Christmas planning

Newly_retired

Apologies for this topic as I am sure it is one we may try to avoid.

How do we all manage to fit all the branches of the family in over Christmas when we live at a distance from everyone?
DH will be working non-stop from Dec 18th to noon on 25th Dec , then will just be ready to collapse in a heap and sleep.
We have 2 x 2 grandchildren ( mine) and their parents of course, other grown up children(his), and one very elderly MIL we want to see, and that'sbefore we consider the wider family.

Nobody wants to come to us, for very practical reasons.
So I am not planning on buying in any extra food or drink - very MSE!

(But I am struggling already with the isolation and missing them all!)

sparrer

It's fairly straightforward here, my DB and SiL and I take turns in having our 90 y/o DM who is our only commitment - this year she'll come to me, we may or may not (depending how DM is) have dinner with my DD and her family 10 miles away, DS who is up North will either come here or go to other family/friends. I don't understand all this rushing around to 'fit people in', if they want to see me/I want to see them we can do so 365 days a year, not just at Christmas. Also several of us live a distance away and find it easier to travel on an ordinary weekend than BH's.

margaretclare

sparrer wrote: »

It's fairly straightforward here, my DB and SiL and I take turns in having our 90 y/o DM who is our only commitment - this year she'll come to me, we may or may not (depending how DM is) have dinner with my DD and her family 10 miles away, DS who is up North will either come here or go to other family/friends. I don't understand all this rushing around to 'fit people in', if they want to see me/I want to see them we can do so 365 days a year, not just at Christmas. Also several of us live a distance away and find it easier to travel on an ordinary weekend than BH's.

I completely agree with this. I don't understand it either!

savingssaver

I am going to struggle this christmas, only 1 payday, and i have so much to pay for, its my auntys wedding and were buying our own bridesmaid dresses, and got to pay deposit for the hen do too, and christmas presents, i dont no how im going to mannage.

Grandmama

Do what we do. Fed up with all this who goes to who and all the arguments over Xmas, we now go away on our own over the Festive Period, usually abroad. We meet up on the holiday with all the other dissallusioned grandparents and have a really nice time enjoying other countries festive events. We are going this year to Belguim for Xmas with a well known Coach Company. 6 days , all travel, hotel, half board and extra trips included, nearly door to door pick up, all for just over £400 each. We reckon it's cheaper than a UK hotel break and cheaper than travelling to or hosting family and much easier on our nerves. Family will get usual Xmas cards and pressies sent. Bliss.

Kazzabell80

I am very lucky this year as my parents and sister are actually coming to me. MIL stays with us every Christmas for a few days (that way she gets to see DS and DD open pressies....and help with the washing up!).

My family all live abroad (Malta and the Falklands Islands.....we are in Wales) so we rarely get to spend the festive season together (7 years ago with my parents and 5 years ago with my older brother), but we usually get around this by spending some time with Skype on during the day. That way, my parents, sister and brothers get to see the kids open pressies and the trial and tribulations of turkey cooking!!! It also allows us to toast the season as if we were all actually together.

It works for us.

Savvy_Sue

In my youff, I offered to help out at a Christmas Day meal for those who would be alone at Christmas. I was a bit unsure how my parents would respond to me being out all day, but within a few years Mum was running the kitchen, I was helping her in there, my older siblings were driving minibuses to collect people, and my younger siblings were being charming and entertaining to the guests.

Dad was at home cooking the roast potatoes in the morning and enjoying the peace and quiet in the afternoon!

As we were too tired by the end of the day to open presents, and too old to get up at 5 am to do so, we had presents on Christmas Eve, and this became our 'norm'.

So, OP, if your DH is too tired to enjoy Christmas, postpone it!

We fell into the habit of a quiet day at home with the children (once they were teenagers it was quiet, anyway!) and then up to the grandparents for a few days AFTER Christmas. Presents were kept for exchange then. I would go demented in the kitchen doing the full Turkey number.

Last year I only had the use of one arm, so we went out for lunch on Christmas Day instead, to one of the 'all you can eat' pan Asian places near us. They charged a little more than usual, but it was superb VFM, and we may well do the same again this year!

[Deleted User]

we are FREE this year and I am so looking forward to it. The first time in 41 years of mostly ME making christmas happen and I am the one feeling jaded afterwards, closely followed by dh who helps non-stop. No extra catering and shopping . A combination of events means DDs and DS plus grandchildren, will all be seeing their in laws

No food shopping except for a small waitrose home delivery for the two of us, feet up, a cycle ride we can do what we want. The children always conspire to make sure that some of them are here over christmas and they are mortified that they got things `wrong` so I am slowly educating them, one at a time and very gently. They want to keep us included but secretly I wanted to do away with all the fuss, expense and sheer exhaustion

while I am on here: DH wants to know what to get me, doh why can`t men listen out like we do and pick up ideas through the months, I got his ages ago. Thing is I don`t know off the top of my head what I want. Anyone got any ideas for a 60+ year old who isn`t into jewellery or slippers

tanith

Kittie my DH has bought me a new wireless printer for xmas.. very welcome indeed..

margaretclare

We've gone away for a few Christmases recently, although we don't much like the idea of a coach trip - we prefer to travel independently. However, this year we're not going anywhere or doing very much. Reason: our 10th wedding anniversary is coming up soon afterwards, on 14th January in fact, and we want to go away somewhere special for that particular weekend. We can't do that and Christmas as well.

Newly_retired

Well your replies do show a more positive side to my question, thank you.
The thing is, we do miss our families. Everyone is so busy especially in term time and the week before Christmas, but everyone is "free" after that and it becomes a jigsaw puzzle. If we don't see them in school holidays it will be February half term next.
DH is particular is worried silly about not being with his mother who is house bound and on her, though her carers will come in as usual.
I am longing to see my grandchildren who are still small and still believe in Father Christmas, but we always miss out.
We usually go our separate ways on Boxing Day and each visit our "own" side of the family.