Hen Night headaches!

mystra

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

Get taxis and forget the minibus; then each set of 3 will have to pay for it themselves....and get the money for the tickets through paypal [get their email addresses and get them to pay direct] and then get the tickets up front - if they don't pay they don't get in.

well its not really a proper minibus, just a 7 seater Ford Galaxy thing, which most taxis seem to be round that way... plus hen wants us to all go up together (and drive the poor taxi driver mad!)

I doubt any of them have paypal addresses as they don't even seem to know how to use the internet very well! :9 but thanks for what is a essentially a very good idea!!

neilcrook

Accommodation if you went down that route...
Have a look on active hotels, you can find a cheap hotel from £55 for a triple room - tend to be a little bit of a dive but your out for a laugh anyway
Travelodge - 82.95 for the centre of town - triple but the South Promenade is cheaper at £75.90 (triple) - this is the only one i've stayed in - its relatively new and beside the theme park
Premier inn seems out of the way.

Its not that far north then... ha ha. Try looking on yell for those not online as they tend to be a bit cheaper.

Amsterdam would be fine but its not really that nice for a girly night out!

floss2

There are 3 Travelodges here - Central (beside North Pier), South (beside Pleasure Beach) and one beside the football club. There is a Premier Inn near the football ground too. Also, there are lots of decent hotels at the bottom of Albert Road near Debenhams, plus larger hotels such as the Barcelo Imperial, Savoy, Britannia and Hilton which you may be able to get a bargain in.

mystra

neilcrook wrote: »

Accommodation if you went down that route...
Have a look on active hotels, you can find a cheap hotel from £55 for a triple room - tend to be a little bit of a dive but your out for a laugh anyway
Travelodge - 82.95 for the centre of town - triple but the South Promenade is cheaper at £75.90 (triple) - this is the only one i've stayed in - its relatively new and beside the theme park
Premier inn seems out of the way.

Its not that far north then... ha ha. Try looking on yell for those not online as they tend to be a bit cheaper.

Amsterdam would be fine but its not really that nice for a girly night out!

see i don't think they'd be willing to pay that i think it'd be better personally! but it seems they want something for nothing... the train fare to get to Blackpool is about £22 last time i checked. I've just had to divulge the surprise to one of the other girls(she wanted to know if it was 'worth it'), and i've told her not to tell the hen... but she's thick as a plank and i bet she'll tell her by accident

i think i agree with amsterdam - i love it there but i went with my boyfriend, so not looking to go wild partying (old fart lol), but i guess its a bit odd as the party side of it does seem more geared towards stags rather than hens!

mystra

well this is just a charming finale to the story!

Just chatting to the hen, she has completely given up on the idea because of the others trying to push her about and their constant wingeing! So she said she like to go out for the day just me, her and her mum (who's ace and i wanted her to come whatever we do!). So i got my thinking cap on immediately and said we could go Blackpool for the day, and i could secretly look into staying over so we can have the night out still, plus we could just get a coach or train there and back the day after. fine.


then the hen slips in that a so-called friend has decided she wants to go for a night out on a different night (this friend wasn't even coming and is also getting married a few weeks after the hen, has treated her quite rudely and acting very competitive 'my weddings going to be better than yours' etc etc) i wont be able to come to this night until very late as i can't get anymore time off work (i've already booked a of time off for helping with the wedding that month). I feel so upset and excluded, i feel like i'm being petty but i want to be a proper part of the hen night, and this girl has just waltzed in and taken over! I thought if it came to just a local night out i could organise it to still be really special, was going to see how much limo would be to pick her up, and have all the girlie fun getting ready before hand. Now its going to be me arriving straight off the train, rushing to my mums to get ready and arriving in town about 11 and feeling shattered as i normally do in that situation. i've aready spent the money on fancy dress, not loads, but it just feels unfair on me. i know it's not about me, but it seems a little bit like a kick in the teeth, i've not let her down once about the wedding. I've paid for my own bridesmaid dress and shoes etc, ordered things off ebay for her and generally been a shoulder to cry on... just feels like i've been pushed aside by some fair-weather friend who has taken over so its convenient for her and her only.

then she said we could still do something the next day (the planned hen night day)... what, she'll be hungover and i'll be shattered? it will be a total washout (i'm not a very social hungover person and always just want MY bed lol)

Help! i don't want to add to her stress by saying something but i feel like a bit of doormat if i don't.

