may want to try and talk to a solicitor 1st, but it makes sense in my mind, and the CSA would have to look at the claims in the future as being a denied paternity so refuse to open a case on her behalf....

Any thoughts from anyone else about how this would work would be of great interest...

PreludeForTimeFeelers

The CSA won't give the NRP a DNA test if he's the one who has opened the case - by opening a case he is accepting paternity, so don't go down this route!

Kevin, the CSA can close any case at the request of the person who opened the case, however it will only be fully closed if there are no monies outstanding. In these situations the ongoing liability will stop and the case will be 'open but withdrawn', and the debts will be suspended. Suspended debt can be reinstated at any time. This is a legal thing - the CSA don't have the power to wipe out arrears, they can only suspend them. Even if a PWC withdraws her case and says she doesn't want the money that is owed, there isn't any supporting legislation to allow the Csa to wipe this out and fully close the case. Hopefully this is in the process of changing, once the MPs pull their collective fingers out. In the meantime, the only arrears Csa can wipe out are those that the PWC says she has received.

kevin137

Thanks for clearing that up... So if anyone receives a letter saying case close, account balance zero, then it really is closed, anything else is a lie...

Double standards as far as the NRP not being able to ask for a case to be opened and ask for paternity to be proved in my opinion, and again, while this may be policy, is probably breaking the law somewhere down the line for "sexism" although i doubt that this was intended when they came into existence, it appears that it may be that now... Shame it does;t help this poor family in these circumstances, they are left hanging and not knowing if the NRP is in fact the father and this horrible woman can keep coming back any time...!

I would be inclined to apply to court a a court order to find out once and for all if it was me....!!!

PreludeForTimeFeelers

kevin137 wrote: »

Thanks for clearing that up... So if anyone receives a letter saying case close, account balance zero, then it really is closed, anything else is a lie...

Double standards as far as the NRP not being able to ask for a case to be opened and ask for paternity to be proved in my opinion, and again, while this may be policy, is probably breaking the law somewhere down the line for "sexism" although i doubt that this was intended when they came into existence, it appears that it may be that now... Shame it does;t help this poor family in these circumstances, they are left hanging and not knowing if the NRP is in fact the father and this horrible woman can keep coming back any time...!

I would be inclined to apply to court a a court order to find out once and for all if it was me....!!!

It's not double standards though, a PWC wouldn't be allowed to open a case and ask for a paternity test, part of the application is that you name the other party - she couldn't name someone and say "But I don't know if he's the dad, I want a DNA test", she'd be politely told that the CSA aren't there to arrange DNA tests, the onus is on the PWC to name the father, and then for the NRP to either say yes he is or no he isn't.

The applicant, be it NRP or PWC, has to be confident that both parties in the case are the parents.

kevin137

Fair enough, but it is double standards to allow a PWC to keep opening and closing a case without the DNA evidence, and that is far more wrong and hurtful...