family chasing me for money..

unhappytinkerbell

Hi all
I really need some help and guidance so any would be gratefully received!

History: My father gave me some money as early inheritance. Some came from his savings and I used towards a house and the remaining money he took a loan in his name to pay off my ex husband and I transfer him money each month to cover it. I have also held power of attorney for him for the last 6 years but not had anything to do with it.

I have received a letter from a solicitor claiming I took the loan out pretending to be him and that they want it paid off, in addition he has now remarried and revoked my POA and given it to his new wife and they would like the money paid back within 2 weeks that he gave me for my house!

We have nothing in writing with regards to the money and obviously the loan isnt in my name so I cant see why or how they can get away with this?

Im not sure what to write back with? My big concern is my father last year was diagnosed with dementia and has a history of mental illness should i write asking for proof that he has full mental capacity in relation to his financies?

The final part of the letter says says that if i dont pay they have been advised by their client (my Dad!!) to proceed with recovery proceedings and then its list things like bailiffs to recover goods to repay the amount!!!

Pretty shocked that my own father would do this .. any advice??? The amount they want in 2 weeks is £60000 :rotfl:

Hovel_lady

Not sure what to recommend except see/ring a solictor. They often have free half hour advice sessions.
Good luck x

Emmzi

Wifey is trying it on, obviously.

I am assuming your signature etc is in no way on the loan agreement. And that your dad has nothing from you saying the house money was a loan not as gift?

Just write back explaining what you have said - that your dad gifted you the money for the house and that he also lent you an amount of money which as can be seen from the regular payments you are making to him in accordance with the loan agreement HE took out, you are repaying to him as agreed. Clearly there is no evidence that the house money was ever meant to be a loan, because it wasn't; and there was no fradulent application because if they check with the bankl, no paperwork was ever in your name and you will be happy to undertake formal handwriting analysis for adjudication by a suitabley qualified independent third party agreed by you both, at your father's cost.

At that point wifey will realise you are not daft and gave to decide how much she wants to spend pursuing a fruitless case. It will probably die a death at that point.

ceridwen

I also think the wife is putting him up to this and agree that you need to make it very plain that the gift really is a gift and the agreement as to repayment of loan specifies whatever timespan it does specify as to when it is to be repaid.

Before I got as far as seeing he has dementia - I was wondering if this is what the problem is - ie his dementia (rather than him per se iyswim) "playing up".

The new wife looks to have married him with the intention of grabbing everything she can from him - well she is going to be "up the swanee" then if he ever has to go into a carehome. Wonder if she has protected herself from the roof over her head being grabbed if/when he has to? (ie got a "tenants in common" document - instead of that more common arrangement for married couples - of which I cant recall the name).

Maybe she is trying to grab your money off you because she has just realised that she is pretty unprotected for keeping the marital home if/when he goes into a Home and she figures that if she grabs back the money he gave you towards your home then she can find some way to "ringfence it off" towards HER future needs. I expect the urgent nature of the demand is because she hadnt realised quite how ill your father is until she was actually married to him (I've certainly seen someone I know ITRW manage to "hold things together" JUST long enough until after they had remarried...:cool:).

I say this - because I often find that the way to figure out what someone will do next is to have worked out their motives for what they have done to date - and then one can usually figure out their next step..

Gordon_Hose

The onus is on your Father to prove the money wasn't a gift.

unhappytinkerbell

Hi all and thank you for your replies - was pretty much what I was thinking so thats good.

In response: HE took out the loan and its paid out of HIS bank, I just transfer him some money each month, there is nothing with my signature on etc and all paperwork is in his name at his address.

With regards to the house money, he gave it me as a gift and there is nothing in writing, no charge on property, so yes I think they are trying it on. He does have a history of mental illness and was sectionned several times (but over 15 yrs ago) up until recently (prior to meeting new "strange" wife he used to call me every day threatening to kill himeself and I said enough was enough I couldnt deal with this kind of emotional blackmail!

Just goes to show that blood isnt thicker than water!!

With regards to the other comment made, he has emailed my brother advising he has written me out of the will and is leaving a house to my brother in spain which my brother has to allow new Wife to live in until she dies!

theoretica

Was he mentally fit to revoke the PoA? I am really sorry he is in this state, mental illness is hard in a family.

unhappytinkerbell

I agree and its something ive questionned in my letter back.. can they prove he has capacity to make decisions relating to his financial affairs.. he is a vulnerable adult in his state and I accept that and who knows who is taking advantage of him but its so sad that he feels it necessary to get solicitors to send me a letter saying ive used the POA to take money which I havent!!!

kingfisherblue

Apart from questioning whether your father is mentally fit enough to revoke the POA, was he mentally fit enough to marry? If he has dementia, it could be that he has been 'persuaded' to marry this woman - and surely then the question would be whether the marriage is indeed legal.

unhappytinkerbell

Good point I didn't think of that either! They did marry within two months of meeting!

kingfisherblue

unhappytinkerbell wrote: »

Good point I didn't think of that either! They did marry within two months of meeting!

I have no idea what you can do about this, but surely there must be some sort of safeguard in place for vulnerable adults? Or is that just wishful thinking?

I don't really know enough about it, but some people with mental health problems can be very suggestible (I think that's the word) - by this I mean that they can be convinced of something that isn't necessarily true.

I think I would consider speaking to Social Services or AgeUK for advice on how to proceed. Either of these will presumably be able to advise, or signpost you to the appropriate authorities. You might also want to contact any dementia charities for further advice.

Money aside, I do hope that your dad is ok and not being manipulated - and that if he is, it is sorted out promptly. As you had POA, you will probably be aware of income, expenditure and savings - I don't know whether SS could get a court order to investigate whether anything has changed since your dad's marriage (such as savings being depleted at an unusually fast rate).

Good luck with getting everything sorted.