Looking after spare cash in a care home

spaghetti_monster

Hi there,
Just had a quick question as my FIL will be moving into a care home next week.

He's in the regular part of the home (not the nursing part), but (according to their criteria) needs maximum help and attention. He can already be quite hard to get through to and has also been diagnosed with the beginnings of dementia.

One thing we're wondering how to handle is his spare cash/ pocket money. He won't really need much now - just for ciggies, very basic groceries (coffee, biscuits, bread).
Over the last weeks he's lost his wallet several times (it was always in the house somewhere). The last time there was €600 in there - he thinks that's a normal amount to carry around for popping to the shops.

He was always a bit like this, but a neighbour just told us that FIL asked him to buy 3 light bulbs for him - and then tried to give him €150 for them.

Does anybody have any advice how we could handle the situation? We want him to be free to use his money how he wants, but want to try and limit the amount he has on him at any one time.

Errata

The home will have a policy and procedure for keeping residents cash safely. Why on earth does he need to use his own money to buy coffee and bread?

spaghetti_monster

I've been thinking that the home must have provision for this situation, so I'll get OH to ask.

Although he gets 3 meals a day he has a small fridge/ kitchen worktop thing in his room where he could make coffee and snacks. The home has it's own shop and I think he'd like to have a few of his own (foodie) things in his own room.

davenport151

Hi Spaghetti Monster.
As Errata said most homes have some sort of policy. I work as an administrator in a residential one and we keep money in the safe for each resident. The amount is logged and each expenditure is listed and signed for. We dont encourage them to keep money on them (except perhaps a few pounds in change) as money has been know to go missing - disgusting I know. This home may have a similar system especially as they have a shop.

blossomhill_2

spaghetti_monster wrote: »

Although he gets 3 meals a day he has a small fridge/ kitchen worktop thing in his room where he could make coffee and snacks. The home has it's own shop and I think he'd like to have a few of his own (foodie) things in his own room.

Wow that sounds like a great set-up, loosing control of things like money and shopping can be quite demoralising for older people

If you plan to visit quite often, I'd plan to keep his wallet topped up to a set amount, say £20, and if it goes missing just write it off as the cost of keeping him in control of his own affairs. I know that may sound like a contradiction (as having it nicked woudl be out of his control) but you could otherwise button up his affairs so tight that they are just about controlling money rather than giving him a reasonable life, and it doesn't sound like you'd want that.

My late uncle would only carry £20 notes in his wallet so he always knew what he'd given the assistant or taxi driver. He would put the change in his pocket and into a drawer when he got home and I would change it up into £20 notes again.

It worked well for him, I suggested tenners instead but he didn't like to feel he was short of cash.

I hope things work out well for him