Bridesmaid dresses - Advice please

tryingtobetheperfectHW

I thought the biggest issue would be my dress, but it seems I am getting far more stressed about my bridesmaids!

I'm getting married in September next year, and have 5 bridesmaids. Ranging in height from 5 foot to about 5'9 and size 6 - 18.

I'm panicking that not only am I not going to be able to find a style that suits them all, but when to buy them.

I of course want to scour the shops now, and start trying to find some good deals, as this is probably not something I can get off faithful eBay.

A couple of girls have said the want to lose weight, when do you think I can realistically say right we by dresses now, and you better fit in it by Sept?

I've got a £50 for each dress, so I'm hoping I could get some nice ones for that much.

Also I want to try sell the dresses on after, do you think it's rude to say, give me the dresses back?

I've never been a bridesmaid so not sure what the done thing is.

I think these dresses are going to be the hardest part of the whole thing!!

bargainhuntress_2

Tough one - just a thought... how about you choose a dress fabric and get dresses made for each individual - so they may not be identical in style, but have the same theme?

I'm going back years, but I recall Laura Ashley used to sell dress fabric as well as dresses... maybe get a couple off the peg and have the others made? May work out expensive though......

Giddytimes

tryingtobetheperfectHW wrote: »

A couple of girls have said the want to lose weight, when do you think I can realistically say right we by dresses now, and you better fit in it by Sept?

Also I want to try sell the dresses on after, do you think it's rude to say, give me the dresses back?

I've never been a bridesmaid so not sure what the done thing is.

I've been a bridesmaid twice and both times I've given the dress back for the bride to sell. I don't think this will be an issue.

I would offer them the option early on to say pay for 50% of the dress themselves and keep it afterwards or you'll pay for the whole thing but would like the dress back so you can sell it.

I'd say it is too early now to buy the dresses if some of them want to lose weight, you have to give them chance otherwise you might end up with dress alterations to pay for, maybe April/May next year would be reasonable? If they start now that's plenty of time. I agree though that you need to put a deadline on it early on.

RainbowDrops

£50 is a tight budget to get 5 dresses in different sizes if you want to go down the ebay / preloved route. Although I while back I remember a few brides used someone off ebay who made cheap dresses that seemed to go down wel - hopefuly someone else remembers.

I agree with gidddy - now is too soon to buy, but I think you shoud set a date to go shopping next year so it gives the dieters a deadline.

I actually didn't get my BM dresses till about 2 months before the wedding as my sis was pregnant. It worked out ok for me as I went highstreet & didn't have a colour scheme or theme.
A sept wedding means you might get lucky in the sales though.

double_mummy

why not ebay??

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Roman-Originals-Silver-Maxi-Dress-Detail-/280718772523?pt=UK_Women_s_Dresses&var=&hash=item870cfec0f8#ht_945wt_1139

dont know your theme or colour but just to show you it can be done

this is from a proper shop and is part of the fashion outlet on ebay which are brill!!!!

personally i wouldnt buy until july august time (im getting married the month after you and im getting mine august september)

im in the exact same situatino mine are between 5'2 and 5'10 and a size 4 to size 20

ellay864

Do they really have to be in the same style? Surely you want bridesmaids that will look good in a style that suits them and complement you. I remember seeing some friends wedding photos recently...the bride is a size 10 and wore a strapless dress with a fairly simple skirt style. 3 of her 4 bridesmaids were similar size to her and wore simple strapless dresses, again fairly straight with a very small hint of A line. The 4th bridesmaid was a much larger lady and was wearing the same style dress - it really didn't suit her, she looked uncomfortable in it and in photos the attention was dragged away from the bride to this poor girl who just looked an obvious misfit.
I'd agree with bargainhuntress - go for same/similar fabrics or colours and find styles they suit. You haven't said what ages they are but what looks great on a 25yr old might look wrong on a 13yr old. It may simply be a case of simple strapless for the younger/slimmer ones, and allowing others to wear a bolero jacket or have a wrap. I think that different but coordinating bridesmaids can look really good - cloning can look a bit boring and just doesn't work if your BMs are all different ages, shapes and sizes

codemonkey

I got mine from this seller on ebay
http://stores.ebay.co.uk/huiyunkitty

They're great for the money but it does take ages for them to arrive.

