What's the naughtiest thing you've done at your most skint?

harrybear_1988

Well I started reading this thread at work last night and sat there sniffling and stifling sobs for several hours!

I'm 23 and facing a difficult time in my life emotionally and financially- or so I thought. Having read through this thread, I now see that 1) it could be a lot worse and people in those situations are STILL less miserable than I, and 2) I have lived through far far worse before! My brain seemed to have forgotten the tough times that my family lived through when I was a child.

We were always very poor when I was a child, my dad worked as a herdsman on a farm and myself, 2 siblings and my parents lived in tied accommodation (a house thrown in with the job). The house was horrid - mould covered every wall and the bathroom was freezing. We always had jumblesale clothes, or hand downs from a friend who had a daughter a couple of years older than me. We did get new stuff from time to time, my parents where never mean with any money they did have, and most likely went without themselves.
When our car was stolen, we didn't have one for a very long time. My mum used to cycle a six mile round trip in the sweltering heat or freezing cold to buy some food from the local post office, and in the times when we did have a car, sometimes she had to pay with bags of 2ps we had saved in our penny jar. I remember feeling embarrassed, but even at the age of say 10 or 11, I noticed how the person serving in the shop was always more embarrassed than we were. We regularly loaned our birthday or christmas money to our parents to buy essentials. School shoes were worn until and after the soles had holes in - my parents refused to compromise on foot health so we were very lucky to have one pair of clarkes fitted shoes every year, so they did last quite well. Dinner money for school lunches was always a difficulty as we were not eligible for free school meals (unbelievably!) sometimes it would be 70p or less, which in 2001 wouldn't buy much! At one point there was just no money left, and I took a Pokemon card to school instead, knowing it was a 'rare' one, and got £1.50 for it. I asked mum for dinner money the next day, and she said she didn't have any but could I sell another Pokemon card? I said yes, knowing full well I didn't have any more that were 'rare' and other kids would buy. If I had any dinner money left I would always re-cycle it for dinner money the next day for either myself of my siblings depending on who had less. I also remember my mum's abject horror when I was at Primary school and told a friend's mum that I couldn't come over or go to a netball match because my mum didn't have any petrol for the 3 mile trip. Hospital appointments were always a nightmare because the carparks were so expensive - one day when my mum had quite a serious appointment, someone gave them their pre-paid ticket on the way out and that simple act of kindness literally saved the day.

My money struggles didn't end with childhood. When I had finished my A-levels I got a job to try and save up for university. I had got AAB at A-level and was determined to go, but things like needing a laptop and paying £400 rent in advance were unimaginable for my parents to afford. I was earning £10k a year in my office job, which I topped up by £500 by cleaning the office and bathrooms each day. I tried to split the meagre amount between travel costs, housekeeping money for my mum, and the 'girlfriend tax' incurred by dating a girl who had a plush job in London. I was also trying to get my driving license before uni, so lessons where bleeding me dry. At this time my dad was off work with clinical depression and money was uncertain. I remember the 3 weeks before my first payday were the longest of my life - I had just enough cash saved up for the £2 a day bus fair, but that was it. My family were struggling to make ends meet and it was awful, with everyone waiting for my first payday. I couldn't afford to buy the sandwiches that everyone else ordered at work so I took my own lunch. I made a bag of rice, 5 slices of ham and a handfull of frozen peas last 2 weeks before the hallowed first payday. It felt embarrassing as we had to eat at our desks and it was clear for all to see how poor we were. When I finally got paid, I went to sainsburys after work, lugged as much shopping back as I could and gave it to my mum.

