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dukess86

Hello, I am new to the site for posts, although have read the advice many times.

3 Years ago I had to leave a well paid job because of ill health. Don't think I will be able to work again. My husband lives with me and our two teenage girls. We have always worked and never worried about our debts as we could pay them. However, things have peeked. I feel responsible cos he still earns and I get a pension plus some benefits which are not great.

I am hoping for some moral support to deal with this as it is now getting to me.

Tixy

Hi and welcome on board.

Have you done a financial assessment to see whether you can afford to live and service your debts based on husband's income and your income? If you haven't yet done this then this is usually a great place to start. Seeing all your monthly costs in black and white can help get a handle on the full situation, plus it may help identify if there are areas you could spend less but get the same (things like checking gas. elec, insurances, phones etc are all with the cheapest providers).

If you left work because of ill health then I don't think you need to feel repsonsible for the situation the family is in. Presumably it could just have easily been the other way round, husband with ill health and you still working. Is it just you that feels guilty/responsible? presumably OH doesn't see it like that.

Have you checked you are getting all the benefits you can for the family as a whole?

Anyway the first thing I would do is complete this statement of affairs for your household - http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html. If you also decide to post it on here you should get feedback and suggestions on your circumstances.

Might also be worth taking a read of this - The Big Guide to Becoming Debt Free

Welcome on board and I hope we can find some areas to make things easier for you. And all over the MSE forum you'll find loads of money saving tips and ideas.

SmilingEyes

Hello dukess and welcome!

Doing the SoA will help see the situation clearly. Working out all the figures can seem boring, but it's really worth it to see where your money is going.

I'm quite new too and as you can see from my signature, I have a long way to go. Our situation is due to change of employement for both of us and a severe drop in earnings.

You're a lovely person and doing the right thing.

Looking forward to your posts.

dukess86

Thanks to you both. I have reviewed everything that goes in and out of our account. I know I am getting all that I am entitled to and OH is working as much overtime as he can (bless). I also now know what is going out so will do a signature and see what comes from that. I am looking at the SOA and will post it here tomorrow.

Thanks for responding, it was just what I needed.

And No OH does not think I have done this all myself, he is really supportive, thank goodness. So onwards and upwards.

dukess86

Here is my signature

YORKSHIRELASS

Hi, and welcome along. Like you I have been forced to leave a well paid job, but for me it was because I had to become a full time carer for my son who has health problems. This has had a big impact on our finances.

I dont know how poorly you are and how your health problems affect you but I decided to use the time at home as productively as possible. I have started growing some of my own veg, bake and cook everything from scratch, have even made some home furnishings. I also spend time researching deals to cut our outgoings and keep track of every tiny detail of our finances. All this makes me feel a bit better about not working.

I just wonder if any of this is possible for you? It might not make a huge difference but it just makes you feel like you are contributing something, even if you are not bringing in a wage any more.

Good luck, hope things improve for you x

dukess86

Thanks for the advice, good to hear from people. Am going to tell OH about the situation later today, not looking forward to it, feel like I have let him down. He is supportive, bless him. Anyway I have now written down my debts, what the payments are and how long it will take to repay them. Will add it to my signature. Not feeling good about it today.

Good exercise tho cos now one of the cc is staring out at me as wrong. The others are all coming down a bit each month but that one is not. Thoughts for today are to put CC1 on a loan for a fixed period and then I can concentrate on the others. My income/outgoings will meet these payments
Income - 3200
Outgoings - 3200
= OMG

dukess86

OK here we go, this is my income and outgoings. I have reviewed things like insurance mobile phone insurance and got a better deals. Gas/electric are high cos of the bad winter but hope these will come down soon. The car insurance/tax/ come out of my annual figure. Any help you can offer me to get this sorted and income not so tight would be apreciated.

cc
OH Income

2106

Mine

531

Benefits

546

3183

Outgoings

Mortgage

850

Council

132

Gas

46

Electric

64

TV Lic

12

TV/Broadband

41

Mobiles

70

Life Ins

14

Phone ins

10

Entertainment

54

Misc annual

70

water

28

Boiler service

15

Fuel

140

Food

400

School

100

Spends OH

140

ING

10

CC1

200

CC2

321

CC3

171

CC4

80

Cash

200

overdraft fee

50

3218

Tixy

Hi dukess and thanks for posting it up

dukess86 wrote: »

