Housing Benefit Changes - I need help!

NightSprite

Hi there. Sorry that my first post on this forum is a cry for help/advice! But for now I'm not sure the path to take.

A little back history to help things along.

I am 30 years old, I am single and I am unemployed. I live in the London Borough of Enfield and I rent privately. I currently reside in a one bedroom self contained flat in a converted house.

Like many others like myself the proposed changes to the LHA will see my rent cut to that equalling a shared accommodation allowance!

I can't share a house!!

Sorry for the yelling, I should explain and this is where I have to get truly open with you.

I am a transsexual. MtF. On hormones and currently seeing specialists to help progress the changes. My home has become my sanctuary! I had to move last year into my current flat after I told my old landlord about my name changes. In a shared house, I would feel unsafe and uncertain. I would have to make sure that I present correctly before leaving my room. I wouldn't feel like I could relax.

I also rather suspect I have Aspergers to a degree, and with it a form of OCD.Trying to share a home with other people would seriously affect my moods and bouts of depression. I manage my symptoms and condition by the fact that I live alone and control my diet. It is my measure of control and my balance, a refuge if you please.
At the start of the above I stated "rather suspect I have Aspergers", well that's because I came to the diagnosis late in life. When I went to pursue the diagnosis with a concrete medical back-up my request was denied by the PCT. They decided to pursue my trans request based on the fact that I was managing with the symptoms of Aspergers and that a formal diagnosis would have no bearing in my future!

Saying that though, I have found it hard to find work. I am not a people person. I do not get on well with others over long periods of time which is why I am unemployed! Management do not like to be yelled at in a sarky way, apparently! Whilst I am blessed with good customer service skills I can not deal with the irate customers. I have only just found, in the past year, the confidence to stride for full time employment again. Based on my past experiences, I have chosen to limit my options. I have decided to step away from my old career choices as well because they played up to a "masculine stereotype". I know that phrase may offend in this day and age of equality but it's important to me in how I present myself! Sadly, the one thing I can think where I might suit my new choices is as an office assistant. I am sadly lacking in imagination here!! It's just that offices seem so gender neutral!


I'm sorry, I've prattled on too much! I don't know what to do. I don't want to have to move again. I have my possessions, which I know I'd have to abandon. I had to eject so much stuff after the last move. I have a small cockatiel, that equally drives me insane and keeps me content. I don't know what to do with him. He's already a rescued bird and suffered so much.

And I have two years of a three tenancy agreement left. I worry that if I am unable to complete the agreement I'll find myself at the mercy the "you made yourself homeless" rule and also still end up having to pay the landlord.

I was just starting to find happiness, a job would have sealed the deal and now it feels like I'm losing control again. I'm scared!

neverdespairgirl

NightSprite wrote: »

Based on my past experiences, I have chosen to limit my options. I have decided to step away from my old career choices as well because they played up to a "masculine stereotype". I know that phrase may offend in this day and age of equality but it's important to me in how I present myself! Sadly, the one thing I can think where I might suit my new choices is as an office assistant. I am sadly lacking in imagination here!! It's just that offices seem so gender neutral!

I think that's a great shame. A woman can work in any job and be perfectly feminine and womanly. You shouldn't feel restricted by your change in gender.

I'm a barrister - typically a male preserve. A mate of mine is a structural engineer, and that's a very male occupation. But neither of us is at all unsuited for our jobs.

Embrace the whole world as a women, don't restrict yourself because of your gender.

NightSprite

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

Embrace the whole world as a women, don't restrict yourself because of your gender.

I know, I am ashamed when I admit my reasonings but I don't what else to say. I usually confound the issue when I say women can do a typically male role because of them being women. I just feel that if I work in warehousing again I'll be singled out as the confused male pretending to be a women.
I use to enjoy working in warehouses! Very little interaction, no customers and usually a set routine!

I don't know. I seem to have no direction any more!

MrsManda

I'm sorry I don't know much about the process of changing gender as the few friends I have who are transexual are not at that stage so if I get something wrong I apologise.
Do you have counselling as part of your treatment? If you do then it sounds from your post that you need to speak to your counsellor about your fears and worries so that they can help you become more confident in your life as a woman. If you do not have counselling I suggest you ask your doctors to refer you to one.

Do you attend any support groups for transexuals? You are not the only one who has these fears and stresses and it could be of great help to know you are not alone. I know you say you're not good around people but isolating yourself further is not good for your mental health and wellbeing. It may feel like a huge step to go to a group but I'm sure it'd be of help to you. You could ask your counsellor to recommend somewhere they think you'd feel safe.