When I went to univeristy in 2007, needless to say I struggled without parental contribution. I worked a lot of hours to cover my expenses, and not in the usual bar job that most students do. I had a serious and stressful job (the one that I do full time now actually) and worked antisocial hours. I was warned by university staff several times not to do so many hours as it was against the rules - they just looked embarrassed when I told them it was a choice between working and finishing uni, or working less, being evicted and not finishing. My parents were the gaurentors for my student house and there was no way I could let that bounce onto them. I now wave my First Class Honours degree certificate proudly, knowing I earned it more than just academically. I now cannot eat asda 9p noodles though!
I have to add that I too nicked the industrial sized loo rolls from university... I used a hair pin to jiggle the catch on the lock on top of the dispenser, then removed my years supply of loo roll

As I mentioned at the top of this post (sorry, it seems enormous!) I have been struggling emotionally lately. The reason for this is because I have the necessary entry requirements, (hopefully) personality type and aptitude for hard work which is required for me to realise a dream and study medicine to be a doctor - but I can't simply because of money. Competition for places is usually 10 or 20-1 , and I have a very strong chance of getting in. But you need enough money in the bank to support yourself for 4 years without paid employment and also around 6,500 upfront for first years fees, not to mention you then take on a huge student loan for the rest of the fees. Because I have a degree, the rules are different on funding etc - meaning that once again only the rich can be doctors. I am now totally lost and don't know what to do with my life.
But reading through this thread, and dredging up my own humble background has made me realise that I need to just let it go - and I should consider myself lucky that I went to university in the first place and be proud that I have successfully navigated the financial maze of life so far.I hope that I can continue working my way through life and end up able to support my parents as soon as possible. I am the sort of person who will always offer to pay if the person in front of me in the queue hasn't got enough money for the items they are trying to buy, pass on parking tickets with time left on them, and leave money on the floor for someone else who needs it more than I do. Doctor or no Doctor - I can still try to be a worthwhile human being. So thank you to everyone who has contributed to this thread, and given me my Eureka moment xxxx

midnight_sky

I used to buy value noodles, instant mash, cheese slices and tomato sauce and that would be my weekly shop. used to put tomato sauce in the mash to make it taste better. I can't even look at instant mash now and seemed to constantly have A cold don't think I was getting the right vitamins tbh.
This was before I had my daughter but I can remember a time when I haven't been able to send her to school because I had nothing to go in her packed lunch and didn't get money till the next day .

poodledoodledoo

When I was 17 I was pregnant and living with a guy who didn't work and spent all of our benefit money on parts for his motorbike. It eventually came to a point that myself and the girl who lived in the bedsit opposite mine (also broke) used to steal chocolate and pasties from the local shop because we literally had no other way of obtaining food. One of us would distract the person on the till while the other would stuff food down their clothing. I still feel bad about it now

Nitha

Used a credit card. Dumbest thing I ever did.

geoffky

Another thing i have done when i was skint was when dole day came me and my best friend who lived in the same flats as me went out for our food shopping..
What we did was make a list between us and agree to it.He would go in with the list and get everything on the list and pay out of the £20 note he had..when he came out he would give me the same list ,the receipt and the exact change and off i would go and get the same..if i was ever pulled i would show the receipt and the exact change.
We never got pulled but looking back the early 80s living on the dole was the most depressing time of my life..boys from the blackstuff sums the time up very well.....
Does anyone remember the documentary "boys from the tip" about all the grown men having to try and make a living on a rubbish tip in birkenhead...bad times indeed..

Bambywamby

A great thread and a fab read. :T It reminded me of a thread from a couple of years ago that has similar content if anyone is interested.

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/1741781

TwelveStopsThenHome

Once when I was awaiting for some job seekers to go in (I was 21), and I returned back home after seperating from an ex, I managed to get a loaf of bread, and a pizza from the local shop. I said I had no money, but he said to pay him when I was sorted. My Dad covered the cost of this as he knew the man who ran the shop.

When my grandfather was alive, he used to give me tins of spagetti as he was never keen on it, which used to serve as tea until I got paid. At this time, I was in a part-time job earning minimum wage and I always ran out of money a week before I got paid. I used to walk there the three days I worked in the morning by leaving @ 6.45-7 in the morning and would get there for 8.30 as I used to cut through the park and take a few of the side roads. Getting home, I used to ask for the bus fayre home....OK it was only one bus, but I used to a) deliberately leave early to catch this one bus that used to stop over the road from my old house or b) get another bus and then walk about 30 mins to my old house.

