Carer and DLA

chillimog

sunnyone wrote: »

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/3220300=

Yes, I call it "we" because he is my partner, but we are not living together at the moment. I am however, there more often than not because he needs so much help, hence the need to move in.

Essentially, if my partner hadn't been served with S21, I would have properly moved in with him, but we feel it would be better to get that sorted first.

GlasweJen

chillimog wrote: »

I wonder if anybody could offer advice.

My partner has a long term mental illness and is a suicide risk. He needs day to day help and supervision, particularly in monitoring his meds, cooking, personal care etc.

A few years ago, he had an accident in his former flat. He was living in squalor, because he was unable to look after his surroundings due to his health, and lit a candle, which was then knocked over and caused a fire in his flat. He was later convicted of reckless arson as a result, as it was clear that his mental health played a part in this, according to pre sentencing reports.

He has attempted suicide more than once in the past, and I am finding I have to administer his meds, rather strictly, so that he doesn't do himself any harm.

As a result, we have taken the decision that it is necessary for me to care for him full time, because he cannot manage on his own, needs a lot of emotion support and a lot of supervision.

DLA is paid on current care needs, not ones from years ago.

What care needs does he actually have just now?

chillimog

GlasweJen wrote: »

DLA is paid on current care needs, not ones from years ago.
What care needs does he actually have just now?

His care needs are as follows:

He cannot cook for himself - he has a fear of using the cooker because a few years ago, he was involved in a fire. He has more than once, left the oven on, and recently left the tap on and flooded the kitchen.

He cannot be left unsupervised for long periods, because of the risk of suicide - he has attempted suicide more than once.

He cannot deal with his affairs - opening and dealing with mail, paying bills, remember important dates, appointments etc.

He is unable to handle anything which is slightly stressful, or puts him under pressure - he has frequent panic attacks as a result.

He cannot be left in charge of his own medication because of the risk of suicide.

If left to his own devices, he will live in squalor. He's not able to look after his own surroundings.

He has to be prompted to take care of his personal hygiene, on his v bad days (which are quite frequent), he will not shower, dress, clean his teeth etc. While he can do it himself, he does need to be prompted and guided.

He can't handle answering the telephone or answering the door.

He often can't handle going out alone. He often panics with this.

chillimog

GlasweJen wrote: »

DLA is paid on current care needs, not ones from years ago.
What care needs does he actually have just now?

His care needs are as follows:

He cannot cook for himself - he has a fear of using the cooker because a few years ago, he was involved in a fire. He has more than once, left the oven on, and recently left the tap on and flooded the kitchen.

He cannot be left unsupervised for long periods, because of the risk of suicide - he has attempted suicide more than once.

He cannot deal with his affairs - opening and dealing with mail, paying bills, remember important dates, appointments etc.

He is unable to handle anything which is slightly stressful, or puts him under pressure - he has frequent panic attacks as a result.

He cannot be left in charge of his own medication because of the risk of suicide.

If left to his own devices, he will live in squalor. He's not able to look after his own surroundings.

He has to be prompted to take care of his personal hygiene, on his v bad days (which are quite frequent), he will not shower, dress, clean his teeth etc. While he can do it himself, he does need to be prompted and guided.

He can't handle answering the telephone or answering the door.

He often can't handle going out alone. He often panics with this.

chillimog

I should point out, that since he was awarded the lower rate, his mental health has been on a rapid decline, hence the need for appeal.

Oldernotwiser

chillimog wrote: »

Yes, I call it "we" because he is my partner, but we are not living together at the moment. I am however, there more often than not because he needs so much help, hence the need to move in.

Essentially, if my partner hadn't been served with S21, I would have properly moved in with him, but we feel it would be better to get that sorted first.

Are you both claiming benefits as single people?

nannytone_2

rather than you giving up work to look after him.........
from the details of your post, it appears he needs 'professional' help and not just looking after.

chillimog

nannytone wrote: »

rather than you giving up work to look after him.........
from the details of your post, it appears he needs 'professional' help and not just looking after.

Yes he does, and that's another fight, but as I have said in a previous post, he's being given the run around by the professionals, because they claim they cannot offer the intensive therapy he needs. It's an ongoing battle we are having, and his GP is involved. That in itself, isn't helping him.

nannytone_2

if he is a suicide risk and can do virutally nothing for himself, getting him sectioned may give him access to the services he needs.

chillimog

I've have also been down that route, but they don't feel he needs to be sectioned. It's simply not black and white. The problem is, he has Borderline Personality Disorder, which is extremely difficult to get the right treatment for, hence he's being given the run around. He's not "sectionable", as they say, but they give him precious little else. It's almost as though they don't believe how ill he is, but I see it for myself and I see him getting worse.