Where do I stand, boyfriend, his dad and sis buying a house

louise_1981

I have been with my boyfriend for the past six years, I met him at uni and he is in the very enviable position of having no student debt, and quite a bit of money behind him.

Now we have become grown ups and he has bought a house with his dad and sister owning half and oh owning the other. It is three bedroom. and my oh and I are planning to live in it.

My concern is that it needs work (new kitchen,bathroom,completely re-decoration) and with me living there I am expected to help out with the cost, where as his sister and dad will not dispite owning half.

My arguement is that if we split up, with me having paid half of everything, I will have nothing to show for it and they will have a house that has risen in value at my hard work and expence.

OH arguement is that if we were living anywhere else then I would be expected to contribute to rent anyway.

I am also concerned that with OH sis being 21 and still living at home, she will take it upon herself, that in owning 1/4 of the house she then has a right to live there, which is not what I want, and my OH knows it. But he is very much tied to his mothers apron strings even at 28!

I am not in a position to buy them out currently as I am planning to return to my teacher training next year, and therefore I would not be able to pay the mortgage. And if the house rises in value they his family would be expecting market value for their percentage.

Can anyone clarify my position?

Robert_Sterling

louise_1981 wrote:

Can anyone clarify my position?

Precarious.

Alan_M_2

Get it all down in writing who exactly owns what and what they are responsible for.

If they own a proportion of the house then any maintainance and improvement is there responsibility as well as your OH.

Sort this out now before anything hits a fan. You are quite right to be concerned, you've been put in an unreasonable position by circumstances only.

loates123

not secure

olly300

I've had lots of friends', male and female, in similar situations i.e. the other half owns the house and they don't and they are not married. The best solution has been that the person who doesn't own the property is the tenant and they pay rent equivalent to the average monthly rent in the area to the owner for a room in a property. They also have some sort of written agreement.

Nothing in the house such as fridges, freezers, computers is a joint purchase so either one person or the other owns something outright. The non-property owner may help out with maintenance i.e. painting as you can do this in rented accommodation but they do not pay for anything like kitchen units or any costs of outside workmen.

If you don't do something like this if you split up you will end up having to go to court to get your money back and the onus will be on you to prove that you paid for some maintenance and you will have to written documentation as it will be your word against 3 other people.

david29dpo

have you talked this over with everyone? if not do it now and see what they all say then get back to us!

barnaby-bear

louise_1981 wrote:

OH arguement is that if we were living anywhere else then I would be expected to contribute to rent anyway.


Can anyone clarify my position?

Sounds a LOT easier just to agree to pay a fair rent for the time being - so you'll know exactly what you're spending. Split cost of things like furniture etc if you want - they can be taken away a fitted kitchen can't.

lynzpower

I agree

Let me tell you about what Ive done.

I have a flat. When I met my OH, he moved in. It remained my flat. Ive paid for everything, furniture, decorating, the works. I wouldnt expect him to lay out for those things as legally he has no recourse to getting them back.

His legal status here is almost lodger, despite us being financially tied in other ways. Personally i think you would have more rights as a tenant thabn the situation you find yourself in. Why not ask for a tenancy agreement?

Im selling my flat, we are going to rent together, things should be more equal.

Acc72

I agree with the other comments that you should reasonably contribute to decorating costs and the like, but not to "capital" costs (eg. structural work or new kitchens etc).

You need to first understand the exit strategy of all parties.

Surely it is not the intention of the father and sister to own 1/4 of the house each, and for you and your boyfriend to live there happily ever after.

What happens if you become pregnant (what is the legal position - can you be "evicted") ?

What happens if the sister decides one day to move in ??

If you want to live with your boyfriend a good compromise may be for you to let out your flat (assuming the rent will cover the mortgage) and this will be your property.

You can then move into the other house, pay a reasonable (to other local properties that are shared) rent, and do not contribute to anything more.

Sorry to be doom and gloom, but if you are not extremely careful and lucky, there will be problems ahead.

Your boyfreind, his father and sister will effectively become your landlords - but they will not have this mindset.

eg. do you think the sister will want to pay towards a kitchen that you will use and not her ? (even though if she had a buy to let property with another tenant she would have to do so anyway).

louise_1981

Ill clarify.

We have lived in a rented flat for the past year together, after sharing various houses as students, far away from his family. he now has a new job 10 minutes away from his family. Since August we have lived with his grandmother, whilst looking for a house.

His sister is in the mind set that I have no money in the house and therefore no say in what goes on. His father is much more laid back is doing it to help us out, and we can make the decisions, which is very confusing for myself.

I personally have not got a penny e.g. money in houses, or savings. I have an ok paid full time, permenant job (c£11,000), but as i said in my first post I am expecting to go back to teacher training in September and therefore will have no income to cover any mortgage that I could take out now.

At the minute, I am planning to buy out his sister when I have a full time teaching job in about 18 months time (although I do not know if my OH has passed this information onto his sister and their father.) And this will be by getting a mortgage.

I say his sister as I feel she is more of a threat (e.g. moving in to the house) and his father does not have a problem with us making the decisions.

Hope this makes it a bit more clearer

Louise

lynzpower

Still sounds pretty tenuous.

This sister sounds like she wants a slice of the action. Is she truly amenable to allowing you to buy her out?

If she is, Id try to get something laid down legally - ie, if you have a new kitchen put in now, YOU dont pay for it she does. Hopefully, as a 21 year old girl she wont want to shell out her party money for a new boiler etc. However, the flip of this is that shes paid into the house so wants a slice of the action- and will tack this onto the price she asks for her share.

It all sounds very messy- too many irons in the proverbial fire for my liking ( and yours too, you are right to be worried by this)