MIL2B is really starting to annoy me now!

walby1993

Lillythepink and legalblonde - my point exactly!

MrsDrink, the SIL2B don't know the other bridesmaids so that wouldn't really be an option. But as Lilythepink says - what would she be doing with them if I hadn't asked them to be bridesmaids? H2B says he thinks MIL2B is being awkward too but doesn't really want to get stuck in the middle of it, which I can understand but I would rather he said something for me. See, the problem with me is that I let lots of things go and the annoyances build up and build up without me saying anything. Then that person (and this applies to anyone not just MIL2B) does something else and I end up exploding with my anger from everything thats happened and I can see this happening with her if I am not careful! We had already planned to go for a meal with her this evening and I am dreading it. I have a controlled, planned and firm response to her request but in order to remain controlled I need to be allowed to bring it up myself but I can see her making some sarky comment about it all and me exploding! Fingers crossed that doesn't happen!

I am not looking forward to them becoming fully fledged in-laws! I get on fabulously with BIL2B and his girlfriend but the rest drive me nuts! Thank god H2B is nothing like the rest of them and is fantastically wonderful :T

Mrs_Huggett

Can you not stop and think for a moment, if not for the 19 year old, but the 12 year old, she must be terribly hurt if her father has put his new partner before her, earlier in a post you stated that there would not be enough room for all the bridesmaids to get ready at the house as well as yourself, and the rest of your family, do you assume that the other four bridesmaids will want to get ready there as well because your intended husbands sisters are, I can't see how you are going to have to feed them, they are not baby's and I'm sure with a little forward planning they will be able to sort themselves out. I have four son's in a three bedroom house, plus myself and my husband, so I do understand that things can be a bit tight lol! Hopefully you can come to an agreement about the time and you will have one less thing to worry about.

gocurlygirl

Stress all round.I feel a little sorry for sil2b as it appears no one wants them around!I agree with mrs huggett 12 year olds in particular are very sensitive and you will have this hanging around for years if not careful!the sil2b are probably feeling fed up about this too,if not already upset.mil2b is not showing much tact,if it was me I would try to compromise by having these girls arrive a little earlier(say 1200)for make up check and yes final preparation.the 19 year old must feel a little insulted,I would have thought she should be perfectly able to care for 12 year old-they could get a taxi to you(money may be a little tight but it is a one off ! mil2b and fil2b could surely pay for it-maybe being asked may focus their mind too!)
Deep breathe ,stay calm this is YOUR big day,try not to let mil2b spoil it(it seems to me she is a anxious sort but not really thinking of you)can your h2b talk to her,she may be more receptive to him.My 19 yr old dd would be insulted at some of the insinuations here she would be more then capable of getting little sis and herself ready,made up ,hair done and to your house at a suitable time(as a teen she won't want to be too early either! )you don't want this thrown at you in years to come(mil2b or worse h2b)so by arranging things to suit you tactfully and with h2b support you hopefully will enjoy the day.we have no weddings coming up but this could be a mil in our family!!!!!!!!!!!how did it go today?
good luck

luxor4t

Why not ask your mother to talk to her?

- I'm speaking as a very new MiL (as of 16th April )

walby1993

Hi all,

Just thought I would update on the situation. Went out for the meal yesterday and MIL2B brought it up twice saying she didn't know what she was going to do as she needs to get her hair done (apparently hairdresser is very unreliable so I don't even know why she still uses her if this is the case) and I just kept responding with ideas so I wasn't giving in but at the same time wasn't getting into an argument. Anyway went to see MIL2B today to get the 12yo to try on her BM dress again and she said "Can I have your parents address so if worst comes to worst I can send them in a cab." I don't know why she didn't think of this earlier! But at least its sorted now - till the next problem lol.:rotfl:
Trouble with the MIL2B is, I get on with her most of the time but at times she can be incredible selfish and unthinking but I suppose the saving grace is that she doesn't do it on purpose because I don't think she even knows she is doing it. But with things like weddings it brings the irritating traits right to the forefront and because the day is so important to me I am getting more irritated than usual.
But I feel a lot better now that its sorted. :T
Thanks to all for your suggestions and viewpoints!

katerinasol

Phew, glad you got it all sorted! Really like the way you dealt with it as well, rather than getting into an argument and getting angry you made it look like you were trying to help her out rather than completely blocking her. I will remember than next time there's some sort of conflict