Dog PTS - is it always worse the 1st time?

virgin_moneysaver

Hi - had my beloved dog PTS last August - it really cut me up, still get occassionaly upset & was inconsolable for about 2 weeks - think I'm ready to have another dog, but not the same breed as I would feel she was being replaced, but my OH is wary of us having another as he says he couldn't watch me go thru the pain again - my question is 'as it was my 1st experience of being there when Nell was PTS, not realising the speed & suddeness of her response to the anaesthetic, & the leaving her behind - would this be any less painful the next time as I would know what to expect?' - or is it worse because you know exactly whats coming?

thanx

elsien

I've not actually seen any of mine PTS for various reason so I can't comment on that aspect of it.
All I will say is that in my experience when they die whatever/however the reason it doesn't get any easier. The grieving is still the same whether it's dog 1 or dog 4. But in return you get 10+ years if you're lucky of companionship and love. Worth the trade off as far as I'm concerned.

Mrs_P_Pincher

After 30 years of letting my various beloved animals go when the time came, you do get used to the process, but it doesn't hurt any less. However, as elsien says, it's worth the pain at the end for the years before, and as a caring owner, when their time comes, it is the last thing you do for them.

Mrs P P

rising_from_the_ashes

First of all, I'm really sorry to hear about your dog, it's the worst thing about pet ownership, however, at least we are able to give them a dignified ending and stop them suffering.

It is quick, but that's good - there's no suffering.

Does it get better, honestly no.

I must admit all of ours (dogs and cats) have been laid to rest in the garden (though appreciate this isn't possible for everyone) and I do find this comforting. They have also all been pts at home to save them the stress of going to the vet and I certainly wouldn't be in a fit state to drive afterwards.

Will you ever get over it, yes to some extent.

I lost my last cat 4 years ago today and I still have a good bubble over him every now and then and still miss him like crazy.

However, most of the time, I smile at the things he got up to without getting upset.

IMHO the pleasure, joy and happiness they bring is worth it - I have 2 cats just now and an elderly dog (that I've had for 5 years). I dread the day I lose him and get upset at the thought BUT he makes me laugh every day, is loyal, affectionate and still VERY naughty and I wouldn't be without him for a second.

Good luck

Mayflower10cat

I'm so very sorry about your poor dog; we've been almost incapacitated with grief each time we've lost one of our cats.

In truthful answer to your question; I wouldn't say it gets emotionally easier (your heart is still broken) but because you know what's going to happen and how it's not so scary nor such an unknown quantity. Having to PTS a beloved pet you've shared your heart and home with will always be painful. Losing a pet at a very young age is especially tragic. Letting a pet go when they are elderly, ill and suffering and have very little quality of life is different again.

As an illustration, I've been to too many funerals in the last few years. Most were elderly, much loved relatives who died either in their sleep or gradually passed in a hospice. I was sad and upset that I'd not see them here again, yet there was a sense of relief that any suffering was now ended. As a complete contrast, I lost a dear friend at a too young age to alcohol & drugs and that was devastating. And friends of ours lost a baby to cot death which was the saddest funeral ever.

When we take an animal into our home, we need to accept all that that will entail. Some people will say - I'll never have another cat/dog/hamster/ferret again as it was too painful when they died. (I know quite a few friends who feel like this and some family members also. ) On the other side of the coin, I feel that the joy of having a pet share their life with you is the important part. We all die and leave this Earth and we have to do the best we can whilst we are here. There are so many animals that need a good home, it seems only right that we put our prsonal fears aside and simply live for the day, if you like.

That's my personal lecture over, please forgive me!

There_Goes_Trouble

I think the actual process is easier because you know what to expect, that shock you felt with the speed of it won't happen again. The emotional side will always be hard though.

Is it worth it? Absolutely. As hard as it is without my beloved Pippa (and I can't even bear to think about seeing or touching a Samoyed even now, and it's been over a year since she died) I would have another dog in a heart beat and can't bear the thought of not having another dog. It won't be the same breed as her though, although I'd happily have another collie when my current collie dog has gone. Go figure?? I guess it's just different for each one.

MCLF

Hi - am so sorry about your dog. It's terribly sad to go through this.
I've had 4 dogs PTS and currently have a very old dog who gave us a scare last week - but has rallied round.

We know she can't have much longer left and it will be very upsetting when her time does come. But we cope with it by thinking that putting her to sleep will prevent any suffering and distress for her.

As has been said, each one has been equally upsetting. Our last was PTS at home and we have the consolation of knowing she was relaxed in her own environment and just slipped away.

We've always had more than one dog (until now) and don't feel that any were replaced. When appropriate, we got another dog to add to the group.

Despite the heartache I hope to have another puppy at some stage in the future. The years of fun are worth it.

January20

I had my 2 cats pts 4-5 years apart. The first time I didn't know what to expect. I did the second time. It made no difference to my grief. I still feel, nearly 4 months on, that I have lost my best friend and I still say (and believe) I will not have another cat, or indeed another pet as the pain is just too much. Won't put myself through that again.

ETA: So sorry for your loss.

LibbyR26

In my experience, unfortunately it doesn't get any easier. Although I've been through it many times now, it always shocks me how much it hurts.

Although, one thing that I found did give me comfort was the vet coming to the house so that our dogs and cats passed away in familiar surroundings and we'd a chance to say our goodbyes afterwards in our time.

As other posters say, the inconsolable pain we feel when they leave us is the price we pay for the many years of pleasure that sharing our lives with pets give us. Once you are ready the time will be right for another dog to come into your life.

Best wishes and kind thoughts to you

lostinrates

I'm afraid I'm with the majority. Whilst you know whats happening and ''understand it'' after the first times, the dread as an animal gets older mounts, and you grieve tham all as indivisuals, miss them all as much. One of our dogs is a short lived giant breed...which I have inherited, it was the breed my family always had. I love her, and the breed, but I will not be getting another. She's four and a half and I'm already bracing myself (she has a medical problem anyway, and if she reaches 6 it will be considered she did ok, 8 would be considered ''good'') its just too short a time.

virgin_moneysaver

thanx for all the replies - I'm probably just being a coward, I know some experiences in life hurt like hell, & there are far worse things than losing a much loved dog, I just wasn't prepared for how affected I was by the experience, maybe I'm lucky that I've lost very few people, just 1 really close Aunt who was in so much pain at the end it was sad but such a relief for her when she passed
I will make the decision to go to the Dogs Home 2morrow & Im sure it will become apparant if I'm ready or not to take that step again