Curious_George_2

cant you tell the hen that you have stuff booked for the original night? and that if she wants to go out with her mate then thats fine but does it have to be the night before?
the hen maybe thinking that shes arranging her own thing with the other friend as none of her mates were coming so all plans are off if that makes sense,
tell her there is still stuff planned for you, her, mum and whoever else and do the limo/strippers/staying over thing like you wanted?

Scotsbride

Suggest that they could come to part of the day/night in blackpool if money tight or they do like other post suggested and take her out shopping in chester

abis21

Just wanted to say that I don't think your being petty. I would be mightily upset if I were in your shoes too.

I've organised my own hen do, and its been the most stressful part my a mile so far of the whole wedding and everything. Getting definate answers and numbers from people has been horrible. I'm renting a bunk barn for the weekend, so I couldn't tell people what they owed until people decided who were coming as we were all sharing the costs.

Once I had numbers, the whole thing went / is going a lot smoother. Its 2 weeks now til the event, and I have to say I'm probably not as excited as I should be over the whole thing because of all the stress I had with the numbers

Maybe the bride to be just got fed up of trying to please everyone? Not very nice for you who was helping so much I know... But it is really upsetting as a bride when people tell you that they don't like your plans or would rather do this etc (not you obviously, the other girls). Some of the people I thought would be there no matter what aren't coming to my hen. It is just *such* hard work trying to organised these things!! Muchos sympathies for you xx

flossy_splodge

I don't think you're being petty either.
The problem hinges around priorities. If you were asked to arrange the hen night then what is the B2B doing making other arrangements herself? Strikes me she is being rather selfish.
My personal feelings are, it is SO easy not to realise how others are feeling.
When the B2B or the hen night organiser gets all caught up in their 'doings' its really easy to not take account of others feeling left out or sidelined.
Maybe some of your B2B's other friends didn't really understand why it was YOU that was organising things when they live so much closer?
It's so easy to do things for the right reasons but not take into account how your actions might be leaving others feeling.

I guess in your shoes I would try and be brave and be really honest about how you're feeling. So so hard I know but what's the option? You get left feeling horrid and your mate is in the dark as to why and thinks you're just being funny.

I speak with sympathy, as I am feeling totally sidelined and left out of an upcoming wedding and it feels horrid. I doubt the person concerned is doing it on purpose but that doesn't make it hurt less.
Do you think you can try and have an upfront conversation? It's too late afterwards.
Will be thinking of you and hope you get it sorted. Hugs.:o

mystra

thanks everyone for your kind messages!


Spoke to the B2B properly on the phone about it, explained that i wont be able to come out for the friday night after a full day at work and a 3 hour train ride (i always fall asleep when i get in when i visit my mum up there!) and she said not to worry, as she doesn't want it to be the main do anyway, it turns out its more of a mini-joint hen do for the two of them, as the other girl is having her hen night abroad and B2b can't afford to go (how the hell she managed to organise that i will never know lol)

So i also came up with a plan b, i suggested that her, her mum and anyone else come to London (there is a cheap train for about £22) and stay the night at mine... i didn't suggest it before because i thought it might sound like i'm being selfish getting people to come to me... but the fact is there is so much to do here and a free bed for the night, and the earlier they come, the more of a whole day we can make of it. She loves the idea! She'd like something a bit quieter with just me her and her mum and she has always wanted to see a show - so that's the entertainment sorted pretty easily! There is an Adonis Cabaret here but it is more expensive so will see if i can find something similar for less money and doesn't require us to be there all night.... sigh of relief indeed!

Just broke the news to my boyfriend tho... he's packing his bags now to escape the madness!!! :rotfl::rotfl: i was kind and offered him his train fare mind! :A

hopefully - it'll be 'alright on the night!' :j:j

thanks for letting me have a moan !