Bridesmaids dress alterations - who pays?

no1gymbunny

I've recently chosen and ordered three bridesmaid dresses from BHS. Only one of them fits, the other two will need to be returned, re-ordered in the next size up and probably taken in. Who should pay for the alterations? Should it be the bridesmaids (they're already paying for the shoes) or should it be me? Not really sure on this one! I've already had one of the bridesmaids asking if the dress really has to come from BHS. I thought that was well cheeky, but being me I didn't tell her how I felt I've already shelled out £12 to post her (too small) dress to her and now she's expecting me to pay to return it to me via post so I can return it to BHS.

lynzpower

Having been a bridesmaid a few times, I would definitely say the bride. Sorry.
And re: the postage, could she not gone and tried it on in BHS herself adn then told you what size it was, did you ask her to do this?

McKneff

Yes, me too, defo the bride.

Coulndt they send it directly to BHS with all the details on, rather than sending it back to you to send it on?

shellsuit

You should pay as it's your wedding and you want them to be bridesmaids.

As for postage costs, I'd expect you to pay for all those aswell.

I don't see why a bridesmaid should be out of pocket for what someone else wants, sorry.

no1gymbunny

I did ask her to go and try it on, but she was too busy. I'm on a budget and wanted to take advantage of the 20% off sale they had on, so after much deliberation she said to get a 10 and she'd slim into it, but it's too tight on the rib cage and you can't really lose weight from there! The postage thing was probably my fault as I'd ordered all the dresses in one go to come to my house. I'll be ordering the new one to be delivered to her nearest store (we all live spread out over the UK!).

no1gymbunny

Ok, I'll pay! Thanks for the advice. Wasn't really sure where I stood.

White_Sapphire

Whoever pays for the dress pays for the alterations, IMO. I agree with McKneff about the bridesmaid sending it directly to BHS, although I think you should pick up the tab for postage.

Could the bridesmaid perhaps take her dress to her local BHS to be exchanged? If I were a bridesmaid I would be happy to do some of the work - one of the jobs as a bridesmaid is to help the bride, after all!

Scotsbride

no1gymbunny wrote: »

I've recently chosen and ordered three bridesmaid dresses from BHS. Only one of them fits, the other two will need to be returned, re-ordered in the next size up and probably taken in. Who should pay for the alterations? Should it be the bridesmaids (they're already paying for the shoes) or should it be me? Not really sure on this one! I've already had one of the bridesmaids asking if the dress really has to come from BHS. I thought that was well cheeky, but being me I didn't tell her how I felt I've already shelled out £12 to post her (too small) dress to her and now she's expecting me to pay to return it to me via post so I can return it to BHS.

wow your BM is checky! asking if the dress really has to come from BHS. I think that if she's being that picky then say that your budget is X anything above that she will have to pay for! make sure that she knows the colour and design if she going to buy it. if the dress is fine other than needing slight alturations and she won't pay then I think she's just going to have to wear it if I was a BM I would never question the bride choice I just think that ******** rude!

RainbowDrops

I've had to have one of my BMs dresses altered & I paid for it - wouldn't dream of asking the BM to pay.
The dresses were my choice (with their aggreal of course).

I think it'd be different if your BM told you to to get a certain size that she'd aim to slim down to. Then if it's still the wrong size it's her responsibility.

RE the BM saying "does the dress have to be from BHS" - have you thought about suggesting that they pay if they want something different?
If you're paying, then ultimately the choice is yours, although you want them to be reasonably happy with what they're wearing.

no1gymbunny

As I've ordered it from BHS Online you can't return their wedding stuff to the store, it has to go back to their website. I'll need to send it back from my house as I've got another dress here to go back and I've got the delivery note. I can get their courier to pick it up from here. (PS, I'm in Scotland, she's in Leicester).

no1gymbunny

Rainbowdrops - I want all the dresses to be the same, ie the one that I've already chosen. The other BMs are happy. I've bought the dress and bolero jacket, they're paying for the shoes.