What do "swabs" test for? - Possibly TMI - Maybe just one for the ladies

Dizzy_Ditzy

i had very similar symptoms to you, and was diagnosed with endometriosis. Might be worth checking it out?

The pelvic scan sounds scarier than it actually is- you could always ask them for a pillow/cushion to put underneath you to make it a little bit more comfortable

peachyprice

LadyMorticia wrote: »

I do think that I tense up alot. I find it extremely hard to relax. I have an anxiety disorder and had a difficult childhood so maybe associate sex with being hurt?

It's a possibility that it's connected to your childhood, perhaps trying for a baby has disturbed some deep rooted sub-concious memories.

Have you tried going back to basics with sex, just kissing, cuddling, touching etc with no penetration until you feel more comfortable?

LadyMorticia

queen_of_cheap wrote: »

i had very similar symptoms to you, and was diagnosed with endometriosis. Might be worth checking it out?

The pelvic scan sounds scarier than it actually is- you could always ask them for a pillow/cushion to put underneath you to make it a little bit more comfortable

I'm not really sure how I'd broach the endometriosis thing with my doctor (or even how it's diagnosed). I did read about it, but I always find that doctors don't like it when you go in mentioning diseases as they think you're trying to do their job.:o

peachyprice wrote: »

It's a possibility that it's connected to your childhood, perhaps trying for a baby has disturbed some deep rooted sub-concious memories.

Have you tried going back to basics with sex, just kissing, cuddling, touching etc with no penetration until you feel more comfortable?

We have tried but I find that I get really upset and impatient, I guess, because I just want to be "normal".:o

bedpotato_2

If it feels like he is bumping into something it could be your cervix (maybe you have a short vagina or maybe he is not arousing you enough beforehand - apparently during arousal the vagina expands not only sideways but also lengthways) or it could also be that you are constipated and the thing he is bumping against is poo. (Don't laugh - I am not making this up - I have IBS and for years had chronic constipation and it ruined my sex life).

Is there a chance you could be suffering from frequent constipation? If so you need to find out what's causing it and clear it up. The vaginal passage and the anal passage are so close together that if you are constipated the lumps of poo will be protruding through the sides of the vagina and if you insert your fingers you will be able to feel them. A penis banging against said lumps of poo is EXTREMELY painful and will make you scream out. A non-constipated woman should not be able to feel any lumps of poo through the vaginal wall because after having a normal bowl movement the bottom part of the anal passage should be cleared out.

Of course, only a doctor can confirm what your problem is, but if it does turn out to be constipation that's causing it, you could resort to using enemas before having sex to clear things out and ensure things will be pain-free until you find out the root cause and sort out a proper solution.

LadyMorticia

bedpotato wrote: »

If it feels like he is bumping into something it could be your cervix (maybe you have a short vagina or maybe he is not arousing you enough beforehand - apparently during arousal the vagina expands not only sideways but also lengthways) or it could also be that you are constipated and the thing he is bumping against is poo. (Don't laugh - I am not making this up - I have IBS and for years had chronic constipation and it ruined my sex life).

Is there a chance you could be suffering from frequent constipation? If so you need to find out what's causing it and clear it up. The vaginal passage and the anal passage are so close together that if you are constipated the lumps of poo will be protruding through the sides of the vagina and if you insert your fingers you will be able to feel them. A penis banging against said lumps of poo is EXTREMELY painful and will make you scream out. A non-constipated woman should not be able to feel any lumps of poo through the vaginal wall because after having a normal bowl movement the bottom part of the anal passage should be cleared out.

Of course, only a doctor can confirm what your problem is, but if it does turn out to be constipation that's causing it, you could resort to using enemas before having sex to clear things out and ensure things will be pain-free until you find out the root cause and sort out a proper solution.

Well...that's not something I'd thought of...lol.

I'm having tests for Coeliacs at the moment. The doctor said if that comes back negative then it's probably IBS with gluten as a trigger.

I only suffer from stomach/bowel problems when I've ingested gluten and going gluten-free makes all those problems go away, including the constipation/diarrhea (it changes).

It's not something I'd thought of though so thank you for mentioning. Because they're so close together, could that also be the reason why when I'm constipated, I find it hard to actually wee?

bedpotato_2

LadyMorticia wrote: »

Well...that's not something I'd thought of...lol.

