Why buy or rent if you parents can support you?

lottee

Apart from privacy & independance, which to me are quite important, yeh I can see what you're getting at. But IMO, I can't understand people that want to stay at home into their late 20's / 30's, not only the kids, but the parents - I meant cut the apron strings !!!!!!! I know some are at uni etc, which is different, but if you are out working full time, get out & stand on your own 2 feet!

GingerSte

I recently moved back in with my parents at 26, in order to do a 3-month course, and after about three weeks I was screaming to get out! Personally I prefer my own space and indpendance, but I've always been like that. My sister hasn't left home and it doesn't look like she ever will (she know's what side her bread's buttered on).

Also, another reason for not living at home: work is 130 miles away from my parents' house. The commute would be a nightmare!

kiwigirl

Hi all,

I'm 29 and still living at home but due to certain circumstances, not from want!

Some of the reasons are that my mum had very bad cancer for the last two years and is now recovered enough to be able to do things around the house.

I lost my job due to a bullying boss so I lost £10k per annum last year and now in a short term fixed contract where I wouldn't get a mortgage and couldn't afford rent on my own. I am trying for permanent jobs with a similar wage that I did have in previous job, but so far no luck.

I do have my own independance at home, so it's not too bad but I'm quite close to my parents anyway. I am looking for work outside the area and I'd definately not be able to commute as they're hours / miles away.

I am thinking if I don't get a good permanent post before I'm 30 I might emigrate, so that's another reason why to stay at home, build a good deposit on a house wherever I land up too.

A colleague of mine is older than myself and still living at home with virtually no savings so I don't see her moving out soon. I'm more inclined to make the break than her and she's on more wages and got a permanent post.

KG

Tustastic

I shipped out finally when I was 20, only moving back once for a couple of months between selling one property and moving into the next. I paid my way during that time.
Surely the key to multi-generation living is respect and agreed ground rules on all sides? Stuff like paying your way, not offending other peoples ethics/morals, not opening other people's post even if you gave birth to them, etc etc. NB the ground rules have to be agreed by all, not just set down by the dominant party.

roswell

I think its all a culteral thing, if you look at africa / asia you will find that it is a way of support for the whole family, the grand parents look after the young, the teenagers / Male adults go out to work / farm the land, the females do house hold and cooking work and possibly some assitance in the fields.

This ensures everyone has a dry place to put there head at night a full belly and care for all. The young babies are caredfor and in excahnge the adults will care for the grand parents when they get to ill to look after the babies.

its not a bad system if you think about it outside of " the uk norm"

Tustastic

roswell wrote:

I think its all a culteral thing, if you look at africa / asia you will find that it is a way of support for the whole family, the grand parents look after the young, the teenagers / Male adults go out to work / farm the land, the females do house hold and cooking work and possibly some assitance in the fields.

This ensures everyone has a dry place to put there head at night a full belly and care for all. The young babies are caredfor and in excahnge the adults will care for the grand parents when they get to ill to look after the babies.

its not a bad system if you think about it outside of " the uk norm"

Good point, though I think you will find that the females do the childcare, cooking AND work in the fields AND run small businesses.:)
Multigenerational living was the norm in my (UK) family up to two generations ago e.g. the 1960s. Swept away through prosperity and individualism. I'm sure it would come back if we perceived the advantages to outweigh the disadvantages.

painted_lady

Hhhm, I left home 3 weeks after my 18th birthday, rented places for 5 years (including while at uni and a stint working in the USA), then bought my house when I was 22. I have lived here 7 years now. I am proud that I have been so independent, paid every penny of this house ourselves (bought with BF), we worked hard, played hard and saved hard and didnt have to ask our parents for a thing. I since bought 2-3 investment houses and made a lot of money, I didnt ask parents, I did this by borrowing £10,000 from the bank. I am fiercly independent and my parents are proud of this.
I get on with my parents very well, go on holidays with them, etc, but would never ask them for money. They have a big house and have almost paid their mortgage off, it would have been cheaper and easier to live at home, but not nearly as satisfying, I value my independence, freedom and sanity! I had to move back for 3 weeks when I was 21 and although my parents had me there rent free and are pretty laid back, I couldnt cope with not having my own space.
Maybe it is a cultural thing, but I wouldnt swap my position for anything.

nearlyrich

As a parent of almost independant young adults I love them to bits and they can stay as long as they need to but they will be paying reasonable board and lodgings for their keep. I encourage them to be independant and it's nice to have the house to ourselves.

Alan_M_2

I left home at 18 (now 37), three years ago my folks were moving house and had a 4 month gap between leaving the old and getting in the new, so I invited them to stay with me. I was dreading it at the time, but as I've always worked long hours I'm not there a whole lot anyway.

I shouldn't have worried, my home had never been so clean, all my laundry was done, I had a nice meal cooked every day when I got home...it was quite pleasant. I wouldn't take any money from them so they insisted on doing that and buying food.

I have to say I missed them quite a bit when they went!

Do it full time? probably not, but living in self contained buildings on one plot, i.e a large house split into annexes is viable.

I'd have to leave Surrey and move up to Norfolk to afford to do that though.

Daisies

Anyone see "Lilies" on BBC1 on Friday night? The sister who got married went to live with her future husband's family - it only appeared to be his mother. That was the norm for this country for the first part of the last century anyway.

Now, I can see advantages and disadvantages. The whole, multi-generational family living together would be good for childcare (and for caring for the elderly and/or ill) you'd assume, but that really depends on the eldest generation being prepared to babysit, and the younger generation being prepared to care for the elderly - these days I can imagine a lot of the people who would have done that now being out at work!

It would be good from an environmental point of view too - more economical for electricity/gas, more bulk purchases from the supermarket etc.

When I was growing up my parents built a granny flat on the side of the house and my gran lived there until I was 17 (when she died). She had Sunday lunch with us, and Mum used to do her shopping, and we'd pop round a lot to see her and she'd come round to do our washing up (!) - kind of communal living but with your own space too. It worked really well. I lived there for a year last year and it also worked well for me. I didn't fork out for a TV licence, just used to go next door and watch TV! We had some meals together, some separately and everyone had their own space too. But, of course, it was a separate address so not that much saved - still had to pay council tax and utility bills!