Pet cremation - what do you do?

Pechow

I think there's no right or wrong way of dealing with loss. The memories are what's most important.

My Border Collie went downhill and died within a day while I was out of the country, and my parents decided to let her be cremated with others and scattered. I feel a bit like with the ashes I could have had some kind of closure, as I felt guilty (and probably always will) for not being there for her in her last moments-especially since I was supposed to be home at that point, extended my return flight for something. Also didn't like the idea of her being mixed with others, but that's what my Dad (who loved her as much as I did-so much so he even cried in front of my mum over her, this is the same man who couldn't bring himself to be seen upset when his Mum died) decided. So for me personally, I would have liked to have had the ashes, to scatter them in her favourite walking places, as it would have given me a sense of finality.

That got a bit long, never spoken about it before. But whatever works for you, is fine, and if you don't want the ashes back that's fine too. Afterall, they're just ashes in the end, the important parts are already left behind, inside you.

candygirl

geri1965 wrote: »

I didn't bother to get mine - once they are gone, they are gone in my opinion. The ashes would mean nothing to me.

Me too hun.I spoil them to death all their lives, when they go over to rainbow bridge I just let the vet take care of their remains, gutting though it is:(:(:(

vicx

My first Yorkie passed away at home 4 year ago, we buried him in our garden. We then lost our second Yorkie 6 months ago, he had to be put to sleep. I was hysterical, stayed with him until his last breath and even carried his body back to the car as there was no way I was leaving him at the vet - my dad buried him in my garden with my other Yorkie.

My King Charles passed away at home 2 months ago. I would have liked her to be buried in the garden along with my other two but she was a big dog due to her problems so we had to have her cremated. I got her ashes returned in a casket. The plan was to bury her ashes in the grave with my two yorkies but when the time came to collect them, I could not part with them so they are in my bedroom where she slept.

You may change your mind when the time comes but as others have said there is no right or wrong way, its personal preference, everyone is different. Since I could not bury my dog with my other two I wanted her back home and close to me and I have no plans to ever scatter or bury her ashes, I don't think I could ever part with them.

rising_from_the_ashes

elsien wrote: »

Ok. I've just googled. This is for people as well as pets. You can make them into paperweights, rings, earrings and cufflinks. Is it just me or is this a really bizarre idea, having a loved one dangling from your earlobes -it all just seems a bit creepy.

Yup that sounds very creepy to me too!

I have a similar dilemma - pooch is now ancient and I know that time is limited (can't even bear thinking about it ...) and I know I need to make the decision of what to do before it happens as I'll be in no fit state when it does.

All the other pets are in DM & DFs garden .... on the one hand I'd like him to be there so he has company but on the other I can't bear the thought of him not being with me (and know that they will move at some point so they'll be left behind) - he's my "one" IYKWIM.

I know it's not the same as him being here but I think having his ashes may make it feel like he's still with me - although the memories of him will be with me anyway ...... I just don't know what to do:(

GH

elsien wrote: »

Just canvassing some opinions really.
Mutt is getting on a bit, and although hopefully with me for a while yet I've seen how quickly things can happen so although it's a bit morbid I'm starting to think ahead.
Previous mutt was PTS while I was on holiday and was buried (with my permission) in the kennel owners front garden - they thought a lot of her, I was in shock as she wasn't ill went I went away, and I was happier for them to deal with her than start sorting out arrangements myself when she was already gone. And I've never regretted the decision.
I don't fancy the idea of mutt going off with with all the others for a mass cremation and am happy to pay for individual cremation. But I don't think I'm that fussed about getting her ashes back - I can't see them sitting on my mantelpiece, she doesn't go in my garden so I wouldn't scatter her there and I have no idea what else I would do with her.
I know it's an individual thing, but am I weird for not wanting her back? What do/have you other folks done in a similar situation?

I see you have a Bull Terrier. Our Bully died last week and we got the ashes back 3 days ago in a lovely wooden casket. My opinion about what to do changed 180 degrees in a very short space of time. Before she died I felt that getting the ashes back would be a waste of time and was annoyed when my wife told the vet she wanted them back before Daisy was pts. She had an individual cremation. Collecting the ashes from the vets was very tough and we were both in bits when we got home. We discussed burying them in the garden but as we won't be in this house forever we didn't want to do that and my wife didn't want them sitting in the back of a cupboard. Neither did we want to scatter them in the garden as we felt it was too final. So what we've done is put them in a lovely box along with momentos from Daisy's life and the box will have a special place in our study.

As others have said it's a very personal thing but now I'm very glad that my wife decided to get the ashes back.

Best of luck.

Kinski

I've got both my girls ashes sitting on top of the computer cupboard, my family have been told that when I snuff it the girls are to be put in beside me and also any other pet I might loose before I go, just hope it's not going to be to crowded in there.

penguin83

When I had to have my horse PTS, they came and collected her and I had the option of cremating her on her own or with others and I could either go and pick up the ashes or they would scatter her in their garden of rememberance. I wanted her home with me - I hadn't made any prior decisions and that is what felt right at the time. She is now in my living room and as you can imagine it is a pretty large box! I have often thought about scattering her ashes but as of yet it hasn't felt right (she died 2 years ago).

When the time comes you will know what is right for you xx

tanith

I sadly had my 21yr old cat PTS this morning , I just knew this morning that this was the day . It was very peaceful and I brought her home and we'll bury her at the bottom of the garden tomorrow, she'll join our other old lady who we buried 2 xmas's ago.. I'll miss her so much.

SnowyOwl_2

tanith wrote: »

I sadly had my 21yr old cat PTS this morning , I just knew this morning that this was the day . It was very peaceful and I brought her home and we'll bury her at the bottom of the garden tomorrow, she'll join our other old lady who we buried 2 xmas's ago.. I'll miss her so much.

I'm sorry to hear that Tanith. Saying goodbye to such a long term friend is very very hard.