A cat with separation anxiety... I think

catieeb06

Hiya,

As the title suggests, I think I have a cat with separation anxiety. Every time I leave the room she follows me. Constantly begs for either attention or food by miaowing at me or rubbing up against me.

It's getting quite frustrating cos it's only me she seems to be attached to, she runs away from my OH.

Is there anything I can do?

I love her to bits and don't want her to not think I don't care.. if you get me? lol

cjmumto2

Do you feed her every time she asks? I dont know but she may just be taking you for a sucker. My kitten follows me around too but i am now stricter with her and only feed her at food times. She also does not go to my OH but he never feeds her or strokes her.

Maybe your OH can start feeding her so that she can see you are not the one and only with food.

catieeb06

She gets fed about 7.30am when i'm on my way to work, then again about 6.30pm when I get home. We do have biscuits for her but we're limiting those as she's become a real chunky monkey in the last month.

cjmumto2

If you are at work all day then maybe she just is lonely and making up for lost time, maybe she needs a playmate? I know all cats are different and some like to be loners but maybe yours needs more company? I am not expert though.

KiKi

catieeb06 wrote: »

Hiya,

As the title suggests, I think I have a cat with separation anxiety. Every time I leave the room she follows me. Constantly begs for either attention or food by miaowing at me or rubbing up against me.

It's getting quite frustrating cos it's only me she seems to be attached to, she runs away from my OH.

Is there anything I can do?

I love her to bits and don't want her to not think I don't care.. if you get me? lol

Hiya

My littlest one is like this. It's a pain in the butt, no matter how much I love her! It also caused problems with my other cat who started getting stressy about it and licked her fur off her tummy!

The way I've solved it with my cat is to spend specific time with her, so she knows she's loved. She sits on my lap for half an hour in the morning, then I put her on the sofa, and start work. She can miaow all she likes, but the most I will do is pet her, and put her on her favourite blanket and leave her.

Then at 2pm she can have another hour with me on my lap, then she's back on the sofa. In the evening I deliberately put her on my lap for an hour so she can cuddle up. If she gets off, that's up to her.

When I go out (and when I used to be out for 11 hours days like you) she's *perfectly* happy to sleep alone!

I doubt it's separation anxiety - more that she just loves your company. My cats will go to whatever room I'm in. If I move and they wake up to see me gone, they'll come and find me, then sleep there! They just love my company.

What I haven't done is give into her, as when I did she got more and more demanding. I have found that it's best to give her some dedicated time (and I really mean dedicated, like half an hour of petting, playing and stroking or brushing) rather than half-hearted strokes every now and then which just cause her to want more.

ETA - as another poster suggested, she may be bored and want a playmate.

HTH
KiKi

catieeb06

cjmumto2 wrote: »

If you are at work all day then maybe she just is lonely and making up for lost time, maybe she needs a playmate? I know all cats are different and some like to be loners but maybe yours needs more company? I am not expert though.

I'm at work all day but my other half doesn't work till 4pm so he's around to give her attention.

She had a playmate at mums and to be honest it didn't suit her, she wanted attention too much and got jealous when the other cat got attention.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

When you work it out, let me know.

I am still followed to the bathroom after 13 years.

And if I go to sleep and he feels lonely, one will traipse all over me and claw at my face to get attention (although the clawing usually stops as he gets catapulted down the bed whilst I am still asleep). Two claw at my hand if I ignore them when awake.

They ignore me happily if they are snoring, but if I make a noise/move/pick up the phone, then they start shouting at me.

Although the fuss is better than the silent approach, where madam's presence in the kitchen is announced by her standing on her hind legs and the insertion of 8 pointy things into the buttocks.

[Deleted User]

I have two cats, and they compete for attention when I'm around - one will sit on my lap, so the other will too. Then the first will climb over the second to get closer to me. So the second will do the same. You get the picture! Sometimes they follow me from room to room, but generally they are being nosey and I just feel constantly watched lol.

I agree that dedicating a set time to your cat may help (I love snuggling with mine in the evenings). And I have to say that my cats do keep each company while I'm out - some times the play fights get a little rough but it always ends with them grooming one another, or sitting side-by-side in the conservatory watching the birds .

LittleMissAspie

My cat is a bit like this. She just loves attention and being stroked/scratched/brushed/massaged. Can't say I blame her, people pay good money for that kind of thing. A good brushing session usually satisfies her, for a couple of hours at least

She gets fed about 7.30am when i'm on my way to work, then again about 6.30pm when I get home.

Maybe she sees you as her mum because you're the one that feeds her. Try getting your OH to feed her and see if her behaviour changes.

catieeb06

LittleMissAspie wrote: »

My cat is a bit like this. She just loves attention and being stroked/scratched/brushed/massaged. Can't say I blame her, people pay good money for that kind of thing. A good brushing session usually satisfies her, for a couple of hours at least


Maybe she sees you as her mum because you're the one that feeds her. Try getting your OH to feed her and see if her behaviour changes.

I think she does see me as mum. If she's out in the garden when I pull up she runs in front of the car as if to say "mums home!!!" Nearly caused some accidents.