What is love and why are you getting married?

becca0417

I was talking to my OH about this today after seeing the clear love between the newlyweds and it turned into quite an interesting discussion!
So what in your opinion is love and is it the same for everyone?
And why are you marrying your OH?!

shellsuit

I married because I love my husband, because we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, because we wanted to be a proper family and most of all because we are now each others next of kin should anything happen to either of us, so it was a legal aspect as well as for love.

I think love is when you love someone (obviously!) and when you can't imagine them not being in your life anymore. It's when all your hopes and dreams contain that person and it's when you can both get through the good AND the bad together.

Love ain't always roses and moonlight

DiamondsnPearls

For more or less the same reasons as Shellsuit posted.
My OH and I went through a very bad patch, split up for about 18 months, grew up, talked for hours and hours on end and fell back in love with eachother, to be honest I don't even think we were properly in love the first time we were together.

To allow myself to make such a commitment is a big thing for me, and OH. We sat down and realised that we want exactly the same things out of life, be great parents to our cchildren, work hard, have nice things and a nice home etc, but most importantly, we just want to be us and be happy.

Until recently I don't think I have ever been in love, I've been infactuated, thought I loved someone but mostly it was either unrequieted(sp?) or just plain mucked up. Now I just have this overwhelming feeling of just peace and comfort when it comes to our relationship, I struggle to put it into words

codemonkey

See both posts above.

My parents have been married for 50 years and are still in love. They never go anywhere without each other, and they still hold hands on the couch while they watch tv so I have a lot to live up to.

Love seems to be made of a lot of little things which add up to something huge. It's all the little pet names and in-jokes that nobody else would get. It's having a bubble fight while doing the washing up and giggling til your tummy aches. It's being so irritated with that person that you could break something over their head, only for him to say or do something that makes you giggle 10 seconds later. It's being lifted off your feet in a massive hug. It's when you've had a horrible day and all you want to do is get home and be with him, and when he hugs you it all disappears. It's getting that warm feeling in your tummy when you look at him and feeling it spread through your body until you want to hug yourself and kick your legs. It's putting that person's needs before your own and knowing you'd do anything to protect him. It's knowing that everything else would disappear and you wouldn't care as long as he was still by your side.

I'm marrying him because he's the only person who can put up with me and because his last name is easier to spell than mine. :rotfl::rotfl:

White_Sapphire

What a lovely thread!

I knew I was in love when all my ideas and hopes for the future automatically included him - in previous relationships it had always been a case of "I really want to do this, but how would the boyfriend fit into the situation?", almost as though the relationship was a barrier or a burden! His dreams are just as important as mine, and I would happily put off what I want to help him achieve them, as he would do (in fact, is doing now) for me.

I can't imagine life without him, and can't wait to cuddle up on the sofa of an evening - although being a bit of an independant sort I love having the flat to myself now and again too!

He also knows exactly how to deal with, and help me through, a medical condition I periodically suffer from, which no-one else has ever done before.

Tearing up a little now

x

emsbet

I got married because I couldn't imagine my life without my DH and wanted to make the ultimate commitment to him.

He is the only man who has ever made me laugh every single day! He tells me that I'm wonderful and beautiful everyday and makes me feel like a princess even when I have greasey hair, no make up and am being a moody cow!

xx

spoonymoose

Love is something that's hard to describe with words, it's a feeling between you and that other person, the smiles that instantly come to your face when you see or think about that person.

It's knowing that whatever happens and however bad something gets, you'll always have that warm, happy feeling because somebody out there is thinking about you, wanting to make you smile, wanting to make you happy and wanting to be with you forever, and you are feeling the same.

Love it when they know you inside and out, and can instantly know that something is wrong and how they can cheer you up without asking.

Love is that safe feeling, even though the other person might not be 6ft9 and built like a safe house, you feel safe and happy regardless. You'd do anything for that person and they would do the same.

He is perfect, even though I may rant about how annoying he can be, how he winds me up something rotten, he only does that because I love him and vice versa and because he knows everything about me.

And I'm marrying the OH because of all of this, because he is my soul mate and because he is lucky enough for me to let go and be the real me, and even when I'm having tantrums about how ugly and fat I look, he just takes me in his arms, places a kiss on my forehead and replies "you are beautiful, you are perfect."

Sugar_Moon

Awww these are so sweet!! I have to say that when I met my OH I just knew there would never be anyone else. When we hugged it was like 2 jigsaw bits fitting together. I remember when we were first dating and he came up behind me in a shop and gently stroked my neck and kissed it- I nearly blew up like a firework cos no one ever made me feel so special.

Marrying him feels right. When I look at his photo on my desk I just feel like throwing everything down and running to his work just to be with him!!

When the vicar asked why I wanted to marry him I couldnt put it into words...and couldnt exactly say all what I have above..so I was like 'erm..well..er' and mustve looked like a proper numpty!!!

Hope I havent made you all throw up

spoonymoose

White_Sapphire wrote: »

What a lovely thread!