OK here we go, this is my income and outgoings. I have reviewed things like insurance mobile phone insurance and got a better deals. Gas/electric are high cos of the bad winter but hope these will come down soon. The car insurance/tax/ come out of my annual figure sorry what do you mean by this? oh I see the £70 misc annual figure . Any help you can offer me to get this sorted and income not so tight would be apreciated.

cc
OH Income 2106

Mine 531

Benefits 546

3183

Outgoings

Mortgage 850 what is mortgage value? what APR? fixed? interest only or capital repayment?

Council 132

Gas 46

Electric 64 does look high despite the winter - is some of your heating electric?

TV Lic 12

TV/Broadband 41 have you shopped around for this recently? if with sky have you threatend to leave to see what deal they will give you? would you consider switching to freeview and getting a phone/internet deal for around £20pm?

Mobiles 70 this looks quite high, are you both in contract? have you tried looking for a cheaper deal or asking to drop a tariff? do the children pay for their own?

Life Ins 14

Phone ins 10 have you checked to see if covered under house insurance?

Entertainment 54

Misc annual 70 car insurance, car tax. anything else? car maintenance, MOT, house insurance? haircuts, presents? clothes? might help to break it down

water 28

Boiler service 15 is this the cheapest deal? do you mean it a service cost or an insurance policy?

Fuel 140 car fuel? do you have just 1 car? is it mostly commuting/essential miles?

Food 400 this is high for 4 people. Some here can manage a family of 4 for £200. Perhaps you could try to drop to £300 to start with and see how you get on. Have you ever tried the drop a brand challenge?

School 100 what is this for?

Spends OH 140 what does he spend this on? could it be reduced?

Cash 200 what is this spent on

outgoings excl unsecured debt repayments 2386

Debt repayments
What are the balances and APRs on all these? worth finding them all out so you can work out the cheapest way to tackle your debts. Are these all just minimum payments
overdraft fee 50
ING 10
CC1 200
CC2 321
CC3 171
CC4 80
Unsecured debt repayments 832

3218

There looks like there may be a few areas you could reduce a little to free up a bit more for debt repayments. I'm sure you won't be able to do all of these suggestions but maybe some would save you a bit of money.
Does husband know the extent of the debts at the moment? Have you stopped all spending on the cards?
Might also be useful for you both to keep spending diaries for a bit to have a better track of what his spends money goes on and what your misc annual costs breakdown to. Plus £200 in unaccounted for cash is quite a lot, it would be worth recording what this is being spent on to see if it can be reduced at all.

dukess86

Thanks, I have looked at the tv, broadband and phone and reduced them quite a bit, we have only min package but we are thinking of stopping the all calls things on the landline as we now all have mobile with quite a few minutes on them.

The mobiles at £70 are for 4 of us, £30 eldest daughter, tied for 20 months, £20 for youngest daughter, tied for 20 months, OH and I £10 each on a SIM only basis,

Food - I am dropping my spend here, found a great fruit/veg shop and have cut at least £10 a week there and found a good meat place next door. Bit of a drive away but plan on going every 2 weeks, keeping fruit/veg in fridge makes it last longer, so that could reduct I think to £350 for now and will do the brand thingy.

Mortgage tied in and quite good deals, have £3,000 advances so going in there next week to see what I can do about reducing payments, extending terms, interest only etc. So want to keep the house as we love it here and the cost of moving does not make any sense in the climate today.

We have 2 cars so are thinking of going down to one and just sharing, might put fuel up tho will have to see.

Discussing all with husband today, he is in bed at mo as has been on nights. He will wish he had never woken up.

Tixy

Good luck with talking things through with husband. Hopefully having it all written down will help you both go through things.
I hope he'll be supportive of you in your debt busting quest, its much easier with the whole family on board (though I can imagine explaining to 2 teenage girls about cutting back and reducing bills and not leaving straightners/hairdryers on all the time isn't always easy!)

Once they have been in their phone contracts for 6months you might find the phone company will allow you to reduce eldest daughters phone tariff down one tariff. Not a huge saving maybe but every bit counts.