CSA/ Mortgage shortfall from ex...please help

piana84

Hi, this is my first ever post and im really hoping someone can help me.

OK basically my ex has got me into alot of debt and i am struggling to see a way out.
We bought a house in November 2005 together, our daughter was born in December 2006 and by November 2008 i couldnt take anymore and me and my daughter moved out.
My ex used to go out every night and get drunk and never really saw his daughter, we had a joint account that we both put money into to pay mortgage/ utility bills but he used to take the card from my purse and nearly rinse the account dry, and even on occasion took my bank card. i struggled for months trying to keep our heads above water until i had had enough.
Me and DD moved into private rented as i wasnt entitled to a council property, my ex wouldnt let me sell the house as it was his home aswell and he wanted to stay living there. He actually paid the mortgage for a few months and i thought things were ok till i got a phone call in Feb 2010 saying that the mortage hadnt been paid since Sept 2009!

Long story short i forced the house on the market but it was repossesed before i could sell. November 2010 it was sold at auction, resulting in a mortgage shortfall of £59000 :eek:

Ex refused to help me pay, as it was a joint mortgage we are both liable but as long as they are getting some money they wont chase him.
I have had to enter into a debt management plan as i am a single mum working part time, an IVA was refused, and all creditors have practically refused the offer from payplan. This debt will take me over 20 years to pay off so you can imagine how much disposable income i actually have.

To top it all off i went to the CSA over 18 months ago, managed to get one payment then nothing.
Latest update is my case has gone to the Criminal Intervention thing and an investigator will pay him a visit.
He owes me £651 in arrears already and refuses to help me or give me anything.

Im at the end of my tether, im really struggling and dont know what to do anymore.
THis whole thing is stressing me out so much.

Ive considered just declaring myself bankrupt but i really didnt want to, ive fought so hard to avoid that route but i just see any other option.

Can i take him to court and force him to help me pay half of the shortfall? He is working full time but i believe its cash in hand as the CSA cant find any records on him.

moneypuddle

Aw hun this must be such a stressful situation for you. I'm not in a position to advise you at all but from my (brief) experience of the CSA they are pretty good at catching up with non-paying parents.

Good luck to you. I hope someone can help soon.

DS4215

So, you are in private rented, own nothing and owe a big chunk of £60000? If he won't pay then you will end up paying the lot, and it looks like you can't count on any CSA.

Unless you want to carry on like this for the next 20 years, then you need to do something drastic. Lottery wins are unlikely (not impossible though) and you might be lucky enough to marry a footballer (do you live near Essex?), but failing that, banruptcy isn't ideal, but it can't be any worse than now. And you'll be clear a lot quicker than trying to pay it back!

Hobo17

I know you said you don'twant to go bankrupt... but what is your housing situation? do you work in a job that is likely to be affected by bankruptcy? I did it a few years back and as guilty as i felt about turning my back on those debts, the relief was indescribable. Really my life didn't change at all, i had to get a new bank account and tell my landlord who couldn't care less as I had always paid my rent on time. My work didn't care as I have nothing to do with money or finances. I do still have to pay a small sum to the OR for another few months but that is proportionate to my income and it was stopped when I wasn't working. Have you posted a statement of affairs (incomings and outgoings) on the debt board here?

If bankruptcy really isn't the way forward for you then I wouldn't worry too much that your payment offer has been refused. I expect Payplan will tell you to keep paying it anyway and in the end the debts will get sold onto other agencies who will probably accept. Is your CSA income included in the figures that Payplan used to calculate how much you could afford?

piana84

Thanks for the replies,
I am seriously considering bankruptcy but am worried about my job, i dont have a financial position and am technically employed as an Administrative Assistant but i assist with the departmental budget with our financial controller, i raise all purchase orders for the department and have a corporate credit card which i use for booking travel etc.

Would my job be at risk?

I live in private rented, i dont think my landlord would be too bothered as i have always paid my rent on time.

If only it was me that won the Euromillions this week lol

RAS

Hi

Were you married or not?

piana84

No we werent married

peachyprice

piana84 wrote: »

Thanks for the replies,
I am seriously considering bankruptcy but am worried about my job, i dont have a financial position and am technically employed as an Administrative Assistant but i assist with the departmental budget with our financial controller, i raise all purchase orders for the department and have a corporate credit card which i use for booking travel etc.

Would my job be at risk?

I live in private rented, i dont think my landlord would be too bothered as i have always paid my rent on time.

If only it was me that won the Euromillions this week lol

Your job would only be at risk if it were a FSA registered position or if it says in your contract you would be dismissed for bankruptcy.

It shouldn't have any effect on a corporate CC as the account isn't yours, it's your companies.

Pop over to the bankruptcy board, the people there are lovely. They'll give you loads of advice and support and help you decide whether it's something to seriously consider.

RAS

piana84 wrote: »

No we werent married

Pity, as a divorce settlement would alsmost certainly have required him to take on a high percentage fo the debt.

Do you have a union at work? Can the rep talk to your emplyer about the situation and check their attitude to BR?

THE BR forum has certainly had a number of people who are bank employees who have gone BR and retained their jobs; one even whose in-house debt advisor recommended the action and supported her despite her owing money to the bank.

piana84

We dont have a union but do have a third party company that offers advice etc (first assist).
I have thought about speaking to them rather than going to see our HR department as was worried that once i discussed it with them they may use it against me.

I have posted on the Bankruptcy board and asked for some advice from the CCCS advisors, hopefully i will hear back soon

RAS

Best of luck. it might serve your ex right if this was to bite him in the bum.