Wanting baby but cant afford one :-(

julie2011

Hello
My husband and I do not have any children and would really love to before its too late, but I'm in debt and it doesnt look like any time soon that I will be able to clear it.

We are having arguments because of it. I feel its all my fault. We really want a child but dont know what to do for the best.

I cant see how we would be able to afford to live off one wage.

Any guidance would be great

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Household Information[/b]
Number of adults in household........... 1
Number of children in household......... 0
Number of cars owned.................... 1
Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1280
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 1280
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 300
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 0
Electricity............................. 33
Gas..................................... 33
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 11
Telephone (land line)................... 40
Mobile phone............................ 10
TV Licence.............................. 12.54
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 0
Groceries etc. ......................... 150
Clothing................................ 5
Petrol/diesel........................... 150
Road tax................................ 17.67
Car Insurance........................... 33
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 12.5
Car parking............................. 5
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 10
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 18
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 16.61
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 29.17
Haircuts................................ 1
Entertainment........................... 40
Holiday................................. 25
Emergency fund.......................... 20
Total monthly expenses.................. 972.49

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 2000
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 2000

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Credit Card 1..................4718......140.......26.9
Credit Card 2..................4000......99........23.6
Loan...........................7000......230.......0
Total unsecured debts..........15718.....469.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,280
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 972.49
Available for debt repayments........... 307.51
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 469
Amount short for making debt repayments. -161.49
Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 2,000
Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -15,718
Net Assets.............................. -13,718
Created using the SOA calculator at
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using IE browser.[/font]

Mikazaru

julie2011 wrote: »

Hello
My husband and I do not have any children and would really love to before its too late, but I'm in debt and it doesnt look like any time soon that I will be able to clear it.

We are having arguments because of it. I feel its all my fault. We really want a child but dont know what to do for the best.

I cant see how we would be able to afford to live off one wage.

Any guidance would be great

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Household Information[/b]
Number of adults in household........... 1
Number of children in household......... 0
Number of cars owned.................... 1
Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1280
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 1280
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 300
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 0 No council tax?
Electricity............................. 33
Gas..................................... 33
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 11
Telephone (land line)................... 40 Seems high, do you get any free calls?
Mobile phone............................ 10
TV Licence.............................. 12.54
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 0
Groceries etc. ......................... 150
Clothing................................ 5
Petrol/diesel........................... 150
Road tax................................ 17.67
Car Insurance........................... 33
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 12.5
Car parking............................. 5
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 10
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 18
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 16.61 Seems high just for contents insurance.
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 29.17 This is high, could be cut.
Haircuts................................ 1
Entertainment........................... 40
Holiday................................. 25
Emergency fund.......................... 20
Total monthly expenses.................. 972.49

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 2000
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 2000

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Credit Card 1..................4718......140.......26.9
Credit Card 2..................4000......99........23.6
Loan...........................7000......230.......0
Total unsecured debts..........15718.....469.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,280
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 972.49
Available for debt repayments........... 307.51
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 469
Amount short for making debt repayments. -161.49
Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 2,000
Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -15,718
Net Assets.............................. -13,718
Created using the SOA calculator at
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using IE browser.[/font]

Is this your SOA as it would be if you had a child and gave up work? If so, post one up as the situation is now, there are some comments above.
Can you get a 0% card to transfer too?

Tixy

Hi Julie

Do you keep your finances seperate at the moment?
Is the below SoA just your share of the household costs? Does OH also pay the same amount as you for rent, utiltiies etc? As you've only put one adult I assume he pays similar himself? Does he earn a similar amount to you?

julie2011 wrote: »

