Estate Agents spelling mistakes

Contessa

Some of these made me smile. My two favourites are

"The property has an oil fried central heating system"

and, (IIRC),

"From the back there are views of All Stains Church" ( well, it is in a town with a seagull problem!)

Any others which have amused you?

Contessa

This one is not from an EA, but a local paper,

El Nashar Dental Care Ltd



Do I need to explain it?

crazyguy

Davesnave

Here's a few from my vintage collection:

'Oldbury on Severn itself is a small village of outstanding natural beauty and with a close nit community.' (Sounds well up to scratch.)


'An extremely well presented Victorian farmhouse dating back to 1927.'


'Numerous period features, which include exposed beams, window seats, stone mullions, log burning stove set in stone built fireplace with clone oven.' (Put in one loaf, get two?)


'Pond feature and chicken coup.' (Politically aware bantams?)

Built in 1991, this is a substantial family home with extensive views to the front and rear across open countryside and farmland as well as the River Severn with its famous tidal boar. (Surfin’ pigs, Batman!)

'Former village police station withholding many original features.'

'....extensive rear grounds having patio area, GARDEN TOOL STORE and POTTING SHED, censor lights…' (Do something inappropriate & they switch off?)

'PANTRY3.07m(10'1'') x 2.03m(6'8'')Stale worksurface and tiled floor.'

'Two bedroom bungalow with lots to offer. Including stables, hay barn and approximately 7 acres of land. Do not miss out & view toady! '

:rotfl:

McKneff

I bought some emery boards this morning in a bubble pack,

It said 'a r s e grit' :eek:the emery boards were covering the letters c and o.

helphelphelphelp

I used to work at an estate agents and had loads of calls the day after I sent property details out. Instead of typing 'far reaching views' had put in 'fart reaching views'.

centretap

helphelphelphelp wrote: »

I used to work at an estate agents and had loads of calls the day after I sent property details out. Instead of typing 'far reaching views' had put in 'fart reaching views'.

Shouldn't it have been 'fart retching views'?

chris_m

Davesnave wrote: »

Here's a few from my vintage collection:

Hehe, some crackers there, Dave :T:T:T

Davesnave

chris_m wrote: »

Hehe, some crackers there, Dave :T:T:T

Yes, I trotted most of them out here a year or two ago, but they'll be new to some folks.
I collected them over several years on the property trail.
They're all genuine. Some are so puzzling they probably couldn't be made up by anyone, other than an EA.

For example:

'The grounds of the property are a particular feature, being of a particular size and surrounding the ground itself.'

or

' A magnificent three bedroom detached cottage, located in the heart of Frenchay Village, yet not readily visible by traditional methods.'



Other times, it's just that oh-so-helpful synonym feature in 'Word' which is to blame:


'Situated within this exclusive development of 'New England' style homes in Pentre Nicholas Village, enjoying drastic views of the Carmarthen Bay...'


'The infamous resort and village of Saundersfoot, which offers golden sandy beaches, shops and public houses is located just 2 miles distant….'



Anyway, no matter how dire the situation, you can rely on the friendly local EA to put a positive spin on it. The builder may have gone bankrupt but.....


'There is much scope for completion and improvement, as this property is still under construction.'