Remembrance Table?

Hollie84

Bride2be24 what a beautiful table and you looked gorg

Scotsbride

We're not having a remembrance table but I'm having a blue wedding cake which I promised my late gran I would do for her before she passed away. I'm also going to wear her sapphire necklace as my something blue so I feel she will still be there on the day with me

Bride2be24

Hollie84 wrote: »

Bride2be24 what a beautiful table and you looked gorg

awww thank you

3v3

A wedding day is a special day to celebrate the new life of two people being joined together.
Personally, I wouldn't even consider a "rememberance" display at such an event. On the one hand, it comes across as nothing more than a "showy" display (truly, if you believe your deceased loved one is included because of candle/picture, then surely you believe they will be there with you in spirit anyway, without any trappings?) Secondly, it could be insensitive to some guests.

Each to their own, and I mean no disrepect by going against the tide with my opinion, but I can see why you might be getting the morbid/freaky responses.

littlecat29

Im also battling with this one - i lost my mum 9 years ago and i have no idea how i am going to actually get through the day without her.. My OH has lost his dad and his brother also.
I dont really think i want the photo's of my mum next to a candle as im sure that will make me cry all the more, i know that am going to take her a corsage up the cemetry on the morning of my wedding to put on her grave and im really hoping that i will do my tears then as i whell up a lot when i think of her and so i dont think that the photo/ candle idea is for me.
I do however like the above poem which may be the way for me - i think it will also have meaning to others at our wedding who have lost a loved one.
All in all i think it is a very personal decision... gosh im crying again now!

wanchai_2

I am also struggling with this, having lost my granny, dad and a good friend. Not sure what to do.

I was thinking that we could have photos of me and OH from throughout our lives, including friends and family. Then they would all be there in photos, but in a more discreet way. Meaningful to those who matter iykwim. Will have a chat to my mum and OH to see what they think.

MaggieBaking

I don't think it's morbid. I've heard of people having lockets with loved ones in, and small picture frames attached to bouquets.

On our day we raised a toast to those loved ones who had passed and couldn't be with us, it's my favourite moment of the whole day.

I personally think a table full of photos, including missed family members is a lovely idea.

Idiophreak

Sorry to say I'm another erring on the morbid / freaky side...It just seems a really weird thing to do.

I absolutely understand that people want to remember their loved ones on their wedding day...But I think you can do that without setting up a mini-shrine.

Personally, I think my granddad was the only person I really missed on the day - and he was so much in my thoughts, and in my heart, that I didn't need anything physical to remember him.

I do quite like the idea of a display of photos, though...to celebrate your lives both apart and together...with both those alive and deceased. That seems quite a positive way of achieving the same thing....

McKneff

curlylou1986 wrote: »

Hi,
We had a black metal lantern with a tea light (fake due to venue restrictions) in side and a poem next to it in a frame -

Those we love don't go away, they walk beside us everyday, unseen, but always near - still loved, still missed and very near.
This candle burns in memort of our family on this wedding day, bless us in spirit as we begin our

This candle burns in memory of our family on this wedding day, bless us in spirit as we begin our new lives together.

i personally didnt want to have photos of the people me and OH were 'remembering' because there was a bit of problem with OH's family (big fall outs, loss of people OH didnt know) - so just the message and the frame was best for us. plus it would have made me too unhappy seeing a photo of my dad everytime walked past the table, Everyone commeneted how lovely it was done though.:o
We had a photo montage going on a screen with all the photos of our relationship and from when we were younger which included the photos of my dad and OH grandad which were the two most important people we were missing on the day.
We did a family tree with a brance, tea lights and hung photos of our parents and grandparents wedding as well.

hope you find the best way for you to mark a part of rememberance for your loved ones.

I'm on the side of the morbid clan but I just love the poem and the sentiment along with the candle.

wanchai_2

Idiophreak wrote: »

Sorry to say I'm another erring on the morbid / freaky side...It just seems a really weird thing to do.

I absolutely understand that people want to remember their loved ones on their wedding day...But I think you can do that without setting up a mini-shrine.

Personally, I think my granddad was the only person I really missed on the day - and he was so much in my thoughts, and in my heart, that I didn't need anything physical to remember him.

I do quite like the idea of a display of photos, though...to celebrate your lives both apart and together...with both those alive and deceased. That seems quite a positive way of achieving the same thing....

I hope this doesn't sound insensitive but, if it was one of your parents, you may feel differently. It is different. I feel the loss of my dad a lot more than that of my granny. Most of the people attending our wedding knew, or are related to, my dad. They won't mind and, if they do, I don't care!

I am going to get tiny pegs and hang the photos on a string, just for fun, but also to remember my dad in particular. I am going to ask OH for old pics of him and his family and friends as well.