I knew I was in love when all my ideas and hopes for the future automatically included him - in previous relationships it had always been a case of "I really want to do this, but how would the boyfriend fit into the situation?", almost as though the relationship was a barrier or a burden! His dreams are just as important as mine, and I would happily put off what I want to help him achieve them, as he would do (in fact, is doing now) for me.

I can't imagine life without him, and can't wait to cuddle up on the sofa of an evening - although being a bit of an independant sort I love having the flat to myself now and again too!

He also knows exactly how to deal with, and help me through, a medical condition I periodically suffer from, which no-one else has ever done before.

Tearing up a little now

x

emsbet wrote: »

I got married because I couldn't imagine my life without my DH and wanted to make the ultimate commitment to him.

He is the only man who has ever made me laugh every single day! He tells me that I'm wonderful and beautiful everyday and makes me feel like a princess even when I have greasey hair, no make up and am being a moody cow!

xx

Sugar_Moon wrote: »

Awww these are so sweet!! I have to say that when I met my OH I just knew there would never be anyone else. When we hugged it was like 2 jigsaw bits fitting together. I remember when we were first dating and he came up behind me in a shop and gently stroked my neck and kissed it- I nearly blew up like a firework cos no one ever made me feel so special.

Marrying him feels right. When I look at his photo on my desk I just feel like throwing everything down and running to his work just to be with him!!

When the vicar asked why I wanted to marry him I couldnt put it into words...and couldnt exactly say all what I have above..so I was like 'erm..well..er' and mustve looked like a proper numpty!!!

Hope I havent made you all throw up

Such beautiful reasons... I need to find some tissues before the OH comes home and sees me sobbing like the soppy sod I am

spoonymoose

codemonkey wrote: »

See both posts above.

My parents have been married for 50 years and are still in love. They never go anywhere without each other, and they still hold hands on the couch while they watch tv so I have a lot to live up to.

Love seems to be made of a lot of little things which add up to something huge. It's all the little pet names and in-jokes that nobody else would get. It's having a bubble fight while doing the washing up and giggling til your tummy aches. It's being so irritated with that person that you could break something over their head, only for him to say or do something that makes you giggle 10 seconds later. It's being lifted off your feet in a massive hug. It's when you've had a horrible day and all you want to do is get home and be with him, and when he hugs you it all disappears. It's getting that warm feeling in your tummy when you look at him and feeling it spread through your body until you want to hug yourself and kick your legs. It's putting that person's needs before your own and knowing you'd do anything to protect him. It's knowing that everything else would disappear and you wouldn't care as long as he was still by your side.

I'm marrying him because he's the only person who can put up with me and because his last name is easier to spell than mine. :rotfl::rotfl:

DiamondsnPearls wrote: »

For more or less the same reasons as Shellsuit posted.
My OH and I went through a very bad patch, split up for about 18 months, grew up, talked for hours and hours on end and fell back in love with eachother, to be honest I don't even think we were properly in love the first time we were together.

To allow myself to make such a commitment is a big thing for me, and OH. We sat down and realised that we want exactly the same things out of life, be great parents to our cchildren, work hard, have nice things and a nice home etc, but most importantly, we just want to be us and be happy.

Until recently I don't think I have ever been in love, I've been infactuated, thought I loved someone but mostly it was either unrequieted(sp?) or just plain mucked up. Now I just have this overwhelming feeling of just peace and comfort when it comes to our relationship, I struggle to put it into words

shellsuit wrote: »

I married because I love my husband, because we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, because we wanted to be a proper family and most of all because we are now each others next of kin should anything happen to either of us, so it was a legal aspect as well as for love.

I think love is when you love someone (obviously!) and when you can't imagine them not being in your life anymore. It's when all your hopes and dreams contain that person and it's when you can both get through the good AND the bad together.

Love ain't always roses and moonlight

Also such beautiful reasons.

(It wouldn't let me multi-quote so many messages in my first reply!)

MrsDrink

Interestingly enough I was asked pretty much the same question by my Granddad when I asked him to walk with me down the aisle. "What made you decide you wanted to get married?". I can't really say what love is, other than I wouldn't be without it.

But I can say why I want to marry MrD. I never used to want to be married, to anyone. But then after about 5 years of being with MrD I went through a hellish year at work, where I should have called the Unions in, and I was a right cow at home. I took it all out on him, and he stood by me and didn't walk. I knew then that he was a keeper, and that I wanted to be his wife. But then over the next 4/5 years (till I persuaded him it was something he wanted too lol) the feeling grew and grew. I not only want to be his wife, I want to share his name, I want to be a proper part of his family, and I want him to be part of my family. But it was just how much he loves me that made me want to marry him... plus every now and then he'll do something stupid (like potentially breaking his collar bone while riding his bike) that makes me realise that I want to be his wife even more!

(Again sorry to bump up such a relatively old thread - I was away for the weekend and couldn't reply then!)