bereaved papillion?

GlasweJen

Following on from my last thread on this board we have suddenly found ourselves dealing with a bereaved dog.

The dog is 12 and has never been separated from her mum for more than a few days previous to this. Her mum was PTS on Tuesday and pup hasn't been right since.

We are trying to keep her routine as normal as possible but she is getting very anxious when out walking and is backing away from traffic and noise which isn't good as we live near a school.

Also she is doing a lot of the papillion shake thing and is not drinking enough which is causing her to pant a lot at the moment.

We'd rather avoid the vet at the moment if possible as we don't want to stress her any more. Her appetite is fine in terms of eating and although she's out of sorts in herself she doesn't seem sick.

Does anyone have any tips on bereaved dogs?

antw23uk

Hello
Sorry to hear about the loss of one of your dogs. My advise would be to stop thinking of her as grieving and take your role as leader. If your walking on egg shells and giving her cuddles when she is acting alittle 'sad' then you are feeding the behaviour you do not wish for.

Increase her walks and take a toy/ some treats and when she is acting happy and well you should praise her with a quick game or a treat. Ignore the behaviour you do not wish to encourage (Ignore bad behaviour and praise good)

As her appetite is good you can add a little water to her meat food to increase her water intake.

All too often we humans put emotions onto our animals when all they need is an upbeat positive leader (thats you) to keep them motivated and going in the right direction that we want them to go.

Good luck

WolfSong2000

Did she get to see her mum after she died? As with humans, I think it's easier for them to accept and acknowledge the loss if they can see it first hand. Our "pup" (now 13) lost his dad earlier this year, but it didn't seem to register with him until he saw us burying him. Even after that, for a good few weeks, he'd look up every time he heard a sound,, half hoping/expecting his dad to come back. It was heartbreaking to watch.

I suspect your girl is grieving - and, as you said, she's never been away from her mum, so I suspect everything's a bit much at the moment. I'd try keeping to the routine, but if she's freaking out at traffic, etc, try altering the walks to quieter times of day, then slowly building it back up, so she has time to adjust.

Unlike antw23uk, I'd suggest some added cuddles and attention could be just what the doctor ordered. I believe that dogs *do* grieve, and just as you wouldn't expect a grieving human to get back to normal straight away, the same shouldn't be expected of a dog. Give her some extra attention, maybe some nice food treats (e.g. chicken) mixed in with her regular food just to tempt her a bit if she's not eating. Keep an eye on her water intake to make sure she's not becoming dehydrated, but unless it worsens I see no reason to take her to the vet.

GlasweJen

She's certainly acting like she's grieving, she's not very upbeat about anything. Where usually the word "walkies" would have her in a frenzy she doesn't even get the tail up until the lead is actually on her. We've realised that she's happy to walk in the village as long as there are no other dogs which is hard as the village is full of them (but not much traffic).

She never got to see her mum after she was PTS, they kept her at the vet to be taken away by the doggy undertaker (she's being cremated).

YorkiePud_3

I am so so sorry about your sad loss ... but I would advise you to tread carefully with your little one.
First of all, I'd go to the vets and explain she isn't drinking as much as she should be and ask if you can buy some little syringes (not the ones with needles on!) ... my chihuahua doesn't drink very much at all and they can end up having real shaking fits and getting dehydrated.

A lot of people say oh, they'll drink when they're thirsty which is sheer rubbish because even on a hot summer day, my daft dog will pant and almost collapse on his side but won't drink himself so I syringe some water into his mouth and the vet has told me this is the best thing to do and that these smaller dogs sometimes do need you to do that. They get upset over the slightest things and if they set their mind to it, they won't eat OR drink, so you really need to get some syringes and get some water down your little girl for her own good.
I don't mean by forcing it down ... my dog takes a decent drink on a morning then twice through the day I give him 4 syringe fulls .... the syringes I have are the very smallest ones only 1ml ones, very thin and easy to put at the back of their mouths without causing them distress or discomfort.

Have you got an old blanket or coat that was her Mum's?
Maybe a piece of your clothing that you had on last time you cuddled her Mum?
Basically, anything that still has her Mum's smell on it ... if you do then I would say let the little one sleep on it .. just give it to her, let her do what she wants, whether she just carries it around with her or chooses to sleep on it, but the familiar scent will relax and reassure her.

Over a period of time, you can take it away from her and perhaps get so that she is happy enough through the day without it but maybe just likes to sleep with it on a night ... but just at this moment, this poor little lamb is feeling every bit as bereft as you are but the problem is that with not seeing her Mum and realising she had "gone", she is still pining, waiting for her to suddenly appear. She doesn't know if she's gone out for a walk ... or to the vets ... but she is still expecting her to be around ... every day will be the same ... so she needs that reassurance and that's a good way of her getting it till she realises in her own mind that Mum's not coming back.

I've always let my dogs see the others who have been put to sleep (if at all possible, I have our wonderful vet come to the house), then, afterwards, I let the others come into the room ... it sounds a bit icky but believe me it isn't ... they usually go up to the one who has gone and when they realise they're just lied there and not moving, they walk away as though they are not bothered at all ... it's so strange .. they really do get the idea that they are gone and they don't pine for them afterwards.

I don't think the vet would advise anything for you to do really ... as with us, it takes time for them to come to terms with another dog no longer being around so it's best to ease and reassure them as much as you can .. and if that means lots of extra cuddles, then so be it (I totally agree with WolfSong, and having had many of these little dogs I know this is what they react best to) ... this is what she needs right now ... comfort, love and reassurance ... she will find her own way through it so I would say just carry on as before ... but please do consider getting some syringes ... a dog can go without food for a little while, but not water ... and these tinkers really do suffer if they get dehydrated so, for her own good, I'd give the vet a ring and explain and see if they will let you buy some.
I'm sure they will ... I usually go in to buy some and they give me a handful for free ... !

I know it's hard for you all .... there is nothing worse than losing a much loved pet ... so you have to help each other through .. you and your other little dog, I mean ... don't worry about her being depressed or down, she will come through it eventually but it just takes time.

Kinski

I'm so sorry you wee one is going through this, I'm not sure if it would help but have you thought about getting a dap diffuser it might just help her feel a wee bit better. I've not been in your situation but my sister has always let her remaining dogs see and sniff the dog that's just died, it's always seemed to help them get over the loss of a companion and in one case a son get over the loss of his mum.