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Household Information[/b]
Number of adults in household........... 1
Number of children in household......... 0
Number of cars owned.................... 1
Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1280 anyway you coudl increase this in the short term? overtime or a second job just to help you pay down your debts?
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 1280
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 300 is it £600 in total? is that reasonable for your area? could you find cheaper nearby?
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 0
Electricity............................. 33 if this is half the cost and OH also pays the same then it looks high, have you tried shopping around for cheaper suppliers or a better tariff?
Gas..................................... 33
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 11
Telephone (land line)................... 40 this looks quite high, does it include broadband? again it might be worth shopping around to see if ou can find cheaper
Mobile phone............................ 10
TV Licence.............................. 12.54
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 0
Groceries etc. ......................... 150 is this for you both or just a half share?
Clothing................................ 5
Petrol/diesel........................... 150 is this all essential mileage? do you drive 'fuel efficently' and fill up at the cheapest places?
Road tax................................ 17.67
Car Insurance........................... 33
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 12.5
Car parking............................. 5
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 10
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 18
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 16.61
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 29.17
Haircuts................................ 1
Entertainment........................... 40
Holiday................................. 25 have you got one booked? if not consider going without for a year or 2 until debts are paid.
Emergency fund.......................... 20 have you actually got anything saved here?
Total monthly expenses.................. 972.49

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 2000
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 2000

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Credit Card 1..................4718......140.......26.9
Credit Card 2..................4000......99........23.6
Loan...........................7000......230.......0
Total unsecured debts..........15718.....469.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,280
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 972.49
Available for debt repayments........... 307.51
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 469
Amount short for making debt repayments. -161.49
Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 2,000
Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -15,718
Net Assets.............................. -13,718
Created using the SOA calculator at
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using IE browser.[/font]

Anything you could sell to put some funds towards your debts? What were they built up on? was it before you were with husband or after? was the money spent on him as well - or on joint items? If so its very unfair of him to blame you for them.
Does he have any debts himself?

How are you managing the £161 shortfall at the moment? are you slipping further into debt or an overdraft each month? is OH contibuting this so you can balance each month?

MentalMinnie

I was going to make a (joke) comment about getting one from eBay...but i won't.

Thing is, people adapt when they have a child and income drops. Are your payments up to date, or with debt collectors?

If they are already with debt agencies, i believe you can reduce the payments to a token payment whilst on SMP. I could be wrong though?!

RAS

Julie

You appear to be listing one salary but to be listing the whole cost of the household against it? Some of those costs are very high if they only cover one half of theb household expenditure.

What does you partner earn, what does he pay for and what does he owe?

raven83

hi if this is you SOA for if you had given up work and was on one wage when you have baby you would be intitled to working tax and child tax credit not to mention child benefit plus you man also be intitiled to some HB. put your details into here it will give you a rough indication if you was to have a child as to what you could get http://www.turn2us.org.uk/

amorge

Hi, I know it's hard coping when a child comes along but you honestly just adapt your lifestyle as someone else has pointed out. You'll also be entitled to child benefit, maternity pay and possibly working tax credit

It's a cliche but it's never financially a good time to have a child

Good luck
x

[Deleted User]

Go for it and adapt, we did and it was okay, it can be difficult when things change and you never know when that can happen.

MentalMinnie

amorge wrote: »

It's a cliche but it's never financially a good time to have a child

Good luck
x

Exactly right! x

BlueCow1975

I quite agree, there is NEVER a good time to have a baby as there is always something. Not to be rude, but I suppose you do need to take age into account. If you are in your 20's then time is more on your side. If you are into your 30's then you may want to consider it sooner rather than later. If you decide not to go for it immediately / in the new future, perhaps you could have a discussion with your partner and get an operation baby plan into action (eg. specify when, put a plan in place to get as much off your debts as possible before hand) and it may be that you need to agree to meet in the middle somewhere and find some common ground. Obviously, you both need to be on the same page when planning such a huge (and wonderful!) life change.

When I had my first son I did not get a salary from work for 12 months - just the basic statutory maternity pay and then no pay at all. It was a shock, but we basically made a lot of changes and got through it fine. I started to Ebay my old clothes, shoes, bags etc and was so suprised how much things sold for I started a little Ebay business which I could do around the baby, buying the odd item to sell on. That contributed 200.00 or so a month into the pot.

Not sure if you could consider mystery shopping as another option to make a little on the side as the baby grows. We also did a few car boot sales and made 50.00 here and there. Are there any options of an additional job when your baby is a little older (Saturday work?) as again even 1 day a week will add another 100.00 a month into your pot. Joining survey sites may help. Its certainly not going to pay out lots, but it is amazing how the 10.00 voucher here and there add's up over the year and can help with gift buying / Christmas.

dark^knight

If you really want a baby, then go for it. As people have said, you learn to manage.