In terms of housing benefit changes you can continue to stay in self-contained accommodation though your benefit payment will be cut. It may be worth going through a budgetting exercise to see what the difference between the shared accommodation rate for your area and your current rent and seeing if you can use your other money to fund the difference.

NightSprite

I have a small network of friends that I tend to see as regularly as possible. But I have never been an overly social person. I don't choose to isolate myself based on my trans status, I just prefer my own company.

As for counselling. Well, I see my specialist every couple of months but I'm not sure that's counselling. As for group counselling, see above paragraph. I don't mind communication in this media but face to face I tend to feel "on rocky ground"!

The only piece of the puzzle in my confidence is in finding a job!

As for my budget in Enfield, I would never find the funds. Shared accommodation in Enfield is just under half of a single bedroom occupancy! Not even my JSA would cover the shortfall!

Oldernotwiser

There are interim payments but I doubt that they will be for 2 years.

dseventy

NightSprite wrote: »

Hi there. Sorry that my first post on this forum is a cry for help/advice! But for now I'm not sure the path to take.

A little back history to help things along.

I am 30 years old, I am single and I am unemployed. I live in the London Borough of Enfield and I rent privately. I currently reside in a one bedroom self contained flat in a converted house.

Like many others like myself the proposed changes to the LHA will see my rent cut to that equalling a shared accommodation allowance!

I can't share a house!!

Sorry for the yelling, I should explain and this is where I have to get truly open with you.

I am a transsexual. MtF. On hormones and currently seeing specialists to help progress the changes. My home has become my sanctuary! I had to move last year into my current flat after I told my old landlord about my name changes. In a shared house, I would feel unsafe and uncertain. I would have to make sure that I present correctly before leaving my room. I wouldn't feel like I could relax.

I also rather suspect I have Aspergers to a degree, and with it a form of OCD.Trying to share a home with other people would seriously affect my moods and bouts of depression. I manage my symptoms and condition by the fact that I live alone and control my diet. It is my measure of control and my balance, a refuge if you please.
At the start of the above I stated "rather suspect I have Aspergers", well that's because I came to the diagnosis late in life. When I went to pursue the diagnosis with a concrete medical back-up my request was denied by the PCT. They decided to pursue my trans request based on the fact that I was managing with the symptoms of Aspergers and that a formal diagnosis would have no bearing in my future!

Saying that though, I have found it hard to find work. I am not a people person. I do not get on well with others over long periods of time which is why I am unemployed! Management do not like to be yelled at in a sarky way, apparently! Whilst I am blessed with good customer service skills I can not deal with the irate customers. I have only just found, in the past year, the confidence to stride for full time employment again. Based on my past experiences, I have chosen to limit my options. I have decided to step away from my old career choices as well because they played up to a "masculine stereotype". I know that phrase may offend in this day and age of equality but it's important to me in how I present myself! Sadly, the one thing I can think where I might suit my new choices is as an office assistant. I am sadly lacking in imagination here!! It's just that offices seem so gender neutral!


I'm sorry, I've prattled on too much! I don't know what to do. I don't want to have to move again. I have my possessions, which I know I'd have to abandon. I had to eject so much stuff after the last move. I have a small cockatiel, that equally drives me insane and keeps me content. I don't know what to do with him. He's already a rescued bird and suffered so much.

And I have two years of a three tenancy agreement left. I worry that if I am unable to complete the agreement I'll find myself at the mercy the "you made yourself homeless" rule and also still end up having to pay the landlord.

I was just starting to find happiness, a job would have sealed the deal and now it feels like I'm losing control again. I'm scared!

You sound like you need the freedom to choose your own place, live on your own and address your own needs.

Unfortunaly you can't achieve these whilst you require the state to intervene in your life (by paying your rent, JSA, council tax etc).

By asking the state to intervene in your life, it means abiding by their rules and dealing with changes in benefit policy, legislation etc.

The only way to truly be independant to make the life choices you want is to pay your own way, then YOU can make the choices about where and how you live.

I suggest you get over the issues to employment, discard the gender issues (despite your personal circs) and get a job. That way YOU control your living circs and how you live.

While you rely on the state intervention, you can't live how you want to, the benefit system is not designed to deal with individual circs like yours, rather the masses.

HTH

D70

londonbabe73

I suggest that you move to a studio flat within the lha limit , it's not ideal but as previously stated if you expect the tax payer to fund you then unfortunately you will have to compromise.

You could also try to claim a dhp housing payment but it would only be a short term stop gap of 6/12 months but it might be enough time for you to get organised

To be fair there will be loads of people who all have valid reasons why they shouldn't be included in the cuts but the only way to have choice in this life is to pay for it yourself.