stuck - do i sell?

ihopeitsme

in brief: (!)

split up with partner over a year ago. i have stayed in our house with our 2 very young children,we have a joint mortgage.
he still pays over half of mortgage, although never been a father to kids and only sees them around once every 2 weeks. time has come to cut ties and sell. but valuation on house is 18 thousand less than what we bought it for, and 22 grand less if i include what we borrowed! I looked into renting it out but have to have paid 15% off mortgage, which we havent done as its been interest only.
I have thought if i put it on for what i paid and just hope for 6 grand debt each at the most......there are other houses in the area of same size for the similar prices, that ive seen advertised myself, despite what estate agents have told me. havent apprached mortgage company yet as ive now heard they can not allow me to sell it if im going to be in debt to them?? is this right? If we were to leave with a debt of this amount, how do they arrange to pay it off?? how much would it likely be a month? as i am going to have to rent a house when i move and its really expensive so im worried how ill afford rent and bills and a debt payment?! im scared of losing my house and having no where stable for me and the kids, and i feel trapped there now. The ex is getting threatening about if i was to have another man in the house etc as he is still paying towards it, making my life a misery. also my daughter will be starting school next year so i want to move quick to get her in a good catchment area, i am livid that im stuck in the house and she will have to start school somewhere i dont want her to go and then be moved when we move house! any advice would be greatly appreciated:(

GDB2222

There's no point in putting the house on the market at an inflated price. You have all the hassle of having it on the market, with occasional viewings, but no real chance of selling.

You can't sell the house without paying the mortgage off in full. In practice, the banks will sometimes be prepared to turn a bit of it into an unsecured loan, so the house can be sold, but you still have to pay off the loan.

Your ex- can't really expect you to live like a nun, can he? He has an obligation to his children, to support and house them. Surely, his best bet of getting shot of that liability is if you find another man, so I don't see what he gains by making that difficult. Maybe he wants you back?

ihopeitsme

so they wont even let me sell it if im not going to be able to pay off the whole loan? Thats even worse

If he does want me back then its only because hes at his parents house!! He cheated on me and had no time for me and the kids when we were together.....hes a "grass is greener" type! i suppose i will have to pray on that lottery win then : S

GDB2222

Like I said, they may let you take out an unsecured loan for the balance. It's his problem as much as yours. What does he suggest?

Caveat_Mortgagor

Another symptom of the delusion regarding the state of the housing market.

Your ex thinks he's providing you with a love nest. Doesnt he realise that you bought a house together that is in serious negative equity?

Tell him his payments are towards his liabilities.

Looks like you are going to be there for the time being. Get comfortable, take it off the market and if you find another bloke, make sure he has some concept facing up to his responsibilities.

G_M

as ive now heard they can not allow me to sell it if im going to be in debt to them?? is this right? If we were to leave with a debt of this amount, how do they arrange to pay it off?? how much would it likely be a month?

The mortgage is secured against the property, to 'protect' the lender. If you sell, the lender has no 'protection'. So they will insist that the mortgage is paid off when you sell.

How much is the property worth? (not dreamland price - real price!).
How much do you still owe on the mortgage?

Best solution is to get your ex to pay the difference between the two. Then you can start from scratch.

geoffky

You really need some good advice from someone like citizens advice because a big decision will have to be made because the ex might stop paying half ect and you need to be forewarned of the routes that will be available to you...good luck..