£50 a week too much pocket money?

Sugarhunny1

Hi folks,

Me and my partner have been going through a debt busting few months and have approx £8000 left to pay off, all on 0%.

My other half has two jobs and works a total of 48 hours a week. I have 3 jobs which total approx 20 hours a week and look after the 3 kids most of the time.

My question is this...... My other half and me decided a wee while ago that he would have his 'own' money as i deal with all other aspects of the money, bills etc. Should i 'suggest' he has less till we get debt free? Is this mean of me?

I dont have any such money that i call my 'own' but do have access to money through the week but i reckon i dont spend more then £25 a week on things for ME.

Thanks very much for reading and any advice given!

Sugar xxx

mh1923

You should both have the same amount of pocket money, which you don't have to account for to the other. Whether £50 a week is too much depends on your budget, but if he has £50, you should have £50 too!

whatatwit

What does he spend it on?

Have you kept a spending diary, as quite often when you are doing the shopping any ME things tend to get thrown in with that as well.

You could maybe suggest a token reduction, OR, allocate yourself the same amount and then if you have money left, you could casually mention it as you put it into a savings jar.

Sugarhunny1

Thanks for the quick replies.

I dont know what he spends it on, mainly lunches at work i think. I'll start a spending diary tomorrow and count EVERYTHING thats for ME and then maybe broach the subject after a week.

He's very guarded of his pocket money and insists i repay shopping if he spends his money, which i suppose is correct but sometimesbuys stuff that we dont need and from TESCO ( i work in Asda and get discount!)

Moan moan moan, i sound like a typical woman!

Sugarhunny1

I dont think we could both afford to have £50. our estimated earnings between us is approx £20,000 a year after tax.

mh1923

I think it's very important that partners have at least a little bit of money that they don't have to account for to the other, so if it were me, I would not ask him for an accounting of his spending money.

But yes, you should track your personal spending for a week, so that when he says 'But you have all the money! I just have £50!' you can show him the figures.

Does he smoke? That will eat up a lot of pocket money right there.

Sugarhunny1

No he doesnt smoke, recently started to eat alot of veg & fruit though as he is trying to lose weight which i support. He walks the 2 miles to work so i have the car etc etc and is generally a kind man. Dont know if im just being mean!

LookingAhead

Hi sugar.

Well, get started on your own spending diary and let him see that without forcing it down his throat and perhaps it will encourage him to think about what he spends on.

Has he suggested the £50 or is it just a figure in your head at the moment? Really I think if it were me, I would try to get an idea of what he *needs* per week before offering what might be, too much. Whilst you are still in debt anyway.

Good luck with clearing your £8k!

whatatwit

Could you do him a packed lunch?

At the moment though, you estimate to spend about £20, if you were to 'give' yourself £50 and then you can a big show of putting the balance in a debt jar.

All you would be doing is moving round the money that you already have, the idea is not for you to keep the £50 just be a bit tricksy.

Sugarhunny1

There is stuff in the house that he could easily make up his own packed lunch up as i give the kids a packed lunch for school. he has had this amount for months now but i would like to see that little bit extra going towards the debt. I just dont know if im being overly mean!

I'll do a spending diary and report back exactly what im spending on me. be quite interesting to find out what i do spend on me!

LookingAhead

It would be quite difficult now I think to cut it back if he's had that for months. With him working three jobs, no doubt he wants to see some of this money or he'll be thinking "What am I doing all this for...?"

Unless he is willing to see every penny go towards the debts, calling it back in now *might* cause arguments/rifts?

I would do the diary and leave it hanging about....he might well take your lead without you having to say anything.