How soon before the wedding should we get a loan?

hayleythedaisy

I got married last summer, would've taken a loan out at the time but would be mortified if I were still paying off the day now! I would put off getting a loan until you know you really need one personally and spend a bit of time trying to save up. If you can't find £300 a month to save in the mean time, you probably shouldn't be getting a loan for that amount.

jacksma

Idiophreak wrote: »

...but then you go on to describe how you've been working so hard (which I guess it the equivalent of "stressing about") saving...what's the difference?

You've had to go through 5 months of living on the bare minimum, which I'd view as "not a nice" thing to do - if you'd spread the cost over 10 months, instead of 5, you could have had an extra £250/month to spend in the lead up to your wedding - some nicer food, the odd takeout here and there, the occasional movie - would make a stressful time a lot more tolerable.

To me, 10 months of "living moderately" is far more pleasant than 5 months of bootcamp saving. To be honest, if I made myself completely miserable whilst saving for my wedding, I'd probably end up resenting the thing and regret spending so much on it, as you suggest.

That's fair enough - but we haven't felt that we've missed out on anything. We have a 2yr old son who we spend a lot of time with, we get a takeaway once a month, we always have good homecooked meals have Sky TV for movies, and we spend time together every weekend doing stuff as a family or visiting friends. We would work hard regardless, and after the wedding will be saving for a deposit on a house - so it is no different. And everyone's bare minimum is different. We still have a car, we still go on trips out with our son, we still eat nice food. But we now don't drink, don't smoke, don't go out for meals, get takeaways every weekend, get lots of new clothes, etc...

Everyone is different - it's not right or wrong and we are very happy and don't and won't regret it - it was important for us to get married on the date we are, as it represents a year to the day of my partner walking out of hospital after a 5 mth coma and months in intensive care, ending perhaps the worst time of our lives - hence the 'bootcamp saving' - as to us, we wanted to celebrate with all our families and friends just how happy and great life is these days.

Whatever is right for you, you do - and yes, you're right, 10 months of saving would have been far easier than 5. But we feel quite proud of ourselves that we've managed it :T. I've not found it stressful, I've loved it - but then, I used to work in events management, so I've really enjoyed being able to plan an event again, as when my partner fell ill I had to stop work to care for our son who was only a small baby at the time.

catkins

I certainly would not recommend getting a loan for a wedding but then again I can't believe you want to spend £10,000!!!

I thought a wedding was meant to be about a marriage of two people who love each other not to show off the big dress, flashy cars etc. A wedding can be very cheap and you will still be married.

I know lots of couples who spent a fortune on their wedding and they almost all regret it - mind you most of them are now divorced.

I got married after knowing OH for 4 months - hardly spent anything but everyone had a great time (we paid for almost everything including all drinks) and over 30 years later are still very happy

Scotsbride

trying_2_b_good wrote: »

Most suppliers will only want a small deposit now. I'm getting married in August. We had to pay 50% of the venue six months before the venue. When you find your venue, they will tell you how they want to be paid. The dress, photographer, DJ etc have also been deposits - varying from 10% to 50%.

I would strongly urge you not to get a loan now. As said above, be strict with yourself & instead of paying loan installments now, put money into a savings account every month. Set it up in a standing order so there's no excuse. Otherwise, it will be too tempting to use the loan money to pay off the loan itself - rather than really paying it off with your own money (as you won't have used the loan yet)

Perhaps apply for a 0% interest credit card. A £3k limit should be plenty for now. Do a very detailed budget. I

Oh & don't forget to factor the cost of the honeymoon into your budget - a mistake I made.

Have you had a look to see what others have done wedding wise on a small budget. I really don't think getting into debt is the way to go try saving up what you can first. It will save you a hell of a lot of stress using money you've saved.

Idiophreak

catkins wrote: »

I thought a wedding was meant to be about a marriage of two people who love each other not to show off the big dress, flashy cars etc.

I have a slightly different view...a *marriage* is about two people loving each other etc.

A *wedding* is just a celebration of that love. Obviously, how people celebrate varies...Some will just want to stand in front of their friends and family and declare their love for each other - others will want a gigantic hollywood wedding with all the bells and whistles - but you have to start from the acceptance that a "wedding" of any kind is, fundamentally a luxury, a celebration...