My ex who we got back together with and he lived in Coventry with his folks gave me money before I got paid and never asked for it back, although I did pay him when me and my Dad got some inheritance money from my Grandad after he passed. The money he gave always went on electric and food.....never fayres as I found food more important. I would always just by one lot of the same food and make the same each day e.g. mince = spag bol, chilli and mince with mash + things like beans on toast, spagetti on toast, pilchards/sardines on toast.

I am struggling now as I always live off an overdraft in the final four days before payday, but my partner does provide some money so we're never too desperate like before.

TwelveStopsThenHome

Also sometimes with the bus thing, as I was around 22/23 when this would happen I could pass a yonger lad, especially as my workplace shared a premises with a secondary school. I always wore a shirt, blazer and trousers and just did my hair different (this was before I started shaving my hair and growing a beard) like spike it up and paid a child fayre which was about half price and used the 20 or 40p to put towards the leccy This was handy on rainy/cold days.

We had a loose change tub, I used to raid this and pretened it was the bus fayre

bananachip

Things were desperately bad for me growing up. My parents divorced when I was 12 and then my mum sunk into alcoholism. I ended up taking a lot of responsibility for running the household and there was very little money, often no food and the electricity would often go out as there was no money for the meter.

A friend was a milk boy and he told me they used to also deliver bakery goods to certain shops. We used to go up to one post office about a mile away as it did not open until reasonably late and take some bread rolls and sausage rolls/pies. I also used to take milk from the doorsteps and once pulled up some fresh vegetables from someones garden and used to occasionally shoplift. I did feel guilty for those things at the time and still do to some extent. Other things I did were sensible and legal like living on lentil bolognese for weeks on end.

I left home and sorted myself out, got a job and went to college and was exceptionally good at managing my meagre income from my grant and part time job and actually used to do things like buy my mum food when I visited or buy her clothes and shoes for presents. I however became a single parent of a young baby with very little money at one point and I went on a crazy shopping spree taking myself over £1200 overdrawn using my cheque book and guarantee card because I was overdrawn anyway and past the point of caring about consequences and also suffering from post natal depression. I went to Boots and stocked up on loads of nappies and wipes, bought toys, went to the supermarket and bought nice food instead of the basics and bought clothes. The guy from the bank came and took my card away and I lived with the consequences of that spree for many years and only now many years on able to get any credit.

I don't think a lot of people realise how much true poverty grinds you down and that people still do struggle for the everyday basics in this country. It is only in the past 4 years for example that I have lived in a house with double glazing and an efficient heating system which I could afford to use but I managed to take being warm and having hot water for granted very quickly. I get furious with my own child sometimes because of how spoiled she is relative to my upbringing and how she takes things like having good food, clothes etc for granted. We are far from being rich but she has such a casual attitude to money and possessions that it really annoys me. On the other hand I am also very glad she does not have the level of worry and responsibility I had at a young age and had always vowed she would be brought up better than I was.

I also still remember the feeling of being hungry and wondering where the next meal would come from and end up overspending at the supermarket and always have cupboards bulging with food, in fact sorting out my groceries budget is something I need to do now.

FOXGLOVE_2

Birdy12 wrote: »

That reminds me of something my mum said. When she was little she lived with her mother and two sisters. One particular Christmas Day there was nothing to eat in the house except porridge oats. Her elder sister made the first batch in the morning but made it too thick, by the time it got to the evening it was gruel consistency.

Think I mentally blocked out the Christmas in my first flat, no furniture apart from single bed in the living room and a Bachelors pasta n sauce for Christmas dinner.

You're right, it makes you appreciate the small things when you remember at one point you had nothing.