I'm having tests for Coeliacs at the moment. The doctor said if that comes back negative then it's probably IBS with gluten as a trigger.

I only suffer from stomach/bowel problems when I've ingested gluten and going gluten-free makes all those problems go away, including the constipation/diarrhea (it changes).

It's not something I'd thought of though so thank you for mentioning. Because they're so close together, could that also be the reason why when I'm constipated, I find it hard to actually wee?

I know - it's weird, isn't it? It was all new to me when the doctor explained it to me, but now I'm pretty used to it.

It's worth checking if that could be your problem, if only to eliminate a possible cause. If you are a person who is not squeamish about touching your own body you can easily check to see if you're constipated by poking your fingers up your vagina and having a feel for any lumps of poo. The lumps will be on the side of the vaginal wall that is closest to your back. It helps if you "bear down" when doing this. If you do notice anything then suggest to your hubby that it is NOT a good time for sex because having sex under such conditions can cause recurring urine infections as well as agonising pain. In fact that was the reason I went to the GP - I kept getting urine infections that got worse and turned into kidney infections and they had to find out the cause. The doctor said that because the wall of tissue between the anus and vagina is so thin, the penis banging against the poo (that shouldn't be there) will not only cause extreme pain but may also cause germs to soak through. Needless to say, you do NOT want poo germs ending up in your vagina or urinary tract. Once I started using enemas to clear out the poo before sex, the urine infections stopped and have never come back. But enemas are NOT a long-term solution.

With regards to the weeing. I have never heard of constipation affecting urinating. The urinary tract is located somewhere entirely different so it shouldn't be blocked just because the anal passage is. I'm not big on biology but so far as I know there is no reason why being constipated should affect the flow of urine being able to come out freely. That sounds rather alarming so maybe you should mention it to the doctor. Urine infections normally go the other way: rather than NOT being able to wee, one has to wee far more frequently than usual.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

PM on its way, LM.

LadyMorticia

bedpotato wrote: »

I know - it's weird, isn't it? It was all new to me when the doctor explained it to me, but now I'm pretty used to it.

It's worth checking if that could be your problem, if only to eliminate a possible cause. If you are a person who is not squeamish about touching your own body you can easily check to see if you're constipated by poking your fingers up your vagina and having a feel for any lumps of poo. The lumps will be on the side of the vaginal wall that is closest to your back. It helps if you "bear down" when doing this. If you do notice anything then suggest to your hubby that it is NOT a good time for sex because having sex under such conditions can cause recurring urine infections as well as agonising pain. In fact that was the reason I went to the GP - I kept getting urine infections that got worse and turned into kidney infections and they had to find out the cause. The doctor said that because the wall of tissue between the anus and vagina is so thin, the penis banging against the poo (that shouldn't be there) will not only cause extreme pain but may also cause germs to soak through. Needless to say, you do NOT want poo germs ending up in your vagina or urinary tract. Once I started using enemas to clear out the poo before sex, the urine infections stopped and have never come back. But enemas are NOT a long-term solution.

With regards to the weeing. I have never heard of constipation affecting urinating. The urinary tract is located somewhere entirely different so it shouldn't be blocked just because the anal passage is. I'm not big on biology but so far as I know there is no reason why being constipated should affect the flow of urine being able to come out freely. That sounds rather alarming so maybe you should mention it to the doctor. Urine infections normally go the other way: rather than NOT being able to wee, one has to wee far more frequently than usual.

Thank you for the info. It's very useful and I really appreciate the time you've taken to reply to me.

I never realised that it could be such a problem, but now what you've mentioned it, it is a feesable one as they are both so close together.

:grouphug:

With the weeing thing, I've had this problem for as long as I can remember. When I'm constipated, I find it harder to wee (which is really uncomfortable when I'm desperate and can't go).

I thought it was normal.:o Maybe it isn't.:think:

I apologise for not writing a longer reply. The M.E brain fog is setting in but I'll hopefully try to write a longer one tomorrow.:)

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

PM on its way, LM.

Thank you.

Dizzy_Ditzy

what drinks do you take in during the day?

LadyMorticia

queen_of_cheap wrote: »

what drinks do you take in during the day?

Water and tea.

I'm not a fan of fizzy or fruity drinks and detest coffee.:o