Getting a present not on gift list..?

littlesnuggy

My OH's sister is getting married next weekend and [STRIKE]we[/STRIKE] I still haven't sorted their wedding present (her birthday is the same day so I'm working on that present first!)

They have a gift list with John Lewis but all the items left on it are really boring (cutlery, towels and sheets) and parts of sets that we wouldn't be buying all of.

I'm therefore thinking of getting something different, not from the list. But would you secretly be a bit annoyed if someone got you something you didn't necessarily want when there is a list of things that you have said you would like and directed them to? I know nobody should or would be annoyed at receiving any present from a loved one, but would you think it was strange/silly of them not to just get from the list?

And does anyone have any good ideas for a different gift that they have received, would like to receive or have given and has been well received?!

Thanks!

Tiara_2

While the items may be boring on the gift list, perhaps they are things they genuinely need or really want? For example, good quality soft towels and bed sheets would be a real treat for me, and they could be looking to replace old worn out ones. Sorry but I would be inclined to just stick to the list.

While I can see your logic in not getting part of a set, as you can't guarantee that anyone else will purchase the matching bits, I would go for the "boring" option of towels or bed linen. It's also a safe bet as you know they will be well received, and you know for sure they are items that they have chosen, like, and will enjoy using.

Debbiecatal

We had a list when we got married 32 years ago as we were setting up home together and needed lots of boring things. Most people bought off the list and we were really grateful for the presents however boring as we really needed them!

I do remember my mother's rather grand friend complaining that there was nothing 'really quite good enough' on the list and she chose to buy us a pearl handled silver cake slice in a presentation box! It was a real source of amusement at the time, but I have to say I still regularly use it and always think of Ethel fondly when I do!

littlesnuggy

Thanks for the replies. They've lived together already for 4 years so already have a lot of the necessities. Maybe I'm just being reluctant to buy gift list stuff as I think it's so expensive for what it is (£7 for a single fork, £90 for a duvet cover!) I know they're probably luxuries they wouldn't buy themselves though, so will probably just get something from the list.

minerva_windsong

I bought my sister a teapot when she got married - I went to one of those paint your own pottery places and decorated the teapot with weddingy images. They absolutely loved it. I think that if you're close to the person getting married then something like that can be a good idea (I picked the teapot because my sister loves tea), but if it's someone you don't know that well then I'd stick to the list.

mrshappy

Does the list have the option of adding to a gift card? Our list was with Debenhams and guests could add to a gift card which was then sent to us and we used it to finish off bits on the list. We had also lived together before getting married and had nice towels etc on the list-things that were luxuries. I know it's nice to get a couple something a bit more personal and special for a wedding gift, I tend to put something on the gift card if I can and get a small personal gift as well.
I wasn't annoyed if anyone didn't buy off the list, I appreciated the thought as we weren't expecting gifts at all as we got married abroad, are a bit older, had lived together and it was my 2nd time around.

mummyroysof3

could you not just speak to them about it?

Kaye1

For immediate family, I never stick to the wedding list- I always get them something personal. For our best friend we had a sign made up with his family name and they were delighted.

However, if I am not particularly close to them, I stick to the list.

Murtle

Can you do a bit of a tidy up on her gift list and buy her the missing parts of uncompleted sets?

Depending how much you want to spend you could also buy them something a little different not from the list.

RainbowDrops

We took a lot of time pick things for our list and loved each item.

We had a few "off list" gifts that were nice too - beautiful silver salad servers, stonewear, and towels. All lovely, although not matching with the rest of our stuff. But lovely nonetheless.

Anyway, what I'm saying is, if your sis is like me, she'll be delighted to get the extra bits to complete sets.
However, you know your sis, and if you've kept an eye on the list, you might notice something that wasn't added, or know stuff that she likes that wasn't on list.

Torry_Quine

I must admit that I tend to buy off list as there is rarely anything for a reasonable price, plus I think that it's nice to put something of myself into it.

They should be happy to receive anything.