Which city to live in?!

dilemma10

Hi everybody,

I have a really big decision to make and just cannot decide what to do!

6 weeks ago I broke up with my partner of 5 years who I moved to London for. I moved back to my parents house 100 miles away.
I have a work from home job so luckily my employer does not mind me doing my job 100 miles away.

My parents live on a new build housing estate and I had a look at some properties and put in for a new build flat under the Homebuy Direct scheme. I thought I wanted to settle down in the Midlands, find a new job and have my own place.

However, it's not really as simple as this. My job is in policy and most policy roles are in London. My job at the moment means I commute 2-3 days a week sometimes which is stressful and costing alot up front (I get expenses back though). I also am in a really good position further my career down south and a friend has just offered me a room in a flat where her flat mate is going in Ealing.

The more complicated thing though is that I have more friends on my wavelength down south but no relatives. The rent would be ludicrous £625 a month and my job is VERY stressful.

Do I get my own place here, on a mortgage which is £386 a month, get a new job in the Midlands which is less stressful or spend years as a city slicker, finding my way in life?

ARGH.

PasturesNew

"My job is in policy and most policy roles are in London"

I have absolutely no idea what that even means, so absolutely no idea what the implications of that would be. Why're they mostly in London? What is it?

What sort of job would you do instead?

VfM4meplse

What a dilemma! I was in a similar position about 4 years ago, I moved to Manchester for what I thought was at least 3 years, found it wasn't the opportunity I thought it would be (although I loved the city itself). So I knew a reversal of this change of direction was critical and was prepared to stay in Manchester if I could get my life back on track.

I was back in 14 weeks for economic reasons - the fact is there are decent jobs in the south, and there were no equivalent specialist roles in the north.

VfM4meplse

PasturesNew wrote: »

"My job is in policy and most policy roles are in London"

I have absolutely no idea what that even means

I do! Stay in London unless you have a clear plan to work in a different area!!!

elsien

Do you like your job? It may be stressful at times, but that suits some people. Or would you prefer to be doing something else?
If you like your job and you have more people on your wavelength down south, family are only a couple of hours away by train if you stay in London.
Whereas if you want to get out and into a different line of work, then that may give you more options elsewhere.
What are your priorities - friends, family, easier life, bigger challenge? That's what you need to decide first.

dilemma10

PasturesNew wrote: »

"My job is in policy and most policy roles are in London"

I have absolutely no idea what that even means, so absolutely no idea what the implications of that would be. Why're they mostly in London? What is it?

What sort of job would you do instead?

Well I think this is an exaggeration on my part. I work in a membership organisation which has very close ties to government departments like department for education etc and as we are a small team I get great exposure to ministers and secretaries of state etc. I would like to eventually work in parliament or in one of the departments.

There are some educational quangos/agencies in the midlands but due to recession there aren't any jobs.

I could do a policy role but in another sector, I just don't see many jobs going in the midlands.

Argh!

elsien

dilemma10 wrote: »

I get great exposure to ministers and secretaries of state etc. I would like to eventually work in parliament or in one of the departments.

There are some educational quangos/agencies in the midlands but due to recession there aren't any jobs.

Sounds to me like you've just answered your own question, tbh.

beckseven

I would say take the ealing flat tbh and enjoy living in London whilst you have no ties and further your career. I know I would do the same if I were in your shoes. If you rent then there's no committment really, you need friends on your wavelength when you have just gone through a breakup who you say are in London. Give it a try-if it all gets too much financially and stress wise then you have the option to find a job in the Midlands and move back home. Hope all goes well for you.

peachyprice

I too would stay in London. You'll have so many more opportunities to network if you're actually there.

It won't take long for possible contacts to disregard you if they know you're not available the same day or have to rush of to get home to the Midlands, so much more goes on out of business hours, I'm sure you're aware of that already.

cazziebo

Not sure if what you're looking to do is put down roots, or just find a place to live and work.

I also work in policy and if this is a career you want to pursue then I think you have to be in London. I live in Scotland, and have the option to work from home but actually find most of my week is spent in London. This week I have two meetings at Whitehall, one in the HofC, a think tank meeting and then -eek - addressing a conference on Saturday. In the middle of that I have a presentation at a bank in Edinburgh! However, I have a partner, a dog and a daughter in Scotland. (Adult daughter - just about to move out)

I found a room through mondaytofriday.com (thanks to the lovely people on the housebuying board). This gives me the best of both worlds. I have somewhere to live during the week, I can meet up with people, attend functions etc I pay £400 pcm for a self contained studio - own entrance, en suite etc. It's in Battersea so minutes to the office in Waterloo or to Victoria for a short walk to Westminster. My return ticket home is £117.50 which is probably similar to what a lot of people pay to commute to London weekly. I still have my own life in Scotland. I've been doing this for 6 months, and I'm not sure how sustainable this is but it's fine for now.

Emmzi

how did you get on with the whole "WORKING FROM HOME" issue you had before? That might be half the answer...