Not sure whether to back out of this?

Jariya

Hello,

Right..I do know that you'll probably laugh at this question....

I've recently had some emergency plumbing work done by a great lad who I got in touch with via a mutual friend.
He was very professional and did a great job - it was in his own time and I got 'mate's rates' for the work - all now complete and I'm very happy with it all.

He had to take out a lot of my pipe casing and rip tiles out etc plus partof my kitchen ceiling had to go too in order to do the repairs.
He could see from my attitude of 'yep - knock a hole in it - there's no other way to get it fixed' that I am no DIY-er! Haha!

So, he told me of a guy he knows who can do patch up work and who isn't currently working who would be happy for the work.

This guy came round Thursday evening, I had got in from work late and was shattered and just wanted to get my dinner on and get a quote sorted quickly.
He ended up being here for about half an hour or so just to take a look at two areas which need work in my kitchen and bathroom.
He was very chatty and asked lots of questions about me. He even ended up singing and dancing at one point (?).
He started asking more questions about me and I kinda stopped him and asked if I could have the quote for the work as it had been a long day and I was starving.
He looked a bit offended but then stood and had another look, thought about it for a few mins and then gave me a quote for labours and materials which was fine so I agreed.

We then went on to discuss when the work would be done - he can't do weekends as he is renovating a church at the moment so asked for key access for this week.
I'm not happy with a stranger being in my house while I'm not there so suggested 19th Sept as I will be off work for a week.
This was all fine.

He then started asking me more questions about me but at this point was no longer talking to my face but was basically talking to my chest and 'scanning' the rest of me.

I cut the conversation short again and went to the front door to show him out.

I am now feeling creeped out and did as soon as he began scanning me!

I'm thinking do I just go with this and get it done for a price I can afford and it will only be a day and a half of work with me here or do I get some other quotes.

I'm single, live alone and don't have any family or anyone who could be around with me when he arrives to do the work.
As soon as he left I started thinking 'make up a 6ft rugby player boyfriend and go and buy a hugely unattractive fleece to wear when he is here'!!!

I also feel a bit bad if I just back out of the 'verbal' agreement.

My instinct tells me I don't want the guy in my house again though.

What would you do?

Mojisola

Jariya wrote: »

My instinct tells me I don't want the guy in my house again though.

I always go with my instinct on matter like this.

He may have in mind that you're going to make up the difference between mate's rates and the real price some other way!

nickj_2

phone him and say you've had an unexpected bill and can't afford to have the work done , and then get someone you are happy with ,

Jariya

Mojisola wrote: »

I always go with my instinct on matter like this.

He may have in mind that you're going to make up the difference between mate's rates and the real price some other way!

Er...that just absolutely turned my stomach!

:eek: I feel sick!

Nickj - thanks - I felt quite stupid posting this up here today - the only excuse I had been able to think of was that someone else could do the work next weekend....your idea is a far better one!
It can be hard to think of a simple alternative when you're in teh situation yourself!

I think I will avoid calling - but will text him tomorrow..with Nick's excuse!

evoke

Jeez. Back out of it.

How many warning signs do you need?

Jariya

andrew-b wrote: »

A man with a wandering eye..there's a first!!

are you not flattered that he finds u attractive?
Was he good looking? Sounds like a cheerful bloke if his singing and dancing...better than having some old grumpy git working in the house!

Or ask sarah beeny as she's quite upfront!? ...yeah cheap gag though she does run a dating website too (mysinglefriend) haha! I get your vulnerability but you never know you might end up married with kids...and you'll have someone who'll do all the jobs around the house! For what it's worth my wife and i met via online dating...went on a first date and she never let me home ( i could have been an axe murderer for all she knew!!)..now i'm married to her with a lovely little baby boy who is laying on me snoozing at mo and I do all the diy jobs as well as most the cleaning !!

Of course if your concerned about mixing business with pleasure you could cancel the job and suggest he takes you to a nice restaurant for dinner instead? MSE as it means you get a free dinner right and who knows where it might lead!

Perhaps you should ask for a reference from the church his renovating?

If you feel uncomfortable around this bloke though then cancel. But if you go ahead...urm...take precautions (that could be read so many ways in the context of this thread!!).... can you not ask the mutual friend you mention to come round? Any neighbours who can pop in? Or work colleagues.

I'm not attracted to the guy.
He came to do a quote for work and nothing more than that.

DVardysShadow

nickj wrote: »

phone him and say you've had an unexpected bill and can't afford to have the work done , and then get someone you are happy with ,

I don't like using porkies in this situation. The entirely predictable response if the guy conforms to the stereotype we have in mind will be 'Not a problem, I know you have the time off work, so I'll do the job and you can pay me {later, in kind}'.

Just ask whether any materials have been bought. If they have, then offer to pay for them if they are brought round and sight of receipts given. Deal with that first, then say, you don't want the job done. And don't discuss.

anotherbaldrick

Just give him the elbow, if he asks why tell him .

Jariya

Maybe it's just me?
I don't quite 'get' why paying someone to do work in your house has anything to do sex or dating or payment in kind?

'Fraid I don't find men who speak to my chest then my stomach, hips and legs all very noticeably and slowly terribly respectful - there's ways and ways of looking at people and sorry but for me actions speak louder.

I'm totally not averse to a bit of banter but in this case...blimey! I can do better than that! Haha!
^^^ seeing as we are at that level I may as well join in! *grins*

Anyway - it's done..and I ended up making up my own excuse following DVardy's post.

evoke

If you're fit i'll do the work for free if I can rummage around in your knicker-drawer. LOL. LOL. LOL.

Smick100

Speaking as a guy, but also as a consumer, I'd advise you to get someone else to do it.

As you alluded to earlier, this guy 'needs the work', by giving him your custom you help him out.

From sole traders right to the largest corporations, if you don't like how they do things then spend your hard-earned with someone who you wish to benefit from it.