Employee Confidentiality

SarEl

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

??? What direction - that of people having differing opinions?

I'm happy to be the only one standing up saying they would be fuming. Nobody has said that they don't agree that the OP has a right to be annoyed / fuming / whatever - the differences are about whether it is best to act out of anger and quite possibly make things worse or not. I don't have any problem with the world and his wife going against me saying that they would get over it and move on. For one, SarEl reported a poster on here earlier this week for merely suggesting that their motives were not honorable No. I reported a poster for personal and uncalled for abuse on a public forum. And since the poster that I reported was in fact Eskimo, aren't you being a little disingenous saying that you don't know to whom the others are referring? Although I have to agree with you that I do not think that you are Eskimo and this is simply a difference of opinion that has got somewhat out of hand - perhaps illustrating the extent to which the OP may wish to consdier how far out of hand their own situation may get? and I would put a shiny pound coin on SarEl and others not putting up with the sort of behaviour from a previous employer [not having a go - it's just a recent happening so is fresh in my mind] - so I do find it a little bizarre that people are saying to just move on when they would probably not do so themselves...
Since I am self employed I doubt that you would win your shiny pound! But I think you are still missing the point - what exactly is "this sort of behaviour"? The employer has done nothing that is apparently unlawful or wrong. If anyone has breached confidentality it is the OP's friend. just because this is a forum and the tendency is to 'have a go' at OPs for asking what really is a pertinent question regarding confidentiality.

I think it is unfair to say that anyone has had a go at the OP for asking the question. I certainly didn't and I don't see that anyone else has either. What each of us has said is that there is nothing realistically that the OP can do about this, that doing anything may make things a lot worse for everyone, and that most of us may accept that we would be annoyed, but we do not agree with your opinion as to what to do about that.

I am going to say this again - the person who breached confidentiality is the OP's friend. We have no idea why the employer responded in the way they did to their grievance but it does appear likely that the OP's friend opened up this line of argument. In "publishing" a communication that was confidential and relevant only to the grievance they had with the employer, the OP's friend has left themselves wide open for gross misconduct. If the OP reappears here in three weeks saying "My wife's friend is on a gross misconduct allegation because s/he breached confidentiality..." what is the advice going to be then?

DD54

Hi everyone thanks for the responses - I have asked the third party to provide the statement she has been given before I decide what to do. I feel that all I can really do is write a strongly worded letter to teh HR department - of course I could mention the organisation however that is not for this forum.

Thanks for your help and sorry if it stirred up some heated emotions

CFC

Hi OP - just to point out that Jarndyce and Sar El are correct, so do bear in mind that if your friend provides a written statement to your wife, and your wife complains, the friend could potentially be looking at a disciplinary; and thus be an ex friend.
Probably the best way of tackling it is in fact to walk away.