what next????

jem132

Thanks for reading this maybe long

To cut a long story short . I met and amrried a man who owns his own house on my councle estate he moved in with me while his dd who is 20 lived in his house she paid no rent ect he was in a good job erning good money but was made redudent and i had to go out to work for us to live while she got a brand new car and went on lots of holidays he then got another job so i left work to care for the kids ... 3 weeks ago he decided we could not afford to run both homes so asked dd to move out he found her some where else to live ( he has been asking her for 3 years to pay something ,get a lodger ect but she just cryed and said she would but it never happend) she has now moved out and the sister has called me all the names under the sun like its all my falt i feel really bad his mum and dad arnt talking to us . i wish things would of been different but i could do nothing so now i have given up my councle house and moved into his house wich the boiler has broken down so no hot water and centrel heating our car has just died hopefully can be fixed we have only had it 2 weeks my cooker wouldent fit . I just feel maybe it wasent ment to be ....

Sorry for the rant

VfM4meplse

Poor you....but you did marry, for better or worse. It's funny how everything seems to go wrong at the same time but things will improve, hold each other's hands through it and work on things together as a team.

Good luck.

make_me_wise

jem132 wrote: »

he moved in with me while his dd who is 20 lived in his house she paid no rent ect

3 weeks ago he decided we could not afford to run both homes so asked dd to move out he found her some where else to live ( he has been asking her for 3 years to pay something ,get a lodger ect but she just cryed and said she would but it never happend) she has now moved out and the sister has called me all the names under the sun like its all my falt i feel really bad his mum and dad arnt talking to us

His mum and dad aren't talking to you and his other daughter is acting like some rude bint, all because you asked a 20 year old to pay her way. For gawd sake how long did they expect you to sub this lazy oink.

Talk about cant choose your relatives. Be glad of the peace of them ignoring you. Sort the boiler and the car and get on with a quiet existence doing what you want whilst not subbing some spoilt brat who is old enough to look after herself.

Janey3

Don't let the beggars grind you down.

DD has had a good run for her money (or more like, yours and OH's money)whilst you should be proud that you have supported your partner through thick and thin.

Enjoy your home and put your stamp on it and tell the others to walk on. The car and broken boiler will sort themselves out - these things happen to the best of us.

cavework

Oh love .. it was meant to be, you met and married and are still together despite everything.
Hold your head up and refuse to be insulted or intimidated by people who are only accidentally related to you through marriage.
Tell the ADULT DD and her sister to grow up.
As for the inlaws?
Perhaps they would let their 'poor' Grand daughter move in with them if they are so concerned about her wellfare.

jem132

Thank you all so much for your advise and support .
hiya thats exactly where she is her grans . My oh asked his singel bro if she could live with him they get on really well she said she wont live there.

My mother in law has rang today to say we are not giving presants this year the whole famiely just cards . She knows full well i have bought and wrapped all prezants as she told me what to buy her plus she has taken the gifts i bought for other ohs nices as they live in london . (so will i be getting them back ) :mad::mad:

January20

jem132 wrote: »

Thank you all so much for your advise and support .
hiya thats exactly where she is her grans . My oh asked his singel bro if she could live with him they get on really well she said she wont live there.

My mother in law has rang today to say we are not giving presants this year the whole famiely just cards . She knows full well i have bought and wrapped all prezants as she told me what to buy her plus she has taken the gifts i bought for other ohs nices as they live in london . (so will i be getting them back ) :mad::mad:

I think you need to stop for a moment, take a deep breath and have a cuppa, read what you have written and think about it properly:

1. Your OH's dd is 20 and she is behaving like a spoiled little girl. At her age, it is high time she learned about responsibility ie paying her own rent and certainly her own way.

2. Yours in-laws are not talking to you? Well so be it! If they want to behave like children you don't need them in your life! If they say that they are not doing presents, fine. Return the presents you have bought, sell them on Ebay or give them a charity. They are playing silly games and are trying to hold you to ransom!

What is your OH saying about the situation? Really, if anyone is to blame it is him for not being firmer with his dd, not getting her to pay rent and not forcing her to take in a lodger. He should also have the balls to stand up to his other dd and to his parents and protect you.

Once your emotions settle down a little, you will see things a bit more clearly and things won't look so bad. Just look after yourself and your own children and let the rest of them to their silly little arguments!

cavework

Time for OH to big up
He needs to tell the rest of the family he married you and if thats a problem .. 'jog on'