Help needed

glen5213

My wife has just informed me she wants a divorce
we have 2 children a home the problem with our marriage has been the constant involvement of my mother in law and brother in law i am scared shitless i am gonna lose my home my children everything anybody got any ideas or suggestions on what i should do
all advice greatly appreciated

Gillyx

Go and see a solicitor, you will get half an hour free consultation.

PinkLipgloss

Do you think that she wants a divorce as she has had enough of the MIL/BIL issues - or do you think the marriage has died?

If you want to salvage your marriage how about suggesting a session with RELATE?

glen5213

it is her mother and her brother i have had enough of them

make_me_wise

How did she inform you of her decision? I dont mean tell us word for word obviously. Was it raised in the middle of a row and blurted out or did she approach you calmly and just say that she thinks it is over and wants a divorce.

I ask this because her approach to it all can give you signs as to whether your marriage can be saved. From your post I get the impression that this has come out of the blue and you are shell shocked. As most of us would be when given that kind of bombshell.

It is incredibly easy for me to say this but the best advice I can give is stay incredibly calm. Dont go into panic about losing your home, your children etc. If you want your family to stay together you are going to have to convince her that this is what matters to you above everything else.

When you feel calm enough and think she is calm say that you want to do whatever it takes to get through this and come out the other side as a family unit. Get her to talk to you and listen. See if she will listen to you and take your feelings on board.

In a good relationship there are the foundations laid that will allow for this even when you are riding out a storm.

I wish you the best of luck OP.

glen5213

we have been together 13 years and married for 6 the whole problem is the mother in law and brother in law

PinkLipgloss

If the issues lie out with your marriage (with the MIL and BIL) then surely they can be resolved? It may involve some give and take but in order to save your marriage surely it must be worth it?

make_me_wise

What have the MIL and BIL been doing?

CH27

See a solicitor ASAP.
Ask your wife if she will consider going to Relate with you.

clearingout

Just hang on in there for a few days and let the dust settle. If she's serious, then you will need legal advice. In the meantime, don't do anything rash, don't do anything which could be perceived to be aggressive or abusive (even raising your voice could cause you problems) or you'll find yourself with the Police on your doorstep and accusations of abuse and harassment will follow. This is not what you need.

It doesn't necessarily follow that you will lose everything. Keep your head and get advice. Try https://www.wikivorce.com as a starting point.

jaqui59

Do you also want the divorce?