Any Advice, temp/job & home cant cope

Spendless

alis74- what did the solicitor say at the free 1/2 hr you had recently about the situation of your former marital home?

Looking at the positives. You have work. Yes it may be temporary, but that could change. My temp job has lasted over 14 months, and is on the brinx of being short term permanent. You have your DD who is of an age where she should be becoming more independant, and you shouldn;t be juggling with much if any childcare on top.

Have you done an SOA (incomings and outgoings) and posted on the Debt free board, to see if they have any ideas where you could save?

KiKi

alis74 wrote: »

My ll will do nothing, I am so sick of handing over money to live like this. My dd is suffering as well. I know I have a house (but told not entitled to legal aid) so my husband is just sitting laughing (I just cant pay a solicitor and just can't find one who could at least help and take payment from sale of house) total Catch 22.

I just feel like telling my ll at the end of the month sorry I have lost my job, will be applying for housing benefit and just take the money as a deposit for someone else, yes wrong but I have had enough

Hi OP

I'm so sorry to hear of your problems. Can I suggest that you repost any LL specific problems on the Buying and Selling thread where there are some really brilliant experts in dealing with problem LLs. They will be able to give you some great advice.

KiKi

alis74

Thanks Spendless. The solicitor was good, she had seen cases like mine before. Told her everything and as my husband can't be found she said that they can get private investigators (imagine!) and such to find him along with notices in a local paper (the area in which his family live, and where I feel he has always been in the last few years - I did tell the CSA this numerous times). If that does not work the court can force a sale anyway. If I go for a divorce she said that a judge would more or less award the proceeds to dd and I anyway and give dd a settlement of some sorts.

Problem is legal aid said no, and I just can't afford a solicitor so feel totally and utterly shafted by husband and in my state of mind at the moment just worthless. I actually wish I didn't know that I have a property.

At present the accomodation we are in right now is really pulling dd and I down I can't believe I was stupid enough to take it (everything was glossed over/hidden by landlady). Luckily I have not signed a contract and luckily right now I have 1 months rent in my bank account........ so my decision is made in that aspect. My dd has had enough.

As for work since being made redundant a few years ago I never regained my confidence ahd have been temping for the health trust for almost 3 years, in varying positions and Bands. I have applied for a few jobs within the trust but on waiting list each time. I also have applied for a lot of work in the private sector everything and anything really. I just hope something comes up soon, because to be honest that is all I need a permanent post would help dd and I so much.

I am at the end of my tether, I can just about give dd what she needs and as for me I work so hard (and this sounds so ungrateful so apologies) but as a girl I am embarrassed with my appearance and not having had new clothes make-up etc for a long long time, I get so upset at this I used to be such a proud person.

I have thought about giving up work altogether but as I am in private rental how would I pay rent each month even with housing benefit there wouldn't be enough to make up the shortfall. And I have lived in a women's aid house many years ago when I left my husband and I vowed (even though they were excellent) that my dd would never live like that again. So that option is gone.

p.s I am not entitled to housing benefit although I receive ctc and wtc

Sorry again for the great big post, but it is actually therapeutic!

make_me_wise

alis74 wrote: »

I am at the end of my tether, I can just about give dd what she needs and as for me I work so hard (and this sounds so ungrateful so apologies) but as a girl I am embarrassed with my appearance and not having had new clothes make-up etc for a long long time, I get so upset at this I used to be such a proud person.

I think you should be extremely proud of yourself, of how hard you work to provide for your daughter and mainly, that despite all you have been through, you are standing on your own two feet and have kept going. There are many of us, myself especially, who could not have coped in your circumstances.

I wish I could offer more solutions to you but just wanted to give you a well deserved pat on the back for doing so well and giving your daughter a wonderful role model.

merlin68

How much is your rent and council tax, you really should be getting HB and CTC on your income. Have you been to CAB.

alis74

Yes Merlin, I have tried and applied for everything. I dont pay council tax as I live in NI and I am not entitled to housing benefit.

CAB no use, they only told me I need a solicitor. I could scream

pigpen

If the solicitor forces a sale of the hosue they can just take their fees from the equity there.. so finding the money wouldnt be an issue.. unless the house is in negative equity.. if you jointly own the house you are entitled to know how much is left on the mortgage and you can check out roughly how much houses are going for in that area to get some idea of equity.

Badger the CSA.. they dont like it and they move themselves a bit faster if they are kicked frequently... Government agencies are like donkeys.. they either need carrots or hitting with a stick!

When did you last apply for housing benefit? Did you appeal?

If you are getting working tax credit (not the child tax credit!!) you should be entitled to get something towards your rent and CT..

Also.. if you write to your LL saying she has X amount of time to get the work done as agreed before you took the tenancy otherwise you will have the work done and send her the bill! If it is structural work or damaging to health you are entitled to do this.. but again you need to speak to that solicitor.

January20

alis74 wrote: »

January yes it is me, just so down I felt like becoming a newbie! Merlin I am not entitled to Housing benefit at all I put in a claim but no I get nothing. I do get wtc and ctc all of that goes on the rent and some of my wages as well (I only get paid above the minimum also) my wages go up and down each week as some weeks I would do 30 hrs and some 40.

I am totally and utterly overwhelmed. My ll will do nothing, I am so sick of handing over money to live like this. My dd is suffering as well. I know I have a house (but told not entitled to legal aid) so my husband is just sitting laughing (I just cant pay a solicitor and just can't find one who could at least help and take payment from sale of house) total Catch 22.

I just feel like telling my ll at the end of the month sorry I have lost my job, will be applying for housing benefit and just take the money as a deposit for someone else, yes wrong but I have had enough

I'm sorry Alis, I didn't want to blow your cover! I thought you might have forgotten your login details and I knew that a lot of questions would be asked, questions that you had already answered in your previous thread. I remembered your thread because I was so stunned by your story and I am so sorry your situation has got worse!

I think you have had a big shock learning about the property. It has stirred up feelings that you could possibly do without, and I think that is probably why you are feeling so low at the moment. You have a house that you partly own and no doubt would like to benefit from, yet live in not so nice rented accommodation. It must be frustrating to be in that position, with some much potentially and so many obstacles in the way. Take time to look after yourself. Post on the Housing board about your ll, you could also post a statement of affairs on the dfw board to see if you could make some savings anywhere to pay for the solicitor and don't despair. It may take time but there will be a way out of this situation.

alis74

Pigpen - I have tried and failed and again recently tried again for housing benefit no luck!!!!

January thanks for your post, you got it, it is stirring up so many emotions.

I am not going to ask my landlady to do anything or go to environmental health (I live in N.I) I am not on a death wish, I am just going to get out of the disgusting place. I feel she seen me coming someone shy and who wouldn't say boo - I asked her so many times to do something but no. While I still work and do my absolute best for dd I am just going to leave (again some may say morally wrong but I will be using the rent on a deposit for a decent home and believe me I know now for sure what to look out for) landlady can find (or try to) find some other eejit, we cant cope in the place any longer and my dd has had enough

I am going to keep looking for a solicitor who can get an order to sell my house. I contacted the bank and there is equity

alis74

I just thought i would post. I have found my husband, i sat on the internet for an awful long time. The reason as I suspected is that he is in the ROI. Found a picture of him in google images, in a paper as entrepreneur of the year, vanity what can i say.

I am so angry how dear he treat dd like that, just dont know what now. I definitely do not want to take him for every penny he has but he has a duty to help dd.