How soon before the wedding should we get a loan?

london00

Thanks for all your reply, they've been hugely helpful.

We're seriously rethinking our plan to get a loan after reading all your thoughts. It does seem insane to take on three years of debt as we'll ideally have a kid (or one on the way) by then.

I think we definitely rushed into this and LEJC was right - we were spending more money we didn't have just because we thought we'd borrow it at some point.

So... now how to figure out how we can convince our families to be extra generous and how we can bring costs down...

thriftytwosome

Good luck with your wedding plans london00, you might find when you speak to your family there may be friends or relatives that can help with some of the arrangements to make your day less costly, eg cake, flowers, catering etc. Most families and friends are more than willing to help.

laurarobby

if you took out a 10k loan now over 3 yrs you would be paying something like £400-500 a month back... you might aswel just save that everymonth. with most things you only pay a small deposit on booking then pay about 6weeks before the actuall date. see what u can do with that. we cant aford to save anything really and will be paying deposits on the Credit card and paying it off monthly. OH got a £20k loan when he was 18 so he is still paying that off. only 9months to go! and its paid off. so we might be able to save for a couple of months before the wedding.

fawny

Hiya,

You might find that when you tell your families they will offer to help. We decided where we wanted to get married & then worked out what we could afford & we were expecting to pay for it all ourselves, however when we told my parents my dad took H2B to one side & said he would give us 90% of the cost:D which means we can splash out a bit more now, as we have our money saved anyway.

Good luck I'm sure you can do it, you just need to decide what you want & get an idea of costs.

trying_2_b_good

london00 wrote: »

Thanks for all your reply, they've been hugely helpful.

We're seriously rethinking our plan to get a loan after reading all your thoughts. It does seem insane to take on three years of debt as we'll ideally have a kid (or one on the way) by then.

I think we definitely rushed into this and LEJC was right - we were spending more money we didn't have just because we thought we'd borrow it at some point.

So... now how to figure out how we can convince our families to be extra generous and how we can bring costs down...

:T :beer:

I'm really glad that you've decided against taking out the loan! People on here are so helpful, you'll be amazed at what offers and advice are posted!

I found that I didn't have to ask for money - I was offered/given it (not enough to pay for it all, but parents, aunties, grandparents etc - now totalling around £2.5k). But if you start a conversation about how expensive weddings are, how you've been planning a budget etc, your parents may offer before you ask.

Good luck!

Idiophreak

trinity_enigma wrote: »

My advice- don't having a wedding you can't afford.

...but taking a loan for something doesn't mean you can't afford it, as such.

We took a loan out for our wedding this year - it was either do that and pay back for a year afterwards, or save the money in advance and get married a year later. Really don't see the big deal either way.

For us, we wanted to get married ASAP, as we've already not been married much too long - and we have some elderly relatives that may not last much longer - and we'd really like to have at our wedding.

I don't really see "starting marriage life in debt" as being a big deal, either - we've already got a mortgage, utilities, council tax, maintenance fees, gym memberships, finance plans etc to pay each month - so the loan is just another bill we'll pay together for a while. Hardly the end of the world.

trying_2_b_good

Idiophreak wrote: »

...but taking a loan for something doesn't mean you can't afford it, as such.

We took a loan out for our wedding this year - it was either do that and pay back for a year afterwards, or save the money in advance and get married a year later. Really don't see the big deal either way.

For us, we wanted to get married ASAP, as we've already not been married much too long - and we have some elderly relatives that may not last much longer - and we'd really like to have at our wedding.

I don't really see "starting marriage life in debt" as being a big deal, either - we've already got a mortgage, utilities, council tax, maintenance fees, gym memberships, finance plans etc to pay each month - so the loan is just another bill we'll pay together for a while. Hardly the end of the world.

Hi Idiophreak - I agree to an extent. However this is mainly because the loan is only for a year. The OP wanted a 3 year loan - which means they'll pay even more back in the end and won't have and money to spoil themselves for even longer! Also, every individual has different circumstances - perhaps the OP doesn't have a house yet (so a mortgage would be harder to get when paying off a substantial loan), perhaps you're not planning on having kids for a while (or ever). That's why in my first response, I didn't say absolutely don't get a loan - but rather pointed out things to think about. You have a good point - and that's why this forum is so good - to get lots of opinions! But as the nature of the website is money saving & getting out of debt, there are going to be a lot of people who are against getting into debt in the first place!!

Idiophreak

trying_2_b_good wrote: »

Hi Idiophreak - I agree to an extent. However this is mainly because the loan is only for a year. The OP wanted a 3 year loan - which means they'll pay even more back in the end and won't have and money to spoil themselves for even longer! Also, every individual has different circumstances - perhaps the OP doesn't have a house yet (so a mortgage would be harder to get when paying off a substantial loan), perhaps you're not planning on having kids for a while (or ever). That's why in my first response, I didn't say absolutely don't get a loan - but rather pointed out things to think about. You have a good point - and that's why this forum is so good - to get lots of opinions! But as the nature of the website is money saving & getting out of debt, there are going to be a lot of people who are against getting into debt in the first place!!

Obviously, everything's down to personal circumstances etc - which is exactly my point. A lot of people on here seem to dismiss the idea of borrowing money without thought. Even a 3 year loan need not mean OP "suffering" in any way. The only difference the length of the loan really makes is in the interest repaid. So if you assume the OP was going to save for 3 years instead of taking the loan, they're still going to be unable to spoil themselves for, say, 2 years and 10 months - hardly a huge difference in quality of life.

Also, depending on circumstances, there can be financial benefits to being married earlier. The amount of extra benefits my fianc!e will be entitled to through my company once she's my wife far outweigh a little interest on a loan.

This site isn't, as such, about helping people get out of debt - it's about helping people make sound financial decisions and save money. My objection is with people who jump on any post about loans and say "just save up" - maybe I'm of this "want it all, now" generation that's so often spoken about...But if you can *afford* a debt (including reasonable allowances for unemployment, sickness etc), I really don't see the big deal. Life's too short.

LEJC

I understand your sentiment of lifes to short and have read with interest your comments...and in actual fact I quite agree that in the right circumstances a loan is indeed a great thing I also happen to agree that the words you quoted originally from trinity regarding not having a wedding you cant afford is indeed a very good and sound piece of advice!.... I am sure that all the thousands of people who get into debt also thought that they could "afford" each loan they took out too...sadly it only takes the loss of a job or change in financial circumstances to alter what you might think to be "hardly a huge difference in quality of life" to "suffering" or to use the phrase I uses in my original post.."challenging"....

I'm not quick to judge and thankfully I can manage the debt I have but I am mindful that situations can change quickly and for some people debt does feel like the end of the world. It sounds from your comments that you too have not been in the position of struggling with debt so we must both think ourselves lucky in that respect but maybe some of the other posters here have not been as fortunate as you and I and are passing on words of wisdom rather than jumping on a post to encourage saving....to that effect I would still urge anyone thinking of borrowing a large amount of money to fund a wedding over an extended period to explore the other possiblities and think hard before committing to such.

twirlypinky

It's one of those things that really is different for every couple. Although i still wouldn't have taken out a loan, h2b and i would probably have spent more on our wedding if we already had a good sized house and a mortgage sorted etc. As it is right now we're living in h2b's one bed shoe box, and want to move asap. Spending money on the wedding has to take a back seat for that really.