Mediation

shortbread

I have another thread on the Go regarding separation and my partners ex trying to force sale of joint owned house............thats another story, along with this demand she has had her solicitor request that they attend mediation after 2 years of separation ?????

My question if anyone can help is , Is it actually worth going, seeing as she Is adamant that the HOUSE be sold because she is starting court proceedings to enforce sale.

Also my partner is currently unemployed but may be starting work soon, so whilst first session is free...I'm guessing when back in a job it will cost him a few bob along with the already escalating solicitors fees???

Can anyone offer any genuine advice on the outcome of attending this session other than looking like hes playing ball.

Much appreciated.

shortbread

No one .........no examples of what to expect or if its worth it????

pigpen

Ours was about £100 an hour..

He threw a wobbly twice and stomped out.. I laughed at him.. we agreed stuff and he went back on his word..

For me.. it wasn't worth it.. we had contact with the children to sort and the mortgage and bank loan.

Independant of the mediation and through the solicitors we decided on a clean break settlement (which I need to ring and chase about 3 months later.. they said 2-3 weeks.. *shrug*) and the mediation could have been more use had he stuck to what we discussed and didn't turn it into a point scoring exercise.

You get out what you put in and nothing you agree there is enforcable so it depends what you want out of it.

shortbread

Well all Im questioning is the how worthwhile it is.............simply because She is already starting court proceedings apparently.............so what is there to mediate?

I'm just wondering if its just to make my partner look like he's been that unreasonable she's had to get mediation.........???

I could see the point if they'd just split up and weren't sure of what they wanted..............but he wants to stay in house and she wants it sold....no compromise for her.

pigpen

It seems to be routinely offered/suggested so they can save court costs by sorting things out without having to go to court.

At mediation they could discuss their reasons for wanting to sell/not wanting to sell and see if an amicable agreement could be reached without having to go to court..

for example.. if he could say we will sell the house in X years time and she can put forward her reasoning for why she feels he is being unreasonable... is he willing to compromise?

Court proceedings could be for the divorce which can be concluded without the mediation being finished.

shortbread

Well.......he asked to sign house to his name back in 2009 when she left...........she agreed............on condition that he took over their joint 10k loan....so he spent a fortune on solicitors getting contract drawn up...........she then dilly dallied until mid 2010 when his earnings dropped, signed contract knowing this would not happen....then dilly dallied again and suddenly pops up with taking him to court to force sale....

He doesn't want to as he's been paying mortgage and loan on his own for last two years....and likes the house. Its been a hard battle and doesn't want to give up.

They were never married.

pigpen

Marriage doesn't much come into it if she can prove she put money into the house.

I'd possiby not bother with the mediation and go to the court hearing and say my piece.. or have the solicitor go with a list of reasons why she should not be able to force a sale. If he has been paying the mortgage and the bank loan for more than 6 month without any money from her it is highly unlikely they will find in her favour according to my solicitor.

What the court can do is sign the house over to him with the mortgage remaining in both names but she would have no legal claim or right to the property.. this needs consent from the mortgage company and not necessarily from her. This is what we just did with my house.. the house is legally mine to do with as I see fit but the mortgage and bank loan are in joint names, however, should I default on either he is jointly liable for the debt.

shortbread

If house was sold all shed get after the loan was paid off is about 1k........and it would leave my partner, myself and my son homeless. Surely no judge would grant that. Hopefully my partners income will be back on track next month, so mortgage will again be affordable in his name.

shortbread

My OH went to mediation yesterday and asked the question if my ex is applying to courts for sale of house,whats point in medation? the answer " A court wont entertain a case until mediation has been tried...its a new law as of 6th April "

It angers me that she is wasting public funds to assist her with this when she has already wasted 2 years worth already.............so basically by agreeing to mediation, he is assisting in her taking him to court................would anyone agree with this??? The last letter from her solicitor said he has been instructed to start an application for force sale of house and my OH received an email the other week to say she would be getting house valued......so looks to me like she is only doing the mediation as a means to an end and surely that shouldnt be allowed if she is not looking for resolution but merely a way to get to court??

Flee_2

New rules have come into place about divorce. As from 6th April anyone going through a divorce and has not put through the ancillary relief (sorting out money between couples) to a court has to go through mediation if they have not had mediation in the past 4 months before the end of the divorce.
I have been tricked into this by the court dealing with my divorce. They received it a week before 6th April but denied receiving it until after then. So now I have attend a mediation session by law.

shortbread

Flee that is so not good.......Im all for mediation, but only if it is genuinely requested and needed, especially as it costs about 120 a session........