spurs_gal

As my bridesmaids are all different heights, sizes and like different styles they are choosing their own. Obviously I will have the final say! lol. But they are going for high street dresses to go with my color theme (black and white) They are all going to be knee length but styles are all different. The ones my bridesmaids have been looking at are:
http://www.bonprixsecure.com/uk/Dress-3907001-style.htm?sk=6
http://www.bonprixsecure.com/uk/Formal-dress-3925175-style.htm;jsessionid=F3186EE660AA577898D3BB3CA353B504?bpsid=1709855608449481189-0-4e385ade&sk=6
http://www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10001_10001_008010435885_-1?breadcrumb=Home~Women~Dresses
That way they will all be happy and comfortable and I think that way they will enjoy the day more - which is ultimately what I want. They have some lovelly dresses on ebay for less than £30. Hth.

squ1rrel5

I agree with some of the other posts - I would definitely go for the same colour but in different styles depending on what suits the individual BM - my friend had 5 BM's at her wedding and did this and they all looked beautiful. Each having different dresses really made each one look gorgeous individually (and together) without looking like a clone of each other.

I was BM a few years ago for my friend, there were two of us - The other girl was about 5 foot tall and a size 8. I am a lot taller and a size 16 (with huge boobs). The bride put us both in matching dresses and unfortunately it was to my disadvantage.
It was a strapless dress with no built in corset and unfortunately I had to spend the whole day trying to pull it up in case my boobs were exposed! It was a close call on many occasions!

The grooms mates were all idiots anyway but after they'd had a few drinks they kept on staring down my top and making comments about me falling out of my dress (this was in front of the bride too - how embarassing). Needless to say I spent the whole of the wedding feeling horrendously uncomfortable, and by the end of the day and a few glasses of champagne later I was just really upset about all the comments that were being made about my boobs spilling over!! (sounds funny now but it really wasnt at the time). :rotfl:
Having seen the photos since, my boobs take centre stage more so than the bride and groom and I'm sure I must have affected the brides day although she's too polite to say so.
Not my fault but the dress was just a huge issue from start to finish!!
I'm BM again in a few weeks and this time the bride has taken our figures into consideration (I am still the same shape) and I have the most beautiful dress that accentuates my figure and I am not going to worry about exposing myself!!!! I will feel much more comfortable on the day and I hope this will lead to the bride enjoying herself without having to worry about a half naked bridesmaid!!!!

I know its your day, but you will feel much happier knowing that your bridesmaids look good and feel comfortable with what they are wearing!!

tryingtobetheperfectHW

Thank you all so much.

I must add budget is £50 a dress, I a huge baragin hunter, but even I'm not sure I could do it for £10 each.

Thankfully there all roughly the same age 23-25, so there won't be a problem with dressing them too young or too old for their age.

I have thought about giving them all different dresses, but I'd want to the colours to match exactly, and I'm not sure I could handle the stress of that.

Thank you for advising on a time scale, I will aim to go shopping in June / July.

I must admit I am dreading the day. I really worry about how the larger bridesmaid is going to feel, I'm not exactly petite myself, although slimming world is working its magic, and sometime when I am out with my friends I do feel quite fat around them, and thats when we are in different clothes.

I just don't want her too look at the other bridesmaids and be upset on my wedding.

Maybe same dresses aren't the best option. Arghhhh I just don't know.

Those that had different dresses for your wedding, how did it go? Did you match colours or just have the same family of colours?

ellay864

Once when I was a bridesmaid 2 of us had identical turquoise dresses, the other 2 who were older had darker blue dresses with turquoise sashes. That looked really good. You could use colour accents. It also depends on what your colour scheme is. Something like cadbury purple is really popular and there's loads in that colour, or bright cerise pink. But if you're looking at teal for example it's harder to get exact matches.
But remember if the dresses themselves are a bit different anyway, maybe different styles or fabrics, then it matters a bit less if the colours aren't exactly identical. I've seen some pictures where a colour family was used and it made it look really nice and individual while